Unmarried living together split after 18 years sorting finances

If anyone was interested, its going to court.. Despite there being 1.2 million involved he is going to represent himself!

her solicitor says she should stay in the joint home (it will help the court case) despite the fact he is hassling her all the time,

Solicitor seems confident she will get more than the legal split 50/50 of the 2 joint owned homes as well as a reasonable lump of the cash (especially since he was pocketing the rent from her sole owned property, the joined owned home, his sole owned home and 50% of her other (small) income)

She did not know about gas lighting she can see now what he has been doing to her
 
I think that's kind of the point, it is subtle coercion built up a long period of time (perhaps 18 years - think how much your life, your perspective, your values etc change in 18 years), making people question their memory, confidence, sanity etc. Small incremental things build up over time until they are being controlled.

If your partner came home one day and randomly locked you up in a jail cell for six hours, you'd notice. If if was just a 0.1% extension of normal life (perhaps moving an item of clothing to a different position in the wardrobe to begin with, then putting it away in a drawer some time later, you might not notice.
 
edscdk said:
If anyone was interested, its going to court.. Despite there being 1.2 million involved he is going to represent himself!
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That's hilarious, then again the way he'd been taking money off her and seemingly thought it was perfectly fine etc.. strongly suggested he was already rather deluded. Hope the court absolutely rinses him over this...
 
edscdk said:
If anyone was interested, its going to court.. Despite there being 1.2 million involved he is going to represent himself!

her solicitor says she should stay in the joint home (it will help the court case) despite the fact he is hassling her all the time,

Solicitor seems confident she will get more than the legal split 50/50 of the 2 joint owned homes as well as a reasonable lump of the cash (especially since he was pocketing the rent from her sole owned property, the joined owned home, his sole owned home and 50% of her other (small) income)

She did not know about gas lighting she can see now what he has been doing to her
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Oh dear, he's going to get reamed, and rightly so by the sound of it.
 
A minor update, she has changed solicitors twice, and in the current practise it been esculated to a more senior solicitor.. He refused to go to mediation so it's booked to go straight to court..

She is still being advised she needs to stay in the house until everything gis sorted..

The guy was abusing her dog and got bitten, she found some letter from an old flame of his and we now know he likes being pegged...

He paid off the last 30k of the mortgage to get the deeds which he has now hidden thinking that means the house is his.

He says as she has no kids he should have everything and she should walk away with nothing..

She caught him eating her dogs dog treats. He says he is malnourished and she is neglecting him (as she will not buy food or cook for him).

He is also fighting with his brother as his mum and dad died and split the money between the 3 siblings .. But for some reason he thinks he should have one of his brothers 3rd as well as his 3rd..
 
As I said 3 years ago in this thread - two sides to every story.....

Only winners are solicitors and lawyers.

Stay well out of it - Don't get involved in any way
 
edscdk said:
She caught him eating her dogs dog treats. He says he is malnourished and she is neglecting him (as she will not buy food or cook for him).
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200.webp
 
edscdk said:
A minor update, she has changed solicitors twice, and in the current practise it been esculated to a more senior solicitor.. He refused to go to mediation so it's booked to go straight to court..

She is still being advised she needs to stay in the house until everything gis sorted..

The guy was abusing her dog and got bitten, she found some letter from an old flame of his and we now know he likes being pegged...

He paid off the last 30k of the mortgage to get the deeds which he has now hidden thinking that means the house is his.

He says as she has no kids he should have everything and she should walk away with nothing..

She caught him eating her dogs dog treats. He says he is malnourished and she is neglecting him (as she will not buy food or cook for him).

He is also fighting with his brother as his mum and dad died and split the money between the 3 siblings .. But for some reason he thinks he should have one of his brothers 3rd as well as his 3rd..
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he sounds like a proper nob.
 
18 years (or 21 now)... I thought this would fall under common law marriage? (Edit: Surveyor pointed out that though this is wildly believed, common law marriage does not exist in the UK).

Also.. what a weird situation. You have to be some real kind of special to be with someone that long and think you don't split in some way. Also... having worked for the Land Registry I can tell you that 'hiding the deeds' doesn't mean anything lol.
 
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edscdk said:
he has also messed her up in the head by constantly belittling her so she has gone from someone capable of earning 70k a year to someone too scared to apply for a job.. he keeps a diary on everything she does, when she goes out, who she went to see
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He sounds like an absolutely ******
 
VincentHanna said:
He sounds like a maniac.

He eats dog treats because she doesn't cook for him? I thought they split up 3 years ago.
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he obviously has mental issues, he has 2 houses he owns our right, and 2 and are joint owned, his income is about 4000 a month after tax (rent + pension) and he has about 600,000 in shares,

he will eat rancid food, stale mouldy bread, dog food and the neighbours left over food that they drop off for the dogs

solicitor has said she needs to stay in the house to make the split / court case easier (for what ever reason)
 
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