Dealing with Cancer

It is heartbreaking hearing all the stories. Unfortunately for me my father finally got his diagnosis about 3 weeks ago, Motor Neurone Disease. The day after he couldn't get up and has been in hospital since.

Getting the diagnosis was truly devastating, as up to that point you could hold out hope that there may be something that can be done. With MND it is a terminal illness, there are no drugs or treatments that can slow or stop the progress of the disease. At the moment my dad cannot independently move his right leg, has to use his arms to move it, his left leg can be raised barely 5/10cm off the floor, is slowly losing dexterity in his right hand as the disease starts to take effect on his upper body. Due to the lack of use of the legs they have swollen up and his feet have swollen up an extra 3 shoe sizes.

I spent Fathers Day filling out the paperwork on Power of Attorney so that myself and my sister can make Health/Welfare/Financial/Property decisions for when the time comes that he can no longer sign or make the decisions.

If I am honest I am not ok, holding so much anger at the whole situation, helplessness at watching someone you love just waste away, frustration at how quickly it has ravaged him. My wife has been brilliant throughout and the people around me keep checking. It helps to talk and put these thoughts down in text.
 
Jester* said:
It is heartbreaking hearing all the stories. Unfortunately for me my father finally got his diagnosis about 3 weeks ago, Motor Neurone Disease. The day after he couldn't get up and has been in hospital since.

Getting the diagnosis was truly devastating, as up to that point you could hold out hope that there may be something that can be done. With MND it is a terminal illness, there are no drugs or treatments that can slow or stop the progress of the disease. At the moment my dad cannot independently move his right leg, has to use his arms to move it, his left leg can be raised barely 5/10cm off the floor, is slowly losing dexterity in his right hand as the disease starts to take effect on his upper body. Due to the lack of use of the legs they have swollen up and his feet have swollen up an extra 3 shoe sizes.

I spent Fathers Day filling out the paperwork on Power of Attorney so that myself and my sister can make Health/Welfare/Financial/Property decisions for when the time comes that he can no longer sign or make the decisions.

If I am honest I am not ok, holding so much anger at the whole situation, helplessness at watching someone you love just waste away, frustration at how quickly it has ravaged him. My wife has been brilliant throughout and the people around me keep checking. It helps to talk and put these thoughts down in text.
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I am so sorry to hear that :(

No words can help, however do everything you can to ensure you have no regrets, thats the most important thing.. And whilst you can sort out any legal crap early, i was left losing my home and having my dads entire estate taken by his wife of 11 months... Salt in the wound but to be honest i really couldn't care any less now... Losing my dad completley overwhelmed that.
 
So today at 10:10am my dads cancer journey ended.
his pain had ramped up but the nurses came to the house and made him comfy and he went in his sleep in the end.
rest in peace my lovely dad: 1944-2019 xxx
 
movingtables said:
So today at 10:10am my dads cancer journey ended.
his pain had ramped up but the nurses came to the house and made him comfy and he went in his sleep in the end.
rest in peace my lovely dad: 1944-2019 xxx
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Sorry to hear this mate, My thoughts are with you and your family :(
 
movingtables said:
So today at 10:10am my dads cancer journey ended.
his pain had ramped up but the nurses came to the house and made him comfy and he went in his sleep in the end.
rest in peace my lovely dad: 1944-2019 xxx
Click to expand...

I am very sorry for your loss mate, if you need any advice on what comes next feel free to ask. It can be very daunting.
 
So sorry to hear Movingtables.

In a dreadful addition to this thread my father was meant to be being discharged into home care Tuesday.

But Sunday morning his blood sodium levels dropped off a cliff and had to be sedated to administer treatment. After about 10 hours of watching him fight as his blood CO2 levels increased as his breathing started to suffer and the underlying MND took its toll. In the few lucid moments we had with him he asked us to let him go, and we asked the nurses to stop attempting to treat the sodium/CO2 levels while making him comfortable and changed sedative. Within 30 minutes he passed away at 12:18 this morning.

He will be missed. This is all I can bare to type right now, but I feel I need to type something.
 
Dam this thread got me right in the feelz.

Sorry for both your losses. I know we all have to go at some point but it's wrenching to read the stories.
 
Jester* said:
So sorry to hear Movingtables.

In a dreadful addition to this thread my father was meant to be being discharged into home care Tuesday.

But Sunday morning his blood sodium levels dropped off a cliff and had to be sedated to administer treatment. After about 10 hours of watching him fight as his blood CO2 levels increased as his breathing started to suffer and the underlying MND took its toll. In the few lucid moments we had with him he asked us to let him go, and we asked the nurses to stop attempting to treat the sodium/CO2 levels while making him comfortable and changed sedative. Within 30 minutes he passed away at 12:18 this morning.

He will be missed. This is all I can bare to type right now, but I feel I need to type something.
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ahh sorry to hear that m8. it's an indescribable brick in stomach feeling isn't it.
 
Thanks to all who have replied and continue to reply.
just had the funeral director visit us at home to discuss matters.
got the death certificate yesterday and will register the death on Thursday.
 
movingtables said:
Spot on mate I'm the same
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I lost my mum very quickly end of march, it gets better but don't be surprised if it just comes over you at the most random times, I can be sat in work and suddenly get the worst sense of sadness then 10 minutes later I am fine. its apparently perfectly normal but it doesn’t feel like it at the time.
 
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