Long Distance relationship
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[FnG]magnolia;20056084 said:I'm not surprised by the number of long distance relationships as this is a computer forum and you're all massively and unfixably socially broken manboys* but I am surprised by the number who have made it work. Good work!
* For once I'm actually joking about this. Well, a little bit anyway
e : I've got to ask - did any of you meet playing WoW or some other online game?
Oh I'm broken alright...
Went to a uni with more girls than men, held in a captive environment (out of city uni) and somehow out of all the local hotties I pick the American girl on holiday for a few weeks... There can't be any other reason!
She seems to be trying to get away from you, bad sign there
Haha it's actually because of the military and getting moved around a lot!!
Just gotten out of a long distance relationship, 5 terrible months since I moved back from NI and iv recently had to break it to her that its just not working out. I hated having to text mindlessly every day as the whole thing went from something fun/special to just a bit mundane
I'd only recommend it if you can cope with a few things. Traveling was the worst one, I couldn't take more 7am flights as it'd take 2 days to get over it then fly back. Planning your lives to sort of match up so when you do see each other you get proper time together is the other one, I found that in the last one we both didn't quite get how plan our actual time together to be fun after a while which wasn't good.
But yeah only do it if you think its massively worth it and that in the future it'll be amazing.
I'd only recommend it if you can cope with a few things. Traveling was the worst one, I couldn't take more 7am flights as it'd take 2 days to get over it then fly back. Planning your lives to sort of match up so when you do see each other you get proper time together is the other one, I found that in the last one we both didn't quite get how plan our actual time together to be fun after a while which wasn't good.
But yeah only do it if you think its massively worth it and that in the future it'll be amazing.
Associate
I've always considered myself to be in a long distance relationship, but after reading this thread I'm not so sure now lol! I live in Stoke and he's in Liverpool. It takes just over an hour to drive from my house to his if the roads are reasonably quiet. We've been together for just over 6 years 
It definitely needs to be a serious relationship, though as the distance isn't ridiculous I wouldn't put too much pressure on yourself seeing as it is fairly new. You just have to know you can trust her really at this stage!
When me and my boyfriend got together, we could only meet once a week because he worked full time and I was in college. He ended up leaving his job and runs a business from home now, and I had hardly any hours at uni and have only been working part time this year so we managed to meet up at least twice a week.
In a couple of weeks I am starting a full time job though so we'll be back to weekends. I'm not feeling happy about it because I miss him loads already through the week but assuming we are in a reasonable financial position we'll be preparing to move in together next year so I can cope with it.
At first, I really struggled with the distance and would get really upset when I had to go home. It's got easier to deal with over time but I still wish I could have him around sometimes for a cuddle if I've had a crap day. We speak on the phone pretty much every day, and if not we at least text and/or talk on msn for a while.
Ultimately, it will work as long as you both want it to work. Circumstances might change later on to cause problems as has been show in some of the other responses, but that can happen in any relationship. You could be with your next door neighbour for 5 years then they could suddenly announce they want to move to the other side of the world.
Hope it works out for you
It definitely needs to be a serious relationship, though as the distance isn't ridiculous I wouldn't put too much pressure on yourself seeing as it is fairly new. You just have to know you can trust her really at this stage!
When me and my boyfriend got together, we could only meet once a week because he worked full time and I was in college. He ended up leaving his job and runs a business from home now, and I had hardly any hours at uni and have only been working part time this year so we managed to meet up at least twice a week.
In a couple of weeks I am starting a full time job though so we'll be back to weekends. I'm not feeling happy about it because I miss him loads already through the week but assuming we are in a reasonable financial position we'll be preparing to move in together next year so I can cope with it.
At first, I really struggled with the distance and would get really upset when I had to go home. It's got easier to deal with over time but I still wish I could have him around sometimes for a cuddle if I've had a crap day. We speak on the phone pretty much every day, and if not we at least text and/or talk on msn for a while.
Ultimately, it will work as long as you both want it to work. Circumstances might change later on to cause problems as has been show in some of the other responses, but that can happen in any relationship. You could be with your next door neighbour for 5 years then they could suddenly announce they want to move to the other side of the world.
Hope it works out for you
Associate
Been living 60 miles from my missus for 2 years and still going strong, sure when I got the horn it can be tough, but I enjoy it. Phone, text, MSN, Facebook when she's away.
I was in one where i only saw my lady a few times a month and it worked fine, we managed nearly 2 years and very little problems that a quick phone call or the occasional surprise visit wouldnt fix.
The only downfall was when she came back home earlier this year i got commitment issues and ended it for reasons even unknown to myself and now im stuck desperate to get back with a girl who 'is over me' and 'only wants to be friends' fun times eh!
Long distance relationships are hard at times but are worth it if the other half is.
Contact and honesty is key, jealousy and constant need to text and getting annoyed if one party does not reply can be bad.
I found it good to sometimes schedules in skype time/phone calls, something to look forward to in the week. Obviously all dependant on how busy you both are with work and other responsibilities etc.
GL and remember if she is worth it the distance is nothing!
The only downfall was when she came back home earlier this year i got commitment issues and ended it for reasons even unknown to myself and now im stuck desperate to get back with a girl who 'is over me' and 'only wants to be friends' fun times eh!
