OcUK Dadsnet thread

[ci_newman]

Without more background, it's hard to pass judgement to be honest.

It is easier to apply the rules equally to everyone regardless of circumstances though, instead of favourable treatment for selected children.

If you believe you have a genuine complaint though, raise it with the local councils education department.

 

[Gimpymoo]

Their mother, my wife, contracted encephalitis this time last year.

To the point, her short term and long term memory has been impacted severely, has also affected her physical health owing to the damage to the brain.

A healthy women, mother and wife in her mid forties, working full time, now needing pretty much daily care.

The kids have been through hell (no idea how they have managed to keep going, my eldest had to do GCSE'S when her mum was in ICU).

Upshot is, my plate is full and sometimes (mostly not) things do not goto plan

 

[ci_newman]

Their mother, my wife, contracted encephalitis this time last year.

To the point, her short term and long term memory has been impacted severely, has also affected her physical health owing to the damage to the brain.

A healthy women, mother and wife in her mid forties, working full time, now needing pretty much daily care.

The kids have been through hell (no idea how they have managed to keep going, my eldest had to do GCSE'S when her mum was in ICU).

Upshot is, my plate is full and sometimes (mostly not) things do not goto plan

Sorry, my bad, I wasn't trying to pry.

I should have just summarised with "raise a complaint with the council".

 

[The Funktopus]

My 2 & 1/2 year old daughter’s just done the equivalent of Sideshow Bob stepping on a rake when she decided to stomp on the narrow end of an empty rectangular Lego box. Obviously it flew up and whacked her on the noggin’, making a rather comical sounding ‘donk’ when it connected. Am I a terrible person for having the overwhelming urge to laugh when she just wants sympathy and comfort?

 

[alchal]

My 2 & 1/2 year old daughter’s just done the equivalent of Sideshow Bob stepping on a rake when she decided to stomp on the narrow end of an empty rectangular Lego box. Obviously it flew up and whacked her on the noggin’, making a rather comical sounding ‘donk’ when it connected. Am I a terrible person for having the overwhelming urge to laugh when she just wants sympathy and comfort?

Nope, we do it all the time.

Our girl walked into the corner of a door because she has to walk around with a book over her face... No idea why, but was comical, she didn't hurt herself too much really but pulled some right faces and cried.

 

[dav3evans]

Evening gents! The time is fast approaching for our boy to come to us and would like a little help "spec me a" style. Been on the adoption journey for nearly 5 years so feels pretty surreal to be posting. Still might go **** up but lets focus on the positives

Looking for changing bag recommendations if you have any please! I've swayed between "buy one with pockets for everything you need" to "your current bag is fine, stop it".

Hoping to get something that could pass off as any other bag, but maybe with some useful inside setups to make things easier to organise, or maybe some things to consider that an inexperienced noob like me hasn't thought of yet. TIA!

 

[Devrij]

Evening gents! The time is fast approaching for our boy to come to us and would like a little help "spec me a" style. Been on the adoption journey for nearly 5 years so feels pretty surreal to be posting. Still might go **** up but lets focus on the positives

Looking for changing bag recommendations if you have any please! I've swayed between "buy one with pockets for everything you need" to "your current bag is fine, stop it".

Hoping to get something that could pass off as any other bag, but maybe with some useful inside setups to make things easier to organise, or maybe some things to consider that an inexperienced noob like me hasn't thought of yet. TIA!

Get a bag that just opens up really well (like those bags with the double zip on top), but not too big because trust me you are just gonna throw stuff in it and will need to rummage to find what you need, but you will likely not be out long enough to need a huge bag. Spare clothes (like a couple baby grows if new baby), nappies, wipes, muslin squares (lots) and if formula, then some of those premade formula things and a couple bottles. Sounds like a lot, but it fits into something like 2/3 the size of your average rucksack

Wipes, nappies, and depending on the age (we talking brand new fresh off the lot, or a few miles on the clock?) baby grows.

 

[dav3evans]

Oh very much still got that new car baby smell! Born at the end of last year so we're essentially starting from 0. Sounds like a big easy access hole (cheeky) is better than a bunch of separate compartments? I guess I'm naively thinking I'll put everything neatly in its place all the time

 

[Devrij]

Oh very much still got that new car baby smell! Born at the end of last year so we're essentially starting from 0. Sounds like a big easy access hole (cheeky) is better than a bunch of separate compartments? I guess I'm naively thinking I'll put everything neatly in its place all the time

I mean, maybe you will. We didn't though. Gotta remember your partner needs to go with the same system so unless you are both organised it will end up being a few packets of baby wipes (all opened), a handful of nappies (loose in the bag), and spare clothes squashed in the corner. The only additional compartment you need is the "this is disgusting and we will wash it when we get home" compartment to avoid cross contamination with clean stuff.

