I'd have them both round here so that's not the issue. We could easily accommodate everyone. I've not mentioned it to my mum as simply put i know and understand her problems and if I put this on her she'd likely suffer an anxiety attack.
OcUK Hivemind, am I in the wrong?
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I'd have them both round here so that's not the issue. We could easily accommodate everyone. I've not mentioned it to my mum as simply put i know and understand her problems and if I put this on her she'd likely suffer an anxiety attack.
Caporegime
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Just tell her you'll have them around, you will anyway, you know you will, they always win, you're on a hiding to nothing 
Soldato
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Brother's fault, but I'm curious to how old all the siblings etc. are in this situation?
Logically, you're in the right and the brother is at fault.
Realistically, you're in the wrong because your missus has decided that she wants her parents to be over for Christmas Dinner and neither logic, nor who is at fault, is important.
Can you ask your Dad about it, to save your Mum's anxiety yet get another perspective on the matter?
Realistically, you're in the wrong because your missus has decided that she wants her parents to be over for Christmas Dinner and neither logic, nor who is at fault, is important.
Can you ask your Dad about it, to save your Mum's anxiety yet get another perspective on the matter?
The game would be too easy. Women are the key to all the obscure achievements
You stay at yer mams for xmas, and she can stay with hers
This.
Also, this.
Yes, he is at fault but that's irrelevant. The issue is that your partner's parents are going to be alone at Chrismas and this important to your partner. You need to accommodate both your mother and your partner. So you go to one on Christmas Eve and the other on Christmas Day.
Change the format so there is as little in the way of meal awkwardness as possible - maybe not ideal if some have a romantic vision of a proper Christmas dinner, etc. but for instance in the past when we've had mixed family/friends we've done an early Christmas dinner for some family then had a big buffet type meal late afternoon when everyone is over, etc. also with regard to activities and so on to try and avoid as much social awkwardness as possible - not so easy with the current circumstances but we've done stuff in the past were some people went for a walk for a good chunk of the day to make it easier on people who struggle socially.
You stay at yer mams for xmas, and she can stay with hers
Not a good idea if you want the relationship to continue.
Well if the relationship was so fragile that going their separate ways on Christmas would be terminal, it wouldn't be such a huge loss
e: For one year (assuming the brother doesn't decide to be a splitter permanently!)
FTFY
If you saw her parents on Boxing Day, after they'd seen her brother and you'd seen your mum on Christmas day then you'd be breaking the '3 households' bubble anyway... So probably lucky he cancelled!