Long distance relationships are hard at times but are worth it if the other half is.
Contact and honesty is key, jealousy and constant need to text and getting annoyed if one party does not reply can be bad.
I found it good to sometimes schedules in skype time/phone calls, something to look forward to in the week. Obviously all dependant on how busy you both are with work and other responsibilities etc.
GL and remember if she is worth it the distance is nothing!
Permabanned
Try 7,000 miles.
Broke up with my over MSN, 99% sure she was cheating and then she was pregnant two months after we broke up with the guy I suspected she was cheating with.
Pfft.
Associate
Well I don't know about continuing an existing relationship via long distance but my wife and I met online in a forum we both frequented.
I was in the UK she was in The Netherlands
We talked back and forth on MSN video chat for nearly 2 years.
Eventually she came over and spent a week with me and to cut a long story short I ended up moving here.
We have been married 6 years in October and have a wonderful 3½ year old daughter.
So in my experience long distance relationships do work you just have to put a bit of extra effort into them.
I was in the UK she was in The Netherlands
We talked back and forth on MSN video chat for nearly 2 years.
Eventually she came over and spent a week with me and to cut a long story short I ended up moving here.
We have been married 6 years in October and have a wonderful 3½ year old daughter.
So in my experience long distance relationships do work you just have to put a bit of extra effort into them.
Soldato
Yup i've done it. Manchester to Bristol for 8 months. We got together 2 weeks before he left (his job was being transfered up to Liverpool and he was going to live with his Nan in Manchester) and then for 8 months either I drove up on a Friday and came back on a Sunday or he came down here for a weekend.
The sneaking around at his Nans house was fun
He ended up finding a job back in Bristol, so moved back down and we moved in together. Lasted another 2 years until he decided he preferred the woman in the pub (I was having medical problems and couldn't have sex at that point)
Was fun throwing all his stuff down the 2 flights of stairs we lived up.
Point is, the distance was never an issue, yes it got crappy sometimes, and I really didn't enjoy spending 3 and a half to 4 hours on the motorways on a Friday evening, but we managed.
The sneaking around at his Nans house was fun
He ended up finding a job back in Bristol, so moved back down and we moved in together. Lasted another 2 years until he decided he preferred the woman in the pub (I was having medical problems and couldn't have sex at that point)
Was fun throwing all his stuff down the 2 flights of stairs we lived up.
Point is, the distance was never an issue, yes it got crappy sometimes, and I really didn't enjoy spending 3 and a half to 4 hours on the motorways on a Friday evening, but we managed.
My wife works in the UK and has done so for the last 2 years. I live in Prague and see her every 2 or 3 months.
Its not easy on her, we talk on the phone every day on her way to work but come the new year I am going to have to get a job in a UK hospital and move back home.
Its not easy on her, we talk on the phone every day on her way to work but come the new year I am going to have to get a job in a UK hospital and move back home.
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[FnG]magnolia;20056084 said:
Nope, met at our uni club - problem is, I was her lecturer and she was a 1st year undergrad
Still together though and have left the uni now.
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How much distance is long distance in your case? Try 5000 miles
I met my wife-to-be 2 years ago in New Orleans and I've been back every 3-4 weeks without fail since then. It's a hell of a long distance but a few things have kept it going to the point where we get married next month. After that, we still have to do the long distance thing until next August when she is coming here.
1. It has to be real. Not just a fling, not just for the sex, not just an excuse to get out of town now and again.
2. It takes commitment. A lot of it, especially if there is a time difference. You'll have to stay in when you would otherwise go out, you'll have to spend a lot of money on travelling and contact (phone bills if international).
3. It takes a lot of trust. If you're going to be apart for long periods of time then you must trust each other. It's difficult but if you two are right for each other it is possible.
4. You need a goal. If there is no goal of you two ending up under the same roof eventually, it is doomed.
5. If it's international - money. You'll need lots of it. I earn more than average for my age and I am effectively poor now. I moved out of my own house, I rent a small box room from a friend and I have cut out all luxuries. Airfares aren't getting any cheaper.
6. Skype. Lots and lots of Skype.
If you both want it, it is possible. The past two years have been hard. I have learned a lot about life and myself. It's totally worth it though
+1 - Pretty much this.
Establish regular patterns of communication, ensure that you both have a clear vision of when the LD is going to be taken out of the relationship.
Associate
When i met my wife we lived around 300 miles apart, did the long distance bit for about 6 months seeing each other for a few days every month but in the end it worked out better and cheaper for me to move closer to her.
When we did do long distance we talked everyday on skype with webcam and then sent texts and gamed online together so we coped just fine
When we did do long distance we talked everyday on skype with webcam and then sent texts and gamed online together so we coped just fine
done it for 2 years so far. we went into it knowing it was going to be long distance as i was joining the RAF and she was in uni at Edinburgh. i was at wolves, swindon and now oxford. we used to meet half way in york most of the time.
i think it depends on the people involved to be honest. it requires a certain temperament. i couldnt have done it with some of my past girlfriends but this one its working with.
i think it depends on the people involved to be honest. it requires a certain temperament. i couldnt have done it with some of my past girlfriends but this one its working with.
By cheating on each other.