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uncle_rufus · 1 Aug 2020 at 21:48

LewisRaz said:
Still not sure on visitation on the wards afterwards either. The Mrs thinks I might have to book timeslots

We have been told that the official rule is that you get 1 hour per day which you have to book in advance (and is subject to how many people they have on the ward)... but our midwife said between us and her that in practice they understand how harsh it is so unless the ward is literally bursting at the seams they will more than likely be very slack with how long they let you stay for

Unseul · 1 Aug 2020 at 22:14

Although not Covid times, my sister in law's, mother in law, was the maternity nurse who delivered our baby. She had a word with the staff and I got to stay a lot later than most, we were lucky enough to be alone in a 4 bed ward for a while, so I even got to spend the night once.

Here's hoping for a smooth birth!

LewisRaz · 1 Aug 2020 at 22:34

uncle_rufus said:
We have been told that the official rule is that you get 1 hour per day which you have to book in advance (and is subject to how many people they have on the ward)... but our midwife said between us and her that in practice they understand how harsh it is so unless the ward is literally bursting at the seams they will more than likely be very slack with how long they let you stay for

1 Hour per day!!! Thats awful

Devrij · 2 Aug 2020 at 07:43

Arsonist said:
Good luck! We're in on the Tuesday morning for a planned c-section, for baby #1. Very nervous! Strange to think this time in 4 days I'll have a newborn in the house, and I'll officially be a father...

uncle_rufus said:
Good luck all - I'll throw my hat in the ring too - we are at 39 weeks now on our first so could be along any day now

LewisRaz said:
Just hope we arent stuck in hospital too long this time. Was 9 days last time!

Still not sure on visitation on the wards afterwards either. The Mrs thinks I might have to book timeslots

Good luck gents, and hold onto your hats for the first timers, it will really blow your mind!

theone8181 · 2 Aug 2020 at 10:08

LewisRaz said:
1 Hour per day!!! Thats awful

But on the bright side, make the most of the 23 hours of peace and quiet

.

LewisRaz · 2 Aug 2020 at 11:14

theone8181 said:
But on the bright side, make the most of the 23 hours of peace and quiet.

Ive already arranged the older one to stay at my mums for a few days. Told the Mrs I plan on having some epic gaming sessions and takeaway for lunch and dinner. I think its a good job she cant get up and hit me right now

uncle_rufus · 2 Aug 2020 at 11:34

It's a bit stupid in my opinion... just like many other things to do with how lockdown measures are enforced. So it's not okay for me to be there in hospital for more than an hour with 2 people who I am around 24/7 and a handful of hospital staff... but it's perfectly fine if I want to head down the boozer during the other 23 hours and mix with all sorts... in fact I could come and go from the hospital ward and the pub everyday, which is just ridiculous. I would much rather they make the rule something like "You are only allowed one visitor throughout your stay" (i.e. you can have someone be there as much as you like, within reason, but it has the be the same person, so you can't have your partner half a day then your mum then someone else)

LewisRaz · 2 Aug 2020 at 13:43

Just called the ward and they have said partners can stay from the onset of labour. Once/if moved onto the ward they are only using the beds in the corners of the room and as long as they stay within this capacity partners can stay all day. If they have to start using the middle beds then it will be 45min booked slots.

uncle_rufus · 3 Aug 2020 at 14:19

Okay so here's another question which the wife and I are a bit stuck with...

Given COVID and the current situation that the country is starting to see some flare ups and whatnot, and it's not really looking like we are past it yet, what is the right thing to do with regards to people visiting wanting to see the new baby? Naturally various people from both our families want to visit - we've said we'd like a week or so to get settled before we are ready for visitors and then they are not planning to stay with us but to book hotels and pop over (we don't live close)

Strictly speaking I guess the safest things to do would actually be to have no visitors at all... but I can't see that being very popular (that said I would still put my foot down if I really had to). But if they do visit - what is an acceptable amount of risk? Would you let a relative hold the baby? Interact with the baby at all? Make everyone wear masks? I'm really not sure at all, and I know we would hate ourselves (not to mention said family member would feel awful) if she got sick

Unseul · 3 Aug 2020 at 14:28

I'd have closest relatives only, and tell them they'll need to wear masks, and they'll need to fully alcohol gel and soap wash before holding briefly. No smelling the head, no kisses.

LewisRaz · 4 Aug 2020 at 10:04

uncle_rufus said:
Okay so here's another question which the wife and I are a bit stuck with...

Given COVID and the current situation that the country is starting to see some flare ups and whatnot, and it's not really looking like we are past it yet, what is the right thing to do with regards to people visiting wanting to see the new baby? Naturally various people from both our families want to visit - we've said we'd like a week or so to get settled before we are ready for visitors and then they are not planning to stay with us but to book hotels and pop over (we don't live close)

Strictly speaking I guess the safest things to do would actually be to have no visitors at all... but I can't see that being very popular (that said I would still put my foot down if I really had to). But if they do visit - what is an acceptable amount of risk? Would you let a relative hold the baby? Interact with the baby at all? Make everyone wear masks? I'm really not sure at all, and I know we would hate ourselves (not to mention said family member would feel awful) if she got sick

We are going with masks + sanitize at the door + no physical contact with the baby. Would that actually prevent the spread? Who knows but its a reasonable precaution to take.

My daughter was born at 4:49 this morning. The pre-labour ward allowed me to stay until 8pm and then I was sent home. I had some dinner at home then drove to the hospital carpark and shut my eyes for a bit. Delivery suite called me to say come in at about 1am and I was allowed there throughout.
Moved onto the ward at about 8:30am where I was told I am allowed one 45min slot per day. Chose to take it there and then and was duly told to leave at 9:15. Thats all visitation for the whole day

Unseul · 4 Aug 2020 at 10:13

LewisRaz said:
We are going with masks + sanitize at the door + no physical contact with the baby. Would that actually prevent the spread? Who knows but its a reasonable precaution to take.

My daughter was born at 4:49 this morning. The pre-labour ward allowed me to stay until 8pm and then I was sent home. I had some dinner at home then drove to the hospital carpark and shut my eyes for a bit. Delivery suite called me to say come in at about 1am and I was allowed there throughout.
Moved onto the ward at about 8:30am where I was told I am allowed one 45min slot per day. Chose to take it there and then and was duly told to leave at 9:15. Thats all visitation for the whole day

I think it's reasonable, only question would be, is that option available to everyone who wants to come along, or close family only?

Maybe do it all in the garden as well (if that's an option for you).

uncle_rufus · 4 Aug 2020 at 10:31

LewisRaz said:
We are going with masks + sanitize at the door + no physical contact with the baby. Would that actually prevent the spread? Who knows but its a reasonable precaution to take.

My daughter was born at 4:49 this morning. The pre-labour ward allowed me to stay until 8pm and then I was sent home. I had some dinner at home then drove to the hospital carpark and shut my eyes for a bit. Delivery suite called me to say come in at about 1am and I was allowed there throughout.
Moved onto the ward at about 8:30am where I was told I am allowed one 45min slot per day. Chose to take it there and then and was duly told to leave at 9:15. Thats all visitation for the whole day

That sucks... especially because my wife was intending to try and stay a little longer to get help and advice from the midwives etc. but I expect if I am not allowed to be there she will rather lean towards coming home asap

I think we are probably going to go for something similar - contemplating saying those that want to are allowed a brief hold of the baby whilst wearing masks and having just sanitized themselves thoroughly, and the rest of the time she will be kept out of the way or on one of us. But it's just so impossible to know what the right thing to do is

Arsonist · 4 Aug 2020 at 11:03

LewisRaz said:
We are going with masks + sanitize at the door + no physical contact with the baby. Would that actually prevent the spread? Who knows but its a reasonable precaution to take.

My daughter was born at 4:49 this morning. The pre-labour ward allowed me to stay until 8pm and then I was sent home. I had some dinner at home then drove to the hospital carpark and shut my eyes for a bit. Delivery suite called me to say come in at about 1am and I was allowed there throughout.
Moved onto the ward at about 8:30am where I was told I am allowed one 45min slot per day. Chose to take it there and then and was duly told to leave at 9:15. Thats all visitation for the whole day

Congratulations! That's tough visiting hours though! I'm currently sat in the c-section ward, awaiting the imminent delivery of our first. I'm allowed to be here from 7.30am this morning until she has the op, likely around 1pm, and then 2 hours immediately after surgery to be with my partner and our new baby. There's also visiting hours every day from 1-4pm, but only for the birthing partner. So I'll still be able to pop in tomorrow for 3 hours if she's staying more than 1 night. Getting very nervous though!!

Unseul · 4 Aug 2020 at 11:19

It's amazing guys. Enjoy it. As absolutely terrifying as it is, it's an amazing time (especially if you can be at home to some degree). It only gets more complicated (but less scary) as time goes on.

Enjoy getting no sleep, then when you finally do get a longer period of peace and quiet, panicking because the baby has been quiet for too long

.

Devrij · 5 Aug 2020 at 08:26

I think the most bewildering part for me was when it's all over, and they're just like "off you go then". I was like, do I not get a manual, have to pass a test of some kind? Nope, all yours now. I felt like I had stolen her because surely I shouldn't be allowed to just go off without some sort of official training on how to keep my child alive.

I was sent home after my wife's emergency c section because she was in a ward, and you know what, after a week of labour, I was totally happy to go home and have a good night's sleep

RoboCod · 5 Aug 2020 at 08:38

The covid restrictions makes all more the reason for having a home birth. Do it!

robj20 · 5 Aug 2020 at 08:43

Home births seem a stupid idea to me.

Not long to go until we find out if we're having a boy or a girl. Due around early January.

RoboCod · 5 Aug 2020 at 08:45

robj20 said:
Home births seem a stupid idea to me.

Not long to go until we find out if we're having a boy or a girl. Due around early January.

That's your opinion. All births are pretty good really though aren't they

robj20 · 5 Aug 2020 at 08:48

RoboCod said:
That's your opinion. All births are pretty good really though aren't they

Well so far id say no, hoping number two goes okay.
I know it's my opinion that's why I said it, lol. Strong reason though if number one had been a home birth he'd be dead. But even before that why increase the risk of help bring so far away if something goes wrong.

Stressing like crazy about this one, I couldn't go through all that again. I wouldn't either.
Looking after two is going to be interesting.