Marriage

Wicksta · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:14

helpimcrap said:
it's the prospect. you are saying you intend to stay together until you die whereas a boyfriend/girlfriend thing means either could walk away any time.

no wonder this countries up the creek judging by some of the moral attitudes shown here.

Did I ever say I was against marraige? I'm not - I'll probably be doing it myself in the near future. I'm just curious as to why people think married couples should get benefits over non married couples so have your rolleyes back.

I'd say that when we bought a house together that was a far bigger commitment than getting hitched. What happened when we bought a house though, did we get any benefits? No, in fact we were taxed a huge amount (stamp duty).

EDIT: I'll add that I don't think couples who decide not to get married are 'immoral' as helpimcrap seems to, it should be a personal choice.

Deleted member 77746 · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:16

digipeep said:
Should I do it or not, the missus is sending out all the signals that me and her need to commit.

Let the forum decide.

You should no the answer to this without asking the forum. You expect people who you don't know let you decide something like this.

helpimcrap · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:17

Wicksta said:
Did I ever say I was against marraige? I'm not - I'll probably be doing it myself in the near future. I'm just curious as to why people think married couples should get benefits over non married couples so have your rolleyes back.

I'd say that when we bought a house together that was a far bigger commitment than getting hitched. What happened when we bought a house though, did we get any benefits? No, in fact we were taxed a huge amount (stamp duty).

glad to hear it. wasn't a roll eyes at your comment per se.

jbloggs · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:19

digipeep said:
Let the forum decide.

If you can't decide for yourself, I would forget about it, until such times as your can!

teulk · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:20

Evangelion said:
Getting married is as cheap as you want it to be.

I don't understand why anyone would be stupid enough to get into debt for a wedding. It makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

My wedding cost a mere £2,500 and was largely paid for by my wife and myself - in cash. My in-laws contributed about £1,000.

Your right, it need not cost a lot of money but what is and what isnt a lot of money is an individual thing. For me what you call "a mere £2500" is a lot of money but in comparison to what you could pay to get married is very cheap.

Dolph · 22 Mar 2009 at 16:41

Wicksta said:
What extra responsibilities would I be taking on if I married my girlfriend , with whom I own a house and have lived with for nearly 5 years?

A defined legal obligation to support her.

http://www.adviceguide.org.uk/index...differences.htm#Financial_support_maintenance

In the event that someone is unable to support themselves, the responsibility falls to the state, unless they are married, in which case, it falls to the spouse first.

That extra responsibility is what the state used to recognise through tax breaks for married couples.

You can say that you would do that anyway (and I'd agree), but you aren't obligated to do it if you are just living together.

thevet · 22 Mar 2009 at 17:07

getting married in 2010 july,would have been together for 7 years costing us £25000.....

Pilky01 · 22 Mar 2009 at 17:08

Are you serious?

You want a forum to decide one of the most important decisions of your life?

SexyGreyFox · 22 Mar 2009 at 17:16

thevet said:
getting married in 2010 july,would have been together for 7 years costing us £25000.....

Is that all? - you mustn't love each other very much.
They who spend the mosterest are the mosterest in love - fact.

Wicksta · 22 Mar 2009 at 17:23

Dolph said:
A defined legal obligation to support her.

http://www.adviceguide.org.uk/index...differences.htm#Financial_support_maintenance

In the event that someone is unable to support themselves, the responsibility falls to the state, unless they are married, in which case, it falls to the spouse first.

That extra responsibility is what the state used to recognise through tax breaks for married couples.

You can say that you would do that anyway (and I'd agree), but you aren't obligated to do it if you are just living together.

Ahh right thanks, that was interesting, I still don't think it's reason enough to give benefits to married couples though. As you say most people would do it anyway.

I'll certainly add that to my list of reasons to not get married though.

^TANK^ · 22 Mar 2009 at 17:57

PESolution said:
i hope she reads this and you get rightly dumped

Why :-/.

dantheman213 · 22 Mar 2009 at 18:24

Ultimately what will it change in your relationship? I think marriage is something women are a lot keener on!

Don't forget it'll cost you a lot more if you split up too!

thevet said:
getting married in 2010 july,would have been together for 7 years costing us £25000.....

woah.....thats an expensive wedding. Does that include honeymoon?

s0ck · 22 Mar 2009 at 19:04

Jamesdavid3 said:
These days MORE and more people are NOT getting married...

if you look at the stats is dropping so much. i think in another 10 years it will be rare to get married..

Agreed.
It just seems so... unnecessary?

E61 Grouphead · 22 Mar 2009 at 19:23

Fuzz · 22 Mar 2009 at 20:19

If it is something she wants and you know you want to be with her, then let her have her dream.
It's not as if YOU need a bit of official paper to say that you love someone.
Do it for her.