Favorite line from the Simpsons?

In court.

Marge (on the stand): My other always said ' If you can't say anything nice about someone don't say anything at all'.
Homer: Will that work?
Lionel Hutz: No, I've tried it before.
 
Marge: "Your father can be surprisingly sensitive. Remember when I giggled at his Sherlock Holmes hat? He sulked for a week and then closed his detective agency..."

Rich
 
titchard said:
Marge: "Your father can be surprisingly sensitive. Remember when I giggled at his Sherlock Holmes hat? He sulked for a week and then closed his detective agency..."

Rich
Click to expand...

Lmao, cant wait for the film and I hope they wrap up the season, its not funny anymore.
 
House said:
Homer: "Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try"

Ralph Wiggum: "when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life."

Homer: "Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose; it's how drunk you get."

Homer: I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over fifty and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called... "The Bus That Couldnt Slow Down"

Homer: You never know when an old calendar might come in handy! Sure, it's not 1985 right now, but who knows what tomorrow will bring?

Homer: If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, its that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling foxy boxy and such and such...

and too many more to list
Click to expand...
:D
 
Homer: "I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T, I mean, S-M-A-R-T!" [after setting his diploma on fire and as the house burns around him]
 
Homer (to Marge after she finds the gun that he said he would get rid of hidden in the freezer) - "Marge, I swear to you, I never thought you'd find out"

Smithers' screensaver of Mr Burns - Smithers.........you are.......good...at.....turning.......me..on.
 
Last edited:
Azagoth said:
Homer: "I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T, I mean, S-M-A-R-T!" [after setting his diploma on fire and as the house burns around him]
Click to expand...

That was off the cuff and Dan Castellaneta just said it like that, it was never written into the script, most of the stuff was never in the script.
 
Captain, on the stand talking about when Homer ate 'all he could eat' at his fish restaurant : "Out of the dark came a beast, more stomach than man" and from the same episode : "Come for the freak, stay for the food"

Pure comedy gold.
 
Homer: Kids let me tell you about a man who people said had a lot of crazy ideas. Now that man's name was.... I forget. But the point of this story is.....well, I forget that too.
 
iBot said:
Bart: Allowance time, ding ding ding ding
Marge: You dont deserve an allowance
Lisa: Sure we do, ding ding ding ding
Homer: Ice cream man!
Click to expand...

Lol!

Loved that, why can't they write stuff like this anymore?
 
Homer: What are you going to do? Release the hounds? Or the bees? Or the hounds with bees in their mouth and when they bark they shoot bees at you?

Homer see's Santa's Little Helper running and barking and says to himself 'i guess he's barking up the wrong tree' to which his brain replies 'there it is homer the smartest thing you ever said and know one was there to hear it'.

Carl: Hey you know what I'm looking forward to? The future. Have you heard about this inter-net thing?
Lenny: Internet?
Carl: Yeah it's the inner netting they invented to line swim trunks. It provides a comforting snugness.

The next morning, the guys stand at the edge of the quarry. It's a
long drop to the water.

Moe: [whistles] You guys really going to dive off of here?
Lenny: Not me. I'm shaking like a French soldier.
Moe: Yeah, I think I just logged onto my internet.
 
Last edited:
Just thought of another:

Big brother representative: Now, Mr. Simpson, may I ask why you're here?
Homer's brain: Don't say revenge. Don't say revenge.
Homer: Ummm... revenge?
Homer's brain: Okay, that's it. I'm outta here. (step step step step step...slam)
 
Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.
 
Abe Simpson when asked if he think his son is a communist...

"My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star."
 
Homer said:
"I’ve been a boxer, mascot, astronaut, baby proofer, imitation Krusty, truck driver, hippie, plow driver, food critic, conceptual artist, grease salesman, carny, mayor, grifter, body guard for the mayor, country western manager, garbage commissioner, mountain climber, farmer, inventor, Smithers, Poochie, celebrity assistant, power plant worker, fortune cookie writer, beer baron, Kwik-E-Mart clerk, homophobe, and missionary, but protecting people, that gives me the best feeling of all."
Click to expand...
 
cheets64 said:
Lmao, cant wait for the film and I hope they wrap up the season, its not funny anymore.
Click to expand...
They do seem to be running out of ideas (hardly surprising really after 500 odd episodes), a lot of stuff just seems funny (weird) rather than funny (ha-ha) now. I find myself watching and going "ok then" quite a lot. I can watch most of the episodes time and time again though.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom