Human v Chimp fight

Screeeech said:
Nothing on earth other than humans with guns would threaten a fully grown Grizzly bear.
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Don't know about grizzlies specifically, but this Quora thread has some interesting references about lions vs lots of stuff. I was surprised to see that lions almost always get the better of Tigers (which I had thought were bigger), but also that they have the beating of eurasian bears, which they find easier to deal with than tigers.

https://www.quora.com/What-animal-d...-ancient-Rome-all-the-way-through-modern-Rome
 
SexyGreyFox said:
So you reckon if 100x 5 year olds come running at you at the same time you could take all of them out?
Probably about 10 before you are under a massive pile on.
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the more people there are the more they get in each others way. and odds are you punt the first couple in the face and a whole lot of the others would hesitate or bail after getting splashed w/ blood and teeth. those left, they're kids, not MMA fighters.
 
wolfie138 said:
the more people there are the more they get in each others way. and odds are you punt the first couple in the face and a whole lot of the others would hesitate or bail after getting splashed w/ blood and teeth. those left, they're kids, not MMA fighters.
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Any capable adult would only be limited by his own stamina in how many 5 year olds he could take out. 100 is a bare minimum.

He would tire before he was beaten.

Massive pile ons indicate some level of a coordinated attack. My 5 year old daughter struggles to negotiate a fork around her plate without getting it on the floor.
 
tracertong said:
A prime Mike Tyson could knock a chimp out.
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What a load of nonsense. Mike Tyson stands there trying to throw a punch and the chimp launches his whole body at Tyson's face and takes him down. You can't throw a punch whilst getting your face chewed at and your arm torn off. The chimp isn't going to stand there in a boxing stance waiting to get hit, it'll be all over him.
 
Scam said:
What a load of nonsense. Mike Tyson stands there trying to throw a punch and the chimp launches his whole body at Tyson's face and takes him down. You can't throw a punch whilst getting your face chewed at and your arm torn off. The chimp isn't going to stand there in a boxing stance waiting to get hit, it'll be all over him.
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well maybe you're assessment of Tyson is a load of nonsense. maybe he knows about chimps so throws it a banana and while it's happily distracted he sucker punches the hairy **** into next week.
 
wolfie138 said:
well maybe you're assessment of Tyson is a load of nonsense. maybe he knows about chimps so throws it a banana and while it's happily distracted he sucker punches the hairy **** into next week.
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I'd call that cheating. If this fight were to happen I think both parties should be on a level 'mental' playing field; in that they both know they are fighting to the death. That's the only true test...
 
Scam said:
What a load of nonsense. Mike Tyson stands there trying to throw a punch and the chimp launches his whole body at Tyson's face and takes him down. You can't throw a punch whilst getting your face chewed at and your arm torn off. The chimp isn't going to stand there in a boxing stance waiting to get hit, it'll be all over him.
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"...and takes him down", well a 50kg Chimp took a 100kg prime Mike Tyson down pretty easily then. I think you maybe don't realise that a Chimp is half his size, he could throw 50kg around for fun, hell I could do that when I was training 5 times a week and I was no where near as strong as him.
 
If one thing has surprised me about this thread it is just how many people had pre-existing expertise and knowledge of chimpanzees. Unless they're bluffing and have Google at their fingertips, that's quite surprising.
 
The_Abyss said:
If one thing has surprised me about this thread it is just how many people had pre-existing expertise and knowledge of chimpanzees. Unless they're bluffing and have Google at their fingertips, that's quite surprising.
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You know it has hit rock bottom when people are arguing like its fact about a retired fighter being able to knock a chimp out or not. So many variables and something that can never be tested but you know... my dads harder than your dad and all that.
 
Roar87 said:
"...and takes him down", well a 50kg Chimp took a 100kg prime Mike Tyson down pretty easily then. I think you maybe don't realise that a Chimp is half his size, he could throw 50kg around for fun, hell I could do that when I was training 5 times a week and I was no where near as strong as him.
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Maybe "takes him down" was not technically correct but I think even with his boxing prowess, Tyson (or any fighter) would struggle to keep the chimp out of his eyes/face/nuts etc. It's one thing to protect from a punch but quite another to protect from 4 strong flailing limbs going for every one of your most tender parts.
 
cheesyboy said:
Don't know about grizzlies specifically, but this Quora thread has some interesting references about lions vs lots of stuff. I was surprised to see that lions almost always get the better of Tigers (which I had thought were bigger), but also that they have the beating of eurasian bears, which they find easier to deal with than tigers.

https://www.quora.com/What-animal-d...-ancient-Rome-all-the-way-through-modern-Rome
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Hmm I always thought that even female tigers mess up lions. At least that's how it's been in zoos. Tigers are slightly larger and more powerful.

Not sure about the grizzly comment either. Polar bears are much larger heavier, and dependent on meat for survival. A full grown grizzly wouldn't even stand a chance against a full grown polar bear.
 
englishpremier said:
Not sure about the grizzly comment either. Polar bears are much larger heavier, and dependent on meat for survival. A full grown grizzly wouldn't even stand a chance against a full grown polar bear.
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Yeah I mean these comparisons are just for laughs really, they'd never encounter one another in nature, if they did somehow, they'd most likely steer clear, top predators don't normally fight each other unless they have to (offspring / territory) - you'd have to force them together in a confined space, so the whole comparison is just silly really.

Just for the lolz, if you took all land animals and put them together - I actually have no idea which would come out on top, I mean you have things like a large male Hippopotamus - they can weigh almost 2 tonnes, have inch thick hide and bite at over 2000 PSI, which is almost twice that of a Polar Bear. Then you have things like Saltwater Crocodiles, which are armoured like tanks, can weigh over a ton, and bite at almost 4000 PSI,

That's not considering all the big cats, which despite being smaller pound for pound, are the most skilful killers of all - 1m 25s;

 
Screeeech said:
Yeah I mean these comparisons are just for laughs really, they'd never encounter one another in nature, if they did somehow, they'd most likely steer clear, top predators don't normally fight each other unless they have to (offspring / territory) - you'd have to force them together in a confined space, so the whole comparison is just silly really.
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They typically don't overlap in territory either a grizzly is never going to go head to head with a gorilla as one lives in africa and the other in north america.

Chimps though: they'll win. Ever seen a documentary on chimps fighting amongst themselves? Its a whirlwind of bites, gouges and flailing arms and they're fast. Very fast. They can't keep it up for long (twitch muscles that tire easily whilst humans are built for stamina) but they wouldn't need to it'd all be over very quickly.
 
Roar87 said:
he could throw 50kg around for fun, hell I could do that when I was training 5 times a week and I was no where near as strong as him.
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Imagine everyone's surprise as doughy keyboard warrior reluctantly admits to not being as strong as Mike Tyson - one of the best boxers to ever live - in grudging internet stepdown. You couldn't make some of this stuff up :D
 
[FnG]MUGnolia said:
Imagine everyone's surprise as doughy keyboard warrior reluctantly admits to not being as strong as Mike Tyson - one of the best boxers to ever live - in grudging internet stepdown. You couldn't make some of this stuff up :D
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I mean I had a 202.5kg Deadlift and 160kg Squat, and I weighed 161lbs, Mike probably had better than my 105kg Bench Press though.
 
Tyson.jpg
 
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