Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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Does your profile have interesting things on it? A decent picture or two? (apparently you need at least 3 to get some decent success)

Are you also punching well within your weight? (sorry to ask that but its not good to go for women that you think are really fit but you don't stand much of a chance with)

Are you leaving it online all day as well? Got to break it up with at least the illusion that you are doing things with your life out side of online dating (even if its watching new battlestar galactica)
 
DezUk said:
I'm having no luck what so ever, I msg them with more than just a "Hey", asking stuff reklated to their profile and what have you but get no where. If I do geta reply then a small conversation will start and then it all ends :(
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Quite shocked at this, I live up north and have no luck (not many users) when visiting parents in Livingston I can rack up dates within a week. Always thought it was quite easy around that area, well Edinburgh or Glasgow areas.
 
Add an extra picture, one where you are clearly visible. (picture 2 is to dark to be useful)
Add an extra interesting line, something that engages the reader/makes them smile (a joke, random odd tale of something interesting you've done or something fun)
Change your first date to something that is an actual first date, drinks and a meal is a bit vague. (doesn't have to be an actual first date you'll end up doing but just make it something a little more memorable)
Then make sure first date comes up in the conversation fairly early, nothing worse than having a serial chatter for months that has no interest in meeting.

Shouldn't be hard to get something rolling :)
 
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pingwing said:
Add an extra picture, one where you are clearly visible. (picture 2 is to dark to be useful)
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Agreed, pictures are terrible. You can't really see what you look like Dez.

Apart from that I would say the key is to be funny/clever/fun/teasing in your emails.

Maybe try to elaborate on your music interests. Generally people begin conversations because of a common interest but only if it's specific, not if you both have an 'eclectic' taste in music.
 
Jambo said:
Agreed, pictures are terrible. You can't really see what you look like Dez.

Apart from that I would say the key is to be funny/clever/fun/teasing in your emails.

Maybe try to elaborate on your music interests. Generally people begin conversations because of a common interest but only if it's specific, not if you both have an 'eclectic' taste in music.
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Ok added a couple extra pics I had lying about on my phone and updated the First Date section, need to have a think about what else to stick on my profile. Been out of the dating game since October after splitting with the Mrs so maybe a bit rusty.

Cheers for the advice though.
 
Getting dates who then go on to become your girlfriend using the internet will more often than not result in failure.

You can not usually get to know someone just by seeing pictures and typing messages back and forth. It's such a cold interaction, almost business-like, formal if you will. That's just not how getting a partner works in the real world. You need to sense each other and that does not often happen accurately without being in their presence.

Add to that the 'desperation' element. Plenty of people on the internet looking for dates have these preconceived ideas about what their partner should look like, be like and behave like. Most potential partners will fall well short of the criteria being sought of course and so nobody will ever be good enough.

The whole thing is such an unnatural process to begin with. If you want to get to know potential partners, get out there and start talking. It doesn't have to be in a bar or club; indeed they are probably just as bad as using the internet. Now people may say they just can not find people to talk to out on the street, but that is just absolute crap. What people mean to say is that they don't have the confidence to talk to anyone on the street.

A guy I know made a checkout girl his girlfriend just by talking to her on the till she was at (I was there so can verify this). He scanned the tills looking to see which girl was hot. The till she was at had the longest queue but he was determined to make the girl his. He didn't get the girl that day, but on another visit about a week later (I wasn't there this time), she recognised him when he started to chat with her again. The foundation was built on that first visit and the second chat was the confirmation that they liked each other. It may not have worked out, but as he chats to a lot of people it was only a matter of time before someone would take him up on his offer.

Basically, you have to talk to people, and if you can't do that, expect to remain single for a very long time, if not forever. It's not weird talking to random people - if anyone thinks it is, then they are not dating material to begin with so who cares?
 
Purplesky, are you for real? You've never even tried internet dating and you couldn't be more wrong about it.

It seems that you don't understand that you get to know the person on a date, not online. It couldn't really be more natural and is no different to meeting people by other means except for the fact that you have a slight preview of the person beforehand. Which is better.... in my opinion.

It isn't necessarily an alternative to meeting someone out and about, it's often an additional method of meeting someone.
 