Forget fancy outfits. Get like... one maybe. The kid is gonna grow out of it way faster than you can imagine, and when they puke on it after 10 mins you'll be back in the baby grows anyways, which are just so much easier to get on and off a wriggly child that has managed to **** up their back.

 

[dav3evans]

That's one with I do have covered - clothes. I went to one of those nearly-new sales with my sister who is a veteran at those things. Stuff like 10 baby grows for £2. I think I spent about £100 and came away with enough stuff for up to 6 months as well as a travel cot, bouncer, bumbo seat, bath seat, tummy time play area thing, sterilisers, bibs, almost the whole shebang! As you say it's all gonna get barfed/pooped on so other than gifted stuff, I'm just not bothering with new and fancy...other than a couple of Stormtrooper onesies of course

 

[neocon]

I'm taking my daughter out of reception to go and see her grandparents overseas. She will miss 4 weeks of reception. I don't mind the £60 fine, but could it be more?

The school don't respond other than to say it will be an unauthorized absence.

 

[SixTwoSix]

I'm taking my daughter out of reception to go and see her grandparents overseas. She will miss 4 weeks of reception. I don't mind the £60 fine, but could it be more?

The school don't respond other than to say it will be an unauthorized absence.

Ensure there is actually a fine, when we took our son out of reception for a week, they weren't happy but no fines as reception year is optional.

 

[Azza]

I'm taking my daughter out of reception to go and see her grandparents overseas. She will miss 4 weeks of reception. I don't mind the £60 fine, but could it be more?

The school don't respond other than to say it will be an unauthorized absence.

Presumably she's 4 in reception?

If so then you shouldn't even get fined as she's under compulsory school age.

 

[neocon]

Presumably she's 4 in reception?

If so then you shouldn't even get fined as she's under compulsory school age.

She's 5 now

 

[ci_newman]

School attendance and absence

You can be prosecuted if your child has unauthorised absence from school - truancy, help with getting your child to school, and legal action to enforce school attendance

www.gov.uk

Missing 4 weeks of school really is quite a lot, equivalent to 10% of the entire school year. Yes I'd expect the school and maybe even the council to get involved, which could mean fines up to £2500

[Edit] As a parent whose child missed a lot of school due to covid lockdowns, it will set your child back significantly behind her peers to miss that much school. She can catch up, but that will be your responsibility and not the schools.

 

[SixTwoSix]

School attendance and absence

You can be prosecuted if your child has unauthorised absence from school - truancy, help with getting your child to school, and legal action to enforce school attendance

www.gov.uk

Missing 4 weeks of school really is quite a lot, equivalent to 10% of the entire school year. Yes I'd expect the school and maybe even the council to get involved, which could mean fines up to £2500

While I agree that 4 weeks is a long time and too much time off (imo), attendance for reception year is optional and therefore isn't fineable as it's outside of compulsory age.

That said, the school could easily have internal policies whereby they remove a pupil that misses that much time.

She's 5 now

The important thing here is whether she is in reception or year 1 - which from what you've said it's clearly reception, so the fines should not apply.

You need to have an honest and clear conversation with the school and find out their policies.

 

[ci_newman]

While I agree that 4 weeks is a long time and too much time off (imo), attendance for reception year is optional and therefore isn't fineable as it's outside of compulsory age.

That said, the school could easily have internal policies whereby they remove a pupil that misses that much time.



The important thing here is whether she is in reception or year 1 - which from what you've said it's clearly reception, so the fines should not apply.

You need to have an honest and clear conversation with the school and find out their policies.

I think you've got that wrong, compulsary school age is the TERM after they've turned 5, not the school year after:

School admissions

Get a place for your child at a primary or secondary school - applications, deadlines, admission criteria, appeals and complaints.

www.gov.uk

Your child must start full-time education once they reach compulsory school age. This is on 31 December, 31 March or 31 August following their fifth birthday - whichever comes first. If your child’s fifth birthday is on one of those dates then they reach compulsory school age on that date.

[Edit] With some exceptions of course, if the child turned 5 in January then they wouldn't receive fines as long as the 4 week break was before 31st March for example.

 

[SixTwoSix]

I think you've got that wrong, compulsary school age is the TERM after they've turned 5, not the school year after:

School admissions

Get a place for your child at a primary or secondary school - applications, deadlines, admission criteria, appeals and complaints.

www.gov.uk

[Edit] With some exceptions of course, if the child turned 5 in January then they wouldn't receive fines as long as the 4 week break was before 31st March for example.

Ah OK, hands up, my mistake.

 

[neocon]

Oh dear, sounds expensive. Cry

Coming home to £2500 bill

 

[SixTwoSix]

Oh dear, sounds expensive. Cry

Coming home to £2500 bill

When did your child turn 5?