Parenting: Am I being too old fashioned/strict?

Your first idea is a no-brainer, really; every family (circumstances permitting) should sit together at the dinner table.

Also, make sure you get your child to help out a little around the house for their pocket money, such as cleaning dishes after meals and tidying their room, etc. If you do this from the get-go, they won't turn into a spoilt brat and leach off you when they're older; instead, they'll realise they need to work for their money and look for a part-time job.
 
I don't have kids but what the OP describes is how me and my sister were brought up and I'd would agree with his sentiments.

Most people I know with kids try and do those things as much as possible too.
 
Sounds like you have a commendable approach to parenthood Sheff, a lot of this will become much clearer when you actually have a child though so dont be too set in stone yet.

I definately agree with no kids sleeping in the bed, ours never have and never will yet a friend of hers at school still does (age 4 and a half) every night....parents must be nuts!!!

P.S - Sheff, being in Newton abbot you must be just down the road from me...somewhere!!!
 
memyselfandi said:
Most people I know with kids try and do those things as much as possible too.
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I think virtually all parents will try to do it.

The difference between success and failure is that some parents will give up when the child protests.

I'm not saying parenting is easy, in fact it may even be harder now than it was when I was a kid, but I suspect some parents just don't try hard enough.

When you hear stories of kids arriving at school not toilet trained etc, I make the assumption that the parent(s) did not set out with the intention to badly raise their kids, but they just lacked the willpower to stick with it.
 
A couple of additional things that help.

Always back up the other parent, even if you privately think they are wrong. Don't let your kid get in to the habit of playing you off against each other and never pass responsibility on to the other parent if asked something.

Never make a threat you aren't prepared to follow up. If you say "Do that one more time and you go to bed with no supper" make sure you are going to do that. If you give in after a tantrum all you do is teach the child that having a tantrum is how to get it's own way.
 
mjt said:
if those 2 things were done by everyone, the world would be a better place :p

having dinner in front of the TV is one thing if you're a student or you live on your own, but doing it as a family is just sad :(
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I don't see how it's sad? Or how it would make the world a better place?

We never ate at the table, and still don't. I turned out absolutely fine.*


*This may not be totally correct.
 
sounds spot on to me, havin two nippers (8 & 2) i am planning on doing the first when we get a house big enough and the wife agrees, round the table, no tele.

No2 is a hard one, but stick with it.
 
Make them earn their pocket money. Problems when they're little, chores when they're older. If any of them look like they're turning into ******** at any point, drown them. It's best for everyone.
 
to the op:

its a nice idea, but if you are not that sort of family already (eating around a table) then you will find it hard becoming that way.

anyway, people say all sorts before a child comes along, then you have the kid and realise that you do things differently to planned :p
 
What I had as a child was meals around the table except on friday night when we sat through watching TV. Good old days! How easy to be pleased as a child!
 
1. With dinner/tea I'd like to sit around a table and perhaps talk to my child, right now we eat meals in front of the television which is fine for us but I'd quite like a more traditional approach.
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Very important. I think studies into children and families have highlighted this for a while now. Dinner can be very important family time.

This is how we will be doing things :)

2. No sweets unless they're a treat or special occasion or bought with pocket money, and I refuse to give pocket money if my child misbehaves.
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Good and logical thinking. I wouldn't be rewarding a misbehaving child, no brainer.
 
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