I like the saying "It's war, deal with it" when it comes to the imbalances in the game...
All this 'I'd really like BF2 if only...', if we had all the 'if onlys' changed then it wouldn't be BF2! It'd be some other game. Either play it for what it is, warts and all, or play something else.
G36 if you can!
I've been playing with the 1.41 patch on Windows7, the BETA is too unstable and has too few servers.
I am surprised by the amount of servers that have mods that keep a track of what you're doing and what you can/cannot do in the game. It's a bit ridiculous, I like a good old vanilla server where the game mechanics work for themselves.
I also acquired BF2142, but with the latest patch, PB always kicks me for Unknown Windows API error 131152 and i am still waiting for EvenBalance to fix it.
By 'mods' I guess you mean AutoAdmins .... only advice is read server rules upon joining and watch for any warnings that way you avoid the old heave ho ie. kick
Sometimes I just want to break those rules on purpose because they're too limiting.