Long Distance relationship

I was in a long distance relationship through uni. Well up until she finished me 4 weeks before I finished my last exam.

:(

Alas, we kept it alive through text messaging everyday and phone calls. MSN/Skype/Facebook chat (delete as appropriate) helped, but it is by no means easy :)
 
Managed to keep one going for a year. My gf went to work abroad - we had only previously been together 1 1/2 years.

Not going to lie, it was very, very difficult. She was in the US and Australia for 6 months each, so only got to see her once while out there, and then once inbetween. The rest of the time we Skyped.

No idea how we did it, but we are still together now and going on to 4 years soon!
 
Relationships aren't all about sex. Yes, it can be an important part but a loving relationship transcends that as it offers so much more than a short time of joy.
 
Been in a somewhat distanced relationship for 3 and half years now, mind you Portsmouth-Brighton isn't exactly long distance I suppose. She's still in Brighton and I'm back home so there's still some distance but we manage to see each other almost every weekend and usually speak every day. If you both put in the effort then it's easily do-able.
 
I did it for a long time. My girlfriend and I went to university a fair distance apart (Cambridge and Edinburgh), and saw each other every...2 months or so, I guess, but that wasn't so bad - we were both working a lot (her more than me, to be fair) and having a good time with new friends in our respective cities. Spent more time together in the Summer, and that was fine the first two years.

The following year, I did my study abroad in China, and we kept it going through that too - it was her final year at Cambridge, so she was ridiculously busy, but we still kept in touch as much as possible, and she came out for a few weeks over Christmas and new year. It was incredibly hard, I admit, and I felt very isolated over there at times. Still, survived that, moved back to the UK, and she came to live with me in Edinburgh for 2 years.

Now, however, she's moved to Leeds to do a PhD, and I'm still in Edinburgh for a while before moving back to China, and we eventually decided we just couldn't do long distance any more, especially after living together. Neither of us was going to stop the other from doing what they wanted, and ultimately we knew this was coming, but I couldn't put my life on hold for 4 years and she couldn't come to China with me, so...that was it really.

It sucks, after that long, especially when we're still in the same country for now. Sucks even more to have happened out of circumstance, as I'm still so hung up over her - she was my best friend after that long too, and the change in dynamic is horrible.

Anyway, er - basically, it's possible, as long as you're both committed, but it can be very hard depending on how often you see each other and your own circumstances, and as I found, it can just be too much in the end.
 
Met my wife in 91 in france. We did cross channel for about 9 years, with bits of living together in between, and lots of LHR<->Paris flight. I finally moved in this country in 1999, and we got married in 2004.
LDR can work, we were (are) pretty independent and yes, 'stuff' might have happened once or twice on both sides -- all forgotten now --, but obviously not serious enough to change the fact we get along so well.

We did have huge phone bills .. it was before the Interweb was widely available, but we were calling each other once a day mostly, and see each other every other week or so, sometime more, sometime less depending of work...

If you think it's the right person, it's well worth fighting for it and making the efforts...
 
Scuzi said:
How much distance is long distance in your case? Try 5000 miles :p

I met my wife-to-be 2 years ago in New Orleans and I've been back every 3-4 weeks without fail since then. It's a hell of a long distance but a few things have kept it going to the point where we get married next month. After that, we still have to do the long distance thing until next August when she is coming here.

1. It has to be real. Not just a fling, not just for the sex, not just an excuse to get out of town now and again.
2. It takes commitment. A lot of it, especially if there is a time difference. You'll have to stay in when you would otherwise go out, you'll have to spend a lot of money on travelling and contact (phone bills if international).
3. It takes a lot of trust. If you're going to be apart for long periods of time then you must trust each other. It's difficult but if you two are right for each other it is possible.
4. You need a goal. If there is no goal of you two ending up under the same roof eventually, it is doomed.
5. If it's international - money. You'll need lots of it. I earn more than average for my age and I am effectively poor now. I moved out of my own house, I rent a small box room from a friend and I have cut out all luxuries. Airfares aren't getting any cheaper.
6. Skype. Lots and lots of Skype.


If you both want it, it is possible. The past two years have been hard. I have learned a lot about life and myself. It's totally worth it though :D
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Everything what he said, except sub in New Orleans for Santa Barbara, we saw each other a bit less, every 8-10 weeks or so, but otherwise spot on., I was earning a fair whack in London but it disappeared quickly enough with flights and then wedding expenses :p

That said, I would say that in some ways a 5,000 mile long distance with said time differences is easier than a 500-mile long distance, because time differences can actually be positive in terms of having good times to catch up but also long periods of your own time (when the other is asleep!) whereas 500 miles away you will never have any 'alone time' ever, your missus will always want to talk when you are out with the lads in the pub etc etc

And things like Skype, BBM/WhatsApp, 18185.co.uk are massssive money savers.

*edit* Oh yeah and just had our 2 year wedding anniversary!
 
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I'm not surprised by the number of long distance relationships as this is a computer forum and you're all massively and unfixably socially broken manboys* but I am surprised by the number who have made it work. Good work!


* For once I'm actually joking about this. Well, a little bit anyway :p

e : I've got to ask - did any of you meet playing WoW or some other online game?
 
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[FnG]magnolia;20056084 said:
e : I've got to ask - did any of you meet playing WoW or some other online game?
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In my case, we met through high school (in Latin, we were cool), though I did have to stop playing both Diablo 2 and Unreal Tournament when she started beating me at them.
 
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