Bizarre comments from your missus.

You know, my Mrs says so many stupid things and I've been reading this thread and I cant remember a single one of them.

One of my favourite quirks is that she cant say Hu sounds, Huge comes out as Fuge, Hughes comes as Fughes, Human comes out as Fuman etc. I take great pleasure in winding her up about this.

Somethings just came to me, we are in a pet shop, I'm looking at fish tanks.

Her: Is that tank glass or plastic?
Me: Plastic I think.
Her: I thought you, you cant get curved glass.
Me: What?
Her: You cant get curved glass, it would break.
Me: ....

I spent the next couple of hours waving bottles and lightbulbs at her claiming that "it be magic!"

Edit: Another one just came to me.

Living in Purfleet, lots of Eastern European workers around working at the oil plant right oposite our estate - middle of Euro whatever it was - polish flag hanging out on somebodys balcony.

Her: Thats a strange england flag...?
Me: ...

Also, not the current Mrs, but an ex.

I was 22, she was 17.

Her: In 5 years you're going to be 10 years older than me!
Me: ....
 
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Rids said:
One of my favourite quirks is that she cant say Hu sounds, Huge comes out as Fuge, Hughes comes as Fughes, Human comes out as Fuman etc. I take great pleasure in winding her up about this.
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Out of interest, where is she from?
I'm intrigued as to how she is unable to pronounce /hju:/
 
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What does she say, /fju:/ or /hu:/ ?
Record her saying, Few huge fireman are human and post it on here ;)
 
mjt said:
What does she say, /fju:/ or /hu:/ ?
Record her saying, Few huge fireman are human and post it on here ;)
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It's only as bad as the people who say "free" instead of "three" and then say "vuh" instead of "the"

You can usually work out what they mean by the context, but not always. I was stood next to someone in the canteen who asked for "free toast" :D
 
mame said:
It's only as bad as the people who say "free" instead of "three" and then say "vuh" instead of "the"

You can usually work out what they mean by the context, but not always. I was stood next to someone in the canteen who asked for "free toast" :D
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That's different, /ð/ and /θ/ can be hard to produce, /v/ and /f/ are easy alternatives.
What's odd is the /f/ instead of /hj/
 
mame said:
It's only as bad as the people who say "free" instead of "three" and then say "vuh" instead of "the"

You can usually work out what they mean by the context, but not always. I was stood next to someone in the canteen who asked for "free toast" :D
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i talk like that :( i can only properly say "th" if i push my tongue forward and curl the end up over my front teeth slightly which feels odd and probably looks retarded so i dont bother, my wife is constantly correcting me :rolleyes:

its okay for her to say "gan toon" and all that geordie BS though aparently "im not in nottingham now" so cant speak like they do down there....

i remember a thread on here from someone else who cant properly make the "th" sound and a few others came out of the woodwork so i guess its not all that uncommon, my wife really gets on my nerves though sometimes i just wanna ovary punch her because ive started trying to avoid words when im around her :@
 
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That woman is really hot though!

Prescott, I can't see it..

prescott.jpg
 
Had a classic whilst watching the F1 this morning:

Her: What do sperm use their mouths for?
Me: (now covered in the tea i have just spat everywhere) WTF??
Her: You know.. they have eyes and mouths, i know they need their eyes to see where they're going, but what are the mouths for...
Me: *stunned silince* :eek: ...erm they dont have either. and even if they had eyes, its dark...
Her: Are you sure? when we were in school they had smiley faces...

Turns out that a sex education video, she'd seen over ten years previous, had instilled the image of sperm having smiley faces and she'd never questioned it!
 
vertica said:
Had a classic whilst watching the F1 this morning:

Her: What do sperm use their mouths for?
Me: (now covered in the tea i have just spat everywhere) WTF??
Her: You know.. they have eyes and mouths, i know they need their eyes to see where they're going, but what are the mouths for...
Me: *stunned silince* :eek: ...erm they dont have either. and even if they had eyes, its dark...
Her: Are you sure? when we were in school they had smiley faces...

Turns out that a sex education video, she'd seen over ten years previous, had instilled the image of sperm having smiley faces and she'd never questioned it!
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Wow
That is rather special.
 
It's hacking down with rain, driving on a Welsh country road...
"Why are the windows steaming up?"
"Cos there's not enough air in here."
"Why don't you open the sunroof?" WTF??

Again, driving, brakes squeal a bit while slowing down...
"Sounds like you're brakes need oiling." Again, WTF??

"You're not goiong to eat me, are you Mr Pussy cat?" - talking to the cat

edit: another one while she's driving...
Cyclist on main road, she's turning right onto main road (one way system)
Me- "STOP! STOP!"
She nearly takes out the cyclist...
Me "What was that about?"
her- "What? I thought you were talking to the cyclist......"
 
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