The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

This thread always makes interesting reading I see where you are coming from rossi that it is not always the case but a lot of the time women love the chase and as soon as you stop they go nuts.

The same goes if they you date other women and you are no longer an option to them okay this may not be the case in your situation.
 
Chin up rossi, the job **** will sort itself out if you are doing your bit to fix the problem.
Hope whatever is going on with the family in hospital has the best outcome.
Anyway...

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Feeling absolutely ******* crushed today, my little lad aged 8 and daughter aged 6 both told me at seperate times that they feel like they don't get to spend any time with me because I'm always sleeping.

I see my kids every weekend and 50% of all holidays, but with working permanent nights I tend to sleep in till lunch time, on the weekends were I just have them for one day like today, I pick them up at 10am and then have to go to bed for 2hrs while my fiancee takes them to Karate etc. I'm working so damn hard, which I'm happy to do to support my family but when you're having to contemplate taking on even more hours because money is getting tighter and your kids say this to you it feels as if I've had my guts ripped out.

I've tried not sleeping as much, even not going back to bed at all but am then like an absolute zombie. I'm looking for a better job but its taking its time.
 
Night shift and kids really do not mix well, because you are on a permanent cycle that doesn't match their own waking hours. You're doing the right thing by looking for another job, just make sure they know / realise you are trying to change the situation.
 
Roar87 said:
Trust me, she doesn't know, when she does find out you'll know about it. Women are generally quite predictable with how they act in relationships and towards Men. They're attracted to specific behaviours and also turned off by specific behaviours, in the same way us Men are generally attracted to feminine behaviour and turned off by Women who act masculine.
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It might be a good idea to listen to what ROSSI is saying about his situation rather than classing all women in the rather reddit-like way you're doing. Just because you've met or been involved with dreadful women does not mean that they are all like that, thankfully.
 
[FnG]magnolia said:
It might be a good idea to listen to what ROSSI is saying about his situation rather than classing all women in the rather reddit-like way you're doing. Just because you've met or been involved with dreadful women does not mean that they are all like that, thankfully.
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I don't go on reddit and my experiences stem from a lot more than the handful of women I've been in relationships with
 
ci_newman said:
Night shift and kids really do not mix well, because you are on a permanent cycle that doesn't match their own waking hours. You're doing the right thing by looking for another job, just make sure they know / realise you are trying to change the situation.
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Yeah, am doing my best to make sure they know what's going on and that Daddy is looking for something better, its just so damn hard right now... My fiancee is struggling to find work but if she was able to get something I'd maybe able to drop my Friday night shift (only 4hrs) Midnight till 4am and then not be utterly wrecked on the Saturday. Problem is as it stands I can't afford to be down almost £50 a week.
 
Vidar said:
Yeah, am doing my best to make sure they know what's going on and that Daddy is looking for something better, its just so damn hard right now... My fiancee is struggling to find work but if she was able to get something I'd maybe able to drop my Friday night shift (only 4hrs) Midnight till 4am and then not be utterly wrecked on the Saturday. Problem is as it stands I can't afford to be down almost £50 a week.
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Good luck. I'm guessing you need to earn a certain amount to afford the child support. The irony of it is that by providing for your children financially, you're knackered and then they don't enjoy their time with and you're seen as the dad who doesn't want to spend quality time with them. This sort of thing drives me nuts. I hope you sort it out soon.
 
Hades said:
Good luck. I'm guessing you need to earn a certain amount to afford the child support. The irony of it is that by providing for your children financially, you're knackered and then they don't enjoy their time with and you're seen as the dad who doesn't want to spend quality time with them. This sort of thing drives me nuts. I hope you sort it out soon.
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Thank you mate, I really appreciate that...
 
My ex text me for the first time in over 2 months yesterday. For the first time I didn't get that pit in my stomach that I'd usually get when I hear from her, all I felt was anger that she decided to text to ask if she had seen me in my car over the weekend.
 
ChrisD. said:
My ex text me for the first time in over 2 months yesterday. For the first time I didn't get that pit in my stomach that I'd usually get when I hear from her, all I felt was anger that she decided to text to ask if she had seen me in my car over the weekend.
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Reply back "I'm sorry who is this? I don't recognise the number" :D :D :D
 
Think I'm going to jog this 23 year old on, always hot & cold. I was meant to be going to hers tonight or Thursday night, she didn't reply to me all of last night even though I said I would have needed to know to pack stuff etc. Always very flirty and chatty till the subject of seeing each other comes up. Even though she always says she wouldn't have driven to see me etc if she didn't want to meet up. So I think I'm going to call her bluff before the inevitable happens.
 
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ChrisD. said:
Think I'm going to jog this 23 year old on, always hot & cold. I was meant to be going to hers tonight or Thursday night, she didn't reply to me all of last night even thought I said I would have needed to know to pack stuff etc. Always very flirty and chatty till the subject of seeing each other comes up. Even though she always says she wouldn't have driven to see me etc if she didn't want to meet up. So I think I'm going to call her bluff before the inevitable happens.
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I would cut it off too. If she makes an effort to see you again after then you know she is interested. If not then you can move on and she's not wasting your time.
 
The issue I have is we speak via video call and she says she misses me and wants to see me, then particulars of meeting up come up she's well up for it, till the next day when we text and she just ignores the subject or takes ages to reply. Part of me thinks she just wants a ****, so tell me, I won't complain!
 
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