Asking someone where they are from

[danlightbulb]

Is that supposed to be a defence in her favour?

Not my job to defend her, just giving it as a possible explanation, of which there are many.

As I said earlier, what I don't like about this is the blame game, persecution and public flogging of the issue when no-one can guarantee the "victim's" motives either.

 

[Junglist]

Not my job to defend her, just giving it as a possible explanation, of which there are many.

As I said earlier, what I don't like about this is the blame game, persecution and public flogging of the issue when no-one can guarantee the "victim's" motives either.

Which if that was a possible explanation would be even worse "Oh, this black lady will clearly have dreadful English. I better dumb it down for her..."
Maybe the person who was offended motive was to just have a discussion and not be grilled about where they may or may not be from. I expect had she just accepted her first answer they probably could've went on and had a better conversation. But she didn't want to let it go. She had to find out where she is really from.

 

[Tony Edwards]

Or ignorant. I don’t think she is mildly racist, what she did was mildly racist.

She could still be mildly racist though.

 

[danlightbulb]

Which if that was a possible explanation would be even worse "Oh, this black lady will clearly have dreadful English. I better dumb it down for her..."
Maybe the person who was offended motive was to just have a discussion and not be grilled about where they may or may not be from. I expect had she just accepted her first answer they probably could've went on and had a better conversation. But she didn't want to let it go. She had to find out where she is really from.

Sure, poor judgement, but is it racist?

 

[Craterloads]

She could still be mildly racist though.

She could, I like to give people the benefit of doubt and given she is 83 years old I would tend to be more forgiving.

 

[Bassmansam]

She could still be mildly racist though.

Aren't most people midly something ist though?

She's not attractive enough i won't try to get with her. Attractivist
He is too short for me. Heightist
Hes got ginger hair so i'm not being friends with him. Gingerist
She earns minimum wage, she must be poor. Economist
To work in a Hollister shop you need to be attractive also, don't recall hearing a fuss kicking up about that?

you get the jist

 

[Tony Edwards]

Aren't most people midly something ist though?

She's not attractive enough i won't try to get with her. Attractivist
He is too short for me. Heightist
Hes got ginger hair so i'm not being friends with him. Gingerist
She earns minimum wage, she must be poor. Economist

you get the jist

I certainly do get your jist. But it isnt even remotely the same.

 

[Junglist]

Sure, poor judgement, but is it racist?

At the very least it's prejudiced if she thought that she should dumb down her language so that the black woman would understand her.

That's not the defence she's looking for.

 

[Demon]

I don't agree with using "your people" at all

Yes, "Your people" is completely different to "your heritage". One is implying she can only possibly be the nationality of her ancestors and cannot be considered British (n the context of the conversation this thread is about).

Also, what has the charity got to do with anything?

Not every charity caters for every possible problem/demographic/illness etc.

I also don't like the term ,,'your people', I just don't immediately jump to racism from that and can see what she is trying to get at,

If she said "Oh, and what heritage are you", I'd actually also find that odd, but not in context of the charity and not immediately jump to racism either.

You would need the person to then use that with a negative context applied.

In terms of the charity, just replace African and Carribean Heritage with 'of UK heritage' and see how that goes down..

 

[doodah]

 

[NVP]

I think people are analysing the phrase so hard they're forgetting the context of the conversation.


Without meaning anything more than simply providing info; I think your people is common parlance in pidgin English, something of which this lady may have been used to using when conversations became confused in the past.

 

[dowie]

The use of the word 'really' is one of those words that can have condescending tones if used in a certain way. I.e it implies you don't believe the person, or its a word that implies exaggeration or extension of the underlying phrase. There is probably a more accurate dictionary mechanism here that describes this better than I am.

We can all agree the question was asked poorly, but is SH racist?

All we've got to go on is a several-line recollection, we don't know for sure the exact wording used. I don't think there is much point debating "really" and "your people" etc.. when we don't know for sure that was actually said.

She likely has made some form of faux pas and upset this particular guest but this guest is absolutely milking it too and coming out with some disingenuous claims - like she claimed she didn't want to name the official but she'd already given her position and initials which was more than enough to identify her etc. she's also seemingly not a fan of the Royal Family anyway given a couple of her previous tweets.

 

[danlightbulb]

At the very least it's prejudiced if she thought that she should dumb down her language so that the black woman would understand her.

That's not the defence she's looking for.

If she does that everyday with foreign people though at these sorts of events, and so that's what she is used to doing, then it might be still a bad thing to do but it is EXPLAINABLE?

Its so easy to pick on one specific faux par, which is what you and others are doing. How about focus on the factors that might be in play here instead of jumping into a specific conclusion. Is what she did racist - we will never truly know. Is it explainable in many different possible scenarios of what went on - yes, and only one of those scenarios is racist, there are a hundred others which are innocent.

 

[Tony Edwards]

The answer to the great question — “where did our species come from?” — has long been Africa. It was from somewhere in the African continent, most scientists believe, that modern humans evolved around 200,000 years ago before spreading across the world and becoming the dominant species we are today.

I am afraid racists dont believe that.

 

[danlightbulb]

I am afraid racists dont believe that.

Racism has never been about where someone is from per se. Its about the impact that they might have (actual or perceived) on the person's home country or individual lifestyle.

 

[Tony Edwards]

Racism has never been about where someone is from per se. Its about the impact that they might have (actual or perceived) on the person's home country or individual lifestyle.

eh?

 

[danlightbulb]

eh?

eh?

Im saying that a racist person doesn't hate a country or peoples specifically for its own sake, they are racist because of the impact (actual or perceived) on the people of that country coming here and believed to effect, dilute or otherwise alter their home country.

A racist person doesn't 'hate' Pakistan or Pakistani people. They 'hate' those people coming here and influencing life here.

 

[Nitefly]

If she does that everyday with foreign people though at these sorts of events, and so that's what she is used to doing, then it might be still a bad thing to do but it is EXPLAINABLE?

Its so easy to pick on one specific faux par, which is what you and others are doing. How about focus on the factors that might be in play here instead of jumping into a specific conclusion. Is what she did racist - we will never truly know. Is it explainable in many different possible scenarios of what went on - yes, and only one of those scenarios is racist, there are a hundred others which are innocent.

I suppose it depends on what 'racist' really means and whether you believe you can be racist without being malicious or intending harm.

Can you be racist without being malicious or intending to cause harm? I think so, yes. You could do this by treating someone in a specific way because of their ethnic appearance, if you're not mindful and respectful.

Here, it comes across as if the person asking the question on ethnicity is prioritising their personal curiosity above the other's wish to withhold their personal information as to themselves. It's insensitive and I'm not surprised that it got a negative reaction.

 

[Tony Edwards]

I suppose it depends on what 'racist' really means and whether you believe you can be racist without being malicious or intending harm.

Can you be racist without being malicious or intending to cause harm? I think so, yes. You could do this by treating someone in a specific way because of their ethnic appearance, if you're not mindful and respectful.

Here, it comes across as if the person asking the question on ethnicity is prioritising their personal curiosity above the other's wish to withhold their personal information as to themselves. It's insensitive and I'm not surprised that it got a negative reaction.

Thank you. This is what is happening in this thread in a nutshell.

 

[danlightbulb]

Here, it comes across as if the person asking the question on ethnicity is prioritising their personal curiosity above the other's wish to withhold their personal information as to themselves. It's insensitive and I'm not surprised that it got a negative reaction.

Perhaps SH is just a rude insensitive person in general? We don't know her so we don't know.