In Mensa!
- Thread starter MajorMaccas
- Start date
The_Sophisticate;17322364 I'm looking at starting my own business said:...and my mensa invitation[/size]
My consulting firm specialises in feasibility work for start ups. I tend to think of it as crushing the dreams of people with delusions of adequacy. Keep driving the forklift to pay my fees, it will save you a great deal in the long run.
What are your charges and how reliable is your final feasibility report? Ie. if you say an idea/business is bad, what are the chances that if we go ahead with the idea/business, that it turns out to be good. Conversely, if you say an idea/businessis good, what are the chances that if we go ahead with the idea/business, that it turns out to be a loss maker?
If you are not prohibitively expensive, start-ups could do well to use your services, if only to save themselves huge losses, later on down the line.
I myself, maybe interested in using your (or a similar) service. Any reports you compile could even be used to pass onto banks and potential investors.
I actually specialise in feasibility for real estate projects (and within that my niche is leisure). However, mentioning the niche would have detracted from the opportunity of taking the Mickey.
My track record is extremely strong as all my advice relies on very rigorous benchmarking of existing businesses. Between my business partner and I, we have well over 25 years worth of experience. As far as I know, no business I have advised on start up has failed but I have advised many people either to take their investment elsewhere or have provided such a reality check that they have not moved forward.
One of the typical uses of my work is indeed raising finance / investment.
Depending on the area you want to start a business in there will be someone with the right skill set and experience to save you from making costly mistakes or give you the reassurance you are on the right track.
I think this is actually a very good service you provide. Many people don't like to their hopes/dreams/inventions dashed, but by giving them a "reality check", it can save them A LOT of money, had they gone ahead with the business and then had it fail on them.
As you are are consultant, do you know of any consulting firms which you can recommend which deal in advising on say, computer programs? As I said, I am looking to develop an AI and it would be interesting to hear the opinion of a consultant. Who knows...maybe a consultant could steer me off into an alternative direction which may be more lucrative.
Cheers, I do think it is a valuable service. I believe I have saved billions in waste and white elephants during my career.
I'm afraid I don't know of any firms in that specific area as it is so far removed from my own. The only advice I can give is avoid generalists - the accounting firms and big generalist consulting practices who turn their hands to any business produce some laughable work when dealing with businesses which are unusual or operating in an unfamiliar niche (and I have had many assignments based around redressing their mistakes).
This thread has taken many turns: over-excited willy waving; the merits or otherwise of Mensa; actual willy waving; the subtleties of IQ testing; personality assassination; and how to choose a consultant among others! Where next?
- Joined
- 20 Oct 2005
- Posts
- 1,900
- Location
- Suffolk, UK
Decent industry you're in there, Skidder, sounds like the high end too, real estate. 
My start up would be in the entertainment/leisure industry, in a warehouse premises. A friend with which I'm going into it has some rich grand parents, (he's currently renting one of their cottages), so we may not need approach a bank. This is both an upside and a downer, in that if its easier to get money from them, they might want us to succeed and not give us the same "reality check" you speak of that a frugal bank manager would
My start up would be in the entertainment/leisure industry, in a warehouse premises. A friend with which I'm going into it has some rich grand parents, (he's currently renting one of their cottages), so we may not need approach a bank. This is both an upside and a downer, in that if its easier to get money from them, they might want us to succeed and not give us the same "reality check" you speak of that a frugal bank manager would
Go on then, let's hear your idea. I'll give you 15 minutes free. Email in trust if you don't want to blow your brainchild on the interwebs.
- Joined
- 20 Oct 2005
- Posts
- 1,900
- Location
- Suffolk, UK
Sent
Not a night/stripclub, plenty in town, all awful. Need a franchise club to come in really. Even something like Liquid/Envy would clean up if they got a decent place.
Not a night/stripclub, plenty in town, all awful. Need a franchise club to come in really. Even something like Liquid/Envy would clean up if they got a decent place.
Sent
Not a night/stripclub, plenty in town, all awful. Need a franchise club to come in really. Even something like Liquid/Envy would clean up if they got a decent place.
Why not a strip club, you'll do well there.
- Joined
- 20 Oct 2005
- Posts
- 1,900
- Location
- Suffolk, UK
Permabanned
- Joined
- 4 Jun 2010
- Posts
- 829
lol this is getting even more pathetic.
Now the OP wants us to belive that a forklift truck driver in a supermarket is onto a "really big thing" aged 22.
Out of thin air, with no experience other than how to look a fool on the web, and get shafted in the bottom by companies like MENSA.
Its hard to see how this thread could stoop any lower in embarassment.
OP, its time to call it a day. Noththing you do from now on can ever claw a shred of respectability back. You have crossed the line into internet legend, you can never recover.
Now the OP wants us to belive that a forklift truck driver in a supermarket is onto a "really big thing" aged 22.
Out of thin air, with no experience other than how to look a fool on the web, and get shafted in the bottom by companies like MENSA.
Its hard to see how this thread could stoop any lower in embarassment.
OP, its time to call it a day. Noththing you do from now on can ever claw a shred of respectability back. You have crossed the line into internet legend, you can never recover.
- Joined
- 20 Oct 2005
- Posts
- 1,900
- Location
- Suffolk, UK
Hardly a get rich quick scheme, but a viable business? I believe so after looking at the details for a while, and doing some market research (yes, people spoke to me in public!
)...
Caporegime
- Joined
- 1 Mar 2008
- Posts
- 26,303
Internet legend?
That's overstating it by a fair bit.
Internet troll yes. Legend, no.
You've had your 15 mins by reply. Best of luck.
- Joined
- 20 Oct 2005
- Posts
- 1,900
- Location
- Suffolk, UK
Very helpful, and to be fair to you, definitely an invaluable service for startups. Once I do more planning and I'm closer to a position to start, I may well pay for your services Thanks
ThanksYou're too small.
Hilarious thread, got to page 8 before I skipped to the end.
So ironic! Absolute classic.
I got invited to Mensa too, they told me I had an IQ in the top 1% and then invited me to join their remedial club for the top 2%. I told them I couldn't lower my standards to that level.
So ironic! Absolute classic.
I got invited to Mensa too, they told me I had an IQ in the top 1% and then invited me to join their remedial club for the top 2%. I told them I couldn't lower my standards to that level.