**The Mental Health Thread**

Lysander said:
Well, my therapist cancelled on me for the second time in a month. Yesterday morning as well, I can't help feeling she just got drunk watching the football on Sunday night [whether that is true or not - but let's face it, anyone who rang in sick yesterday looks suspicious]. I feel dreadful now and like I've been abandoned by the service. I wrote to her yesterday, no response. This has made me feel a hell of a lot worse and my mood has plummeted as a result.
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Sadly common at least in my experience, Ive had 2 therapists and both did this sort of thing. Last minute cancellations and the likes, for simple things like “my webcam isn’t working” - so ring me then? It’s a lack of compassion in a field that really needs it that blows my mind.

What if id been on the edge? And that tipped me over?

I firmly believe these people have no idea what it’s actually like to suffer from poor mental health.
 
Tell me about it. When my care coordinator was off they sent a nurse that basically laughed at me and told me to go into the woods and scream. Also many cancelled appointments because I was living quite far away. Also the cbt nurse was a waste of time.

I only got decent care when I was in hospital in the psychiatric ward.
 
Not sure if I mentioned this before, but I would like to mention my experience with panic attacks.

They started in my teens at family events I was forced to go to, but more notably was when I was at uni and tried attending my first social event on my own.

One of the people on my course was having his birthday party at the student union, and he knew I lived on campus so was like 'I know you live in halls so its only like a minute away from you, so you can come'. He was right ofc and I turned up.

When I got there, I say the person's whose bday it was, greeted him, but noticed he had bought all his family and personal friends from outside of uni, so I went and sat down on my own as I didn't know any of them. I looked around for anyone from my course, but it looked like I was the only person who had actually bothered to show up.

In less than 5 minutes I started getting hot flushes, raised temperature, panic and hyperventilation because my brain was like 'you look like a right idiot just sat there on your own in front of everyone' and I had to leave.

This repeated in any social situation where I was either alone, or simply if people who O didn't know were looking at me, which then led to me becoming a shut in.
 
Thank you for all the kind replies and condolences guys - we're headed off this weekend (booked last year) for 10 days off grid just getting away from it all.

I will see how I am doing when we get back and will contact my GP if needs be.

Failing that I'm just going to give this time and see how things progress - ty also @Lysander for the Kubler-Ross link dude.

It's all appreciated guys.
 
Had a ton of problems in my younger years. They sent me for help but the guy working for the NHS was impossible to understand, i think he was from Africa or somewhere and i just couldnt make out a word he said so i quit after one session.

Only thing that worked was living a basic lifestyle, no drink, no fags, no parties no nothing
 
An update on my own situation: my errant therapist has returned. I now have an appointment for Monday, we'll see how it goes but I'm half expecting everything to be cancelled at short notice from now on. Also my GP has referred me for psychiatry, we're waiting for that referral to be processed. I've been prescribed antidepressants, but I'm nervous about taking them, but it's nice to know they're there.

Sonea Fifer said:
Thank you for all the kind replies and condolences guys - we're headed off this weekend (booked last year) for 10 days off grid just getting away from it all.

I will see how I am doing when we get back and will contact my GP if needs be.

Failing that I'm just going to give this time and see how things progress - ty also @Lysander for the Kubler-Ross link dude.

It's all appreciated guys.
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Yes, taking a break - even though booked last year - is a good idea, and good timing.

Book with your GP if you find things hard long-term. One of the best moves I made in 2019 was seeing my GP because of mental health issues. I think as a guy it's extra hard because there's a social stigma for you to "man up" but that's counterproductive in the long term [and meaningless]. It actually takes more effort to admit that things are difficult and to go and get help, but once you're over that line you'll wonder why everyone doesn't do it.

Good luck and have a good time away.
 
Sorry to hear your news @Sonea Fifer :( *hugs*

My mental health isn't doing too great and along with physical problems that I really should post about sometime I've now been off work for 7.5 months and yesterday had my contract terminated. Bittersweet as I've been at that job for 17.5 years but also it was only retail so swings and roundabouts I guess? Still processing what that means for me going forward (besides lack of money!) so just a bit shellshocked for lack of a better term?
 
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dave28 said:
Had a ton of problems in my younger years. They sent me for help but the guy working for the NHS was impossible to understand, i think he was from Africa or somewhere and i just couldnt make out a word he said so i quit after one session.

Only thing that worked was living a basic lifestyle, no drink, no fags, no parties no nothing
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no parties? I can understand the drink and cigarettes but why no parties?
 
Bassmansam said:
no parties? I can understand the drink and cigarettes but why no parties?
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To keep even, like no big highs or lows type of thing. Party can mean anything though, a party with family celebrating something is fine but im talking more about going to clubs / festivals or whatever having a blast for half the night
 
TBF I get this - if I have too much fun I get (what I presume to be) serotonin burnout. Feel all the happy feelings and then 4-5 days later wonder why I can't seem to feel good about anything. It's a long enough gap that it took me a while to realise the connection.

I don't have to drink or intoxicate myself either, it can happen from a sober extended session of happy company like a birthday party. I've always had a bittersweet feeling during parties even as a kid, I think it's related.
 
Sonea Fifer said:
I have viewed, and read this thread so many times and each time I have thought I have nothing substantial to add that could help anyone . . .

Three days ago my father died.