Jambo said:
Purplesky, are you for real? You've never even tried internet dating and you couldn't be more wrong about it.

It seems that you don't understand that you get to know the person on a date, not online. It couldn't really be more natural and is no different to meeting people by other means except for the fact that you have a slight preview of the person beforehand. Which is better.... in my opinion.

It isn't necessarily an alternative to meeting someone out and about, it's often an additional method of meeting someone.
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Yes Jambo, I do hear what you are saying. However, it is still an unnatural method of looking for potential dates. Once you take away the attention seekers, the ones who have no intentions of meeting up and the fakes, you're actually left with a whole load of nothing who in the main are not datable. When you think your efforts could have been far more productive in the real world.

Just look at most girl's profiles online (and guys for that matter, although I haven't looked). Most people are clones of each other. They have the same old thing to say, the same boring life and just don't stand out. There's just no effort goes into any of it.... that's because people who actually are interesting are not trying to get dates through the internet but actually doing interesting things in the real world.

Internet dating is generally considered bad news. No, I have never had a date through meeting someone online, but I know lots of others who have tried and failed miserably. If you want to meet a partner, you'll have much better success by doing it the normal way, the way it's supposed to be done. You don't just 'shop' for a date you know which is the way internet dating sites convey the process. The whole thing is artificial and manufactured which is why it rarely works.

I'm sorry if my views seem unbelievable. Yes, some people will meet their partner online, no question about that, but for the majority of people, it will not work.
 
purplesky said:
Yes Jambo, I do hear what you are saying. However, it is still an unnatural method of looking for potential dates. Once you take away the attention seekers, the ones who have no intentions of meeting up and the fakes, you're actually left with a whole load of nothing who in the main are not datable. When you think your efforts could have been far more productive in the real world.
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That would include anyone in this thread, no?
 
purplesky said:
I'm sorry if my views seem unbelievable.
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Yes it does seem unbelievable that you even have a view because you have never tried it. You are wrong.

I have met 10 perfectly nice and interesting girls who weren't for me in the end but I know most of them are in happy relationships now.

As an aside, even though I'm not in a relationship with any of the 10 girls, I still enjoyed meeting them and keep in touch with the majority of them. Online dating is fun!
 
purplesky said:
Yes Jambo, I do hear what you are saying. However, it is still an unnatural method of looking for potential dates. Once you take away the attention seekers, the ones who have no intentions of meeting up and the fakes, you're actually left with a whole load of nothing who in the main are not datable. When you think your efforts could have been far more productive in the real world.

Just look at most girl's profiles online (and guys for that matter, although I haven't looked). Most people are clones of each other. They have the same old thing to say, the same boring life and just don't stand out. There's just no effort goes into any of it.... that's because people who actually are interesting are not trying to get dates through the internet but actually doing interesting things in the real world.

Internet dating is generally considered bad news. No, I have never had a date through meeting someone online, but I know lots of others who have tried and failed miserably. If you want to meet a partner, you'll have much better success by doing it the normal way, the way it's supposed to be done. You don't just 'shop' for a date you know which is the way internet dating sites convey the process. The whole thing is artificial and manufactured which is why it rarely works.

I'm sorry if my views seem unbelievable. Yes, some people will meet their partner online, no question about that, but for the majority of people, it will not work.
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The same can be said for people you meet in real-life... either you are a suitable match, or you are not.

Your views are what people thought 10 years ago... you need to move with the times gramps. :)
 
I was with a girl for a year from a dating site.

However I have met girls in other ways too, but i've yet to meet that girl yet the one that's really special. Try having autism and the scales are even more tipped against you!
 
It's not all bad dating people from the internet you know... Met my partner in Summer 2006, since then we've had two kids and we're getting married next year. There's hope for you all! lol...

Just make sure you learn to tell who's whacky, fake or a time waster. If somebody is interested they will make an effort to meet you, if they meet you and like you they will tell you, don't act desperate and maybe you will find somebody half decent! If these people don't reply move to the next one. I dated loads of girls when I split up with a long term girlfriend and I've seen it all, but there are decent girls out there. :)
 
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