Corrupt a wish

Bes said:
I wish I was a little bit taller....
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you get an inch taller every day... for the rest of your life. after just a month you are so freakishly tall that you are dissected by the US govt. because they suspect alien intervention.

i wish i had a nice girlfriend...
 
orderoftheflame said:
Granted. You're also blind, deaf and dumb.

I wish I wasn't so tired.
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Granted. You're so incredibly, permanently awake. So awake in fact that you cannot get to sleep. That doesn't stave off the effects of sleep deprivation, however, you find yourself not being able to concentrate after a couple of days. Eventually your diminished attention span and impaired ability to reason drive you utterly insane.

I wish I wish I was a fish.
 
sigma said:
Granted. You get nothing but poo in the face for 24 days.

I wish for a bar of gold.
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Granted but you send it to postmygivemebuggeralformygold.com by RM 2nd class standard and it gets lost in the post. You take RM to court, there's a long legal battle which you lose and you're having to sell your body three times a day for the next 20 years to pay back their legal costs. You get caught in Clapham Common toilets and are arrested, imprisoned with a large hairy biker of the homo variety and three times ends up being six.

I wish i could read the correct page of this thread.
 
JoeMama said:
Granted but you send it to postmygivemebuggeralformygold.com by RM 2nd class standard and it gets lost in the post. You take RM to court, there's a long legal battle which you lose and you're having to sell your body three times a day for the next 20 years to pay back their legal costs. You get caught in Clapham Common toilets and are arrested, imprisoned with a large hairy biker of the homo variety and three times ends up being six.

I wish i could read the correct page of this thread.
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You read the correct page, but before you can post a reply a whole extra page of replies are posted.

I wish I had a better car.
 
JoeMama said:
Granted but you already have the best car you'll ever own.

I wish i could get some sleep.
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You get your wish but you have a Barbie doll inserted up your anus every time you full into a deep sleep:)

I wish my sister's ex husband would spontaneously combust:).
 
he does spontaneously combust but does so in your living room covering the entire room in gore that can never ever be cleaned up :D

i wish i had a cure for my insomnia :(
 
ryujinjakka said:
he does spontaneously combust but does so in your living room covering the entire room in gore that can never ever be cleaned up :D

i wish i had a cure for my insomnia :(
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Granted, you are narcoleptic.

I wish I could go on a shopping spree (courtesy of Mr Spie) at OcUK.
 
Granted, but it now has the same effect on you as water!

I wish the 3 and a half our drive I have to do today goes quickly!
 
And are then all found to be using performance enhancing drugs and are disgraced and stripped of the title.

i wish i could invent something that would revolutionize the world.
 
Kanifee said:
And are then all found to be using performance enhancing drugs and are disgraced and stripped of the title.

i wish i could invent something that would revolutionize the world.
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Granted, you will invent the thought pill and people will hate you because they will be able to read each other's minds.

I wish I could go on the last Space Shuttle.
 
simulatorman said:
Granted, you will invent the thought pill and people will hate you because they will be able to read each other's minds.

I wish I could go on the last Space Shuttle.
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Granted, when you die your family pays a small fee to send your ashes into space where they are scattered and then float into the sun.

I wish the whole world was edible like charlie and the chocolate factory.
 
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