I cry (a lot) when no one can see me - I don't know what to do, and I don't know how to fix this . . . .

My wife has been so supportive but I just feel, broken, like nothing can fix this.

Mental health is so ****** up and there is no quick fix and I don't know where to go from here but yeah we just keep going huh . . .
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I'm sorry for your loss. I understand how you feel.

I lost my Dad in Jan 2019 and it absolutely destroyed me mentally. There are no easy answers and its different for everyone. I would say, for me, it does get better, I know I am nowhere near my "normal" but I'm heading in right direction I hope. I tried counselling twice which helped as I generally don't like to share with people but somehow it was easier with a total stranger!?

Totally get the "broken" feel. I added "guilt" to my feelings for maybe not fully understanding how it was for my wife who has lost her father, mother and youngest brother in last 6-7 years.

My only tip would be to let it out, don't try to suppress how you feel. Vent if you need to. Talk if you CAN. Tell those close to you how it is for you so they understand.

Good luck!
 
Lysander said:
Between the two of us, my therapist and I have agreed that I have misophonia. We are now looking at treatment. She also says I have OCD, which is something of a shock, and I am getting my head around it.
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I get this a lot, it's like the sound is just jabbing me in the brain and trying to annoy me, to get a reaction. It's the only way I can describe it, but it's not always the same sounds, same situations,
 
AHarvey said:
I get this a lot, it's like the sound is just jabbing me in the brain and trying to annoy me, to get a reaction. It's the only way I can describe it, but it's not always the same sounds, same situations,
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I compiled a list of 49 cues that do it for me, at varying levels of effect from irritation to blind rage, including visual cues [things that, if you see them, remind you of the sound and trigger a reaction]. It's a spectrum. If you think you may have the same issue, speak to your GP. They will pay attention to you the greater emphasis you pay to severity and distress.
 
I asked for my ADHD performance test to be at 11am but the clinic haven't seen my message. So, have been nervously going through conversations in my head in case the phone does ring. Isn't anxiety brilliant :p
 
Ayahuasca said:
I wouldn't be too harsh on yourself with this, it's quite normal for people (even those without anxiety) to run conversations through their heads before things like this.
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Thanks :) Yes, it's just a killer combination isn't it! Being tested on my focus and concentration but waiting for the test throws my brain out of the window.
 
BallistixOnZ490 said:
I literally just filled in a whole bunch of questionnaires for both ASD and ADHD from 'Manygates provides a base for the Trust's attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and autism spectrum disorder (ASD) services.'
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I've never heard of manygates, I'm assuming they are a private entity, like I said, we shy away from private companies offering assesment as they are more often than not all too keen to give a diagnosis. The questionnaires you did would probably have been a 'connors'.

As for your last point, my current GP straight up admitted to me that only about 25% of patients referred for ASD / ADHD actually get seen, 75% are refused simply due to lack of funding, regardless of their needs or the law requiring that adults be able to access this testing. The 'understanding the criteria for diagnosis' part is something that every psychiatrist I have seen up until now don't understand themselves.
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Not getting seen due to lack of funding is nonsense, it's due to the lack of evidence to meet the criteria for diagnosis. GP's are absolutely clueless when it comes to ND assessment, anything they say should be taken with a huge pinch of salt, I deal with their referrals every working day.

I don't see what your psychiatrists don't understand the criteria, it's very simple, their should be evidence of the core impairments of ASD/ASHD in the associated behaviours of the person in question.

Also CAHMS and the rest of your post is for children right? That doesn't refute the point that I made that 'unless you are *diagnosed in childhood*, the NHS does everything it can to refuse a diagnosis'.
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Yes children, but I'm also involved with adult services, and I still refute your point, you say NHS like it's a single point of access, however every region is run by a different trust who have their own processes and procedures, they do not operate as one and differ dramatically.

Regardless, what would be in the NHS best interests to do everything it can to refuse diagnosis? Especially taking into account that independent NHS trusts operate independently and do NOT answer to the NHS, they answer to the local CCG who again like those trusts have different requirements in their given location.
 
JBeck said:
I've never heard of manygates, I'm assuming they are a private entity, like I said, we shy away from private companies offering assesment as they are more often than not all too keen to give a diagnosis. The questionnaires you did would probably have been a 'connors'.

single point of access, however every region is run by a different trust who have their own processes and procedures, they do not operate as one and differ dramatically.

Not getting seen due to lack of funding is nonsense

Regardless, what would be in the NHS best interests to do everything it can to refuse diagnosis? Especially taking into account that independent NHS trusts operate independently and do NOT answer to the NHS, they answer to the local CCG who again like those trusts have different requirements in their given location.
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1) Manygates - https://www.nhs.uk/services/clinics/services/service/defaultview.aspx?id=256500

2) Even NAS (National Autism Society) told me that most NHS psychiatrists use out of date criteria. Basically the older they are, the more clueless they are.

3) Most mental health services around West Yorkshire are actually called and operate under a name such as 'single point of access' lol. All mental health issues go through the same department, and all NHS mental heath services operate through that department.

4) Its in the NHS's best interest to refuse diagnostics / treatment / medications because all these things cost them a lot of money.

5) If clinics shut down due to a lack of funding, which a lot did, then you cannot be seen.

Let me guess you live in London where everything still seems to work?
 
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