Interesting correlation between some of the most ardent Brexit supporters on OCuk and people saying they've got no friends (and are happy with the situation). I guess that makes sense!
Does anyone else have no friends?
- Thread starter AHarvey
- Start date
Low blow if I might say so myself.
The is a reason and its called intelligence and thoughtful thinking. Us loners see the world for what it is, and not through another persons experience, lies deceptions etc.
We are not impressionable or take habits, cues or thinking from others.
As my nan always said "Its the quiet ones you need to watch!"
I don't have 'no friends' but the number of people that I socialise with on a frequent basis is very, very small. I would guess there will have been some occasions where a month has passed without me directly communicating with any of them.
The one saving grace is I can pick up the phone to my best friend ask talk for an hour as if nothing has changed, we slip very easily back into conversation. I guess that's the sign of a true friendship.
The slightly weird thing now is with social media I kind of 'follow the lives' of a few what I suppose would have to be called 'former friends', we might comment on each other's post every now and then but never arrange to meet up or whatever.
The one saving grace is I can pick up the phone to my best friend ask talk for an hour as if nothing has changed, we slip very easily back into conversation. I guess that's the sign of a true friendship.
The slightly weird thing now is with social media I kind of 'follow the lives' of a few what I suppose would have to be called 'former friends', we might comment on each other's post every now and then but never arrange to meet up or whatever.
I have 3 or 4 close friends. I see at least 2 or 3 of them a couple of Fridays a month when we go for a few pints.
I have known these guys from college 20 years ago and always kept in touch one way or another. We message each other in a hangouts group most days, just sending links and random stuff we are all interested in. I am married and love my wife to bits but it would be a lonelier existence not to have my mates too. I think it's far more difficult to make friends when you get older as you will never have those life experiences with them like you do growing up.
I have known these guys from college 20 years ago and always kept in touch one way or another. We message each other in a hangouts group most days, just sending links and random stuff we are all interested in. I am married and love my wife to bits but it would be a lonelier existence not to have my mates too. I think it's far more difficult to make friends when you get older as you will never have those life experiences with them like you do growing up.
I don't really see anyone during the week when I'm working. I don't generally socialise with my work friends as I like to get away from work when I'm done. People in my football team I'll have a drink with after a game but don't really socialise with them outside of football.
My close friends, I pretty much see 1/2 of them weekly and another couple I'll see at least monthly. Everyone's off doing their own thing these days, work commitments, partner commitments etc. I still keep in contact with quite a few friends over text/calls even if I'm not seeing them and we do have WhatsApp groups knocking about. The main interaction I have with people, or rather certain people is through gaming and over the internet, which tbh I still class as real friends.
My close friends, I pretty much see 1/2 of them weekly and another couple I'll see at least monthly. Everyone's off doing their own thing these days, work commitments, partner commitments etc. I still keep in contact with quite a few friends over text/calls even if I'm not seeing them and we do have WhatsApp groups knocking about. The main interaction I have with people, or rather certain people is through gaming and over the internet, which tbh I still class as real friends.
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I have no friends.
Monday to Friday
My typical days is get up at 6am, look after my son till work, come home from work, do odd jobs around the house and then get son to bed then watch tv or go on the PC
weekends
spend time with son and wife then repeat the above!
Monday to Friday
My typical days is get up at 6am, look after my son till work, come home from work, do odd jobs around the house and then get son to bed then watch tv or go on the PC
weekends
spend time with son and wife then repeat the above!
Sadly it's fairly normal these days, people are constantly moving and changing jobs so it makes it increasingly difficult for those that are not very sociable and even those that are not.
Personally I distanced myself away from many "friends" as they only even contacted me when they needed something.
Personally I distanced myself away from many "friends" as they only even contacted me when they needed something.
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Soldato
- Joined
- 21 Apr 2007
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- 6,631
I had a lot of friends / acquaintances at uni.
Left uni lost contact with them all, aside odd chat on facebook now and again.
Now days late 20's I have a handful of close friends. Not many though.
Left uni lost contact with them all, aside odd chat on facebook now and again.
Now days late 20's I have a handful of close friends. Not many though.
Soldato
- Joined
- 13 May 2003
- Posts
- 9,112
This is me. I have moved house more times than I care to mention, I have moved job location 5 times in the last 15 years. I probably have no-one I would consider a genuine friend at present and haven't for a few years. In my previous job I had a few colleagues whom I would call friends but relocation and work makes staying in touch tough. I also had good friends at previous rugby clubs but I'm 100 miles away from there now. Throw in a young family and that can be upgraded to impossible. I have relatives who have lived in the same town their entire lives and have wide circles of friends I have moved and have had fewer. Modern life is undoubtedly making it much more difficult.
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I've got close acquaintances. People I'd constantly play games with/meet up twice a year, some of them you would call friends...
I don't think I've got any close friends, the ones you'd take a bullet/give up a kidney for these days, just because how life changes. People move away, work different times/different places and you gradually drift away..
I don't think I've got any close friends, the ones you'd take a bullet/give up a kidney for these days, just because how life changes. People move away, work different times/different places and you gradually drift away..
Soldato
- Joined
- 17 Jun 2012
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- 9,898
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- South Wales
Having friends when your young is easy, everyone lives very close, have loads of spare time and you usually want to get out the house anyway. But when you grow up, then I think you need to work to keep your friendship. Now you don't have the time to see people often, they might live away, they might have a family to look after etc. I often find that people who don't have friends never put the effort into their prior friendships to keep them and they eventually drift away. I know I was guilty of this when old friends went to uni.
Moving to a new country and I'm finding it harder to make friends out of work. I work with a lot of younger people and whilst they accept me there's no real friendships lol.
The older swedes are all pretty much mental, good to talk to and kill time with but I wouldn't trust them to boil me an egg.
The older swedes are all pretty much mental, good to talk to and kill time with but I wouldn't trust them to boil me an egg.
Social media has done the opposite, instead of bringing people together it has made people lonely, for some desperate ones, fishing for likes to give their self esteem a boost. Totally tragic. If you jack in facebook you generally make more of an effort to be in touch with others in real life. I binned FB a while ago and have more contact now with others and it is much better. Can't believe it took me so long to spot that FB was wasting my time and energy.
Its the curse of social media. Same with internet dating (not knocking the people who try it) But they are plenty now who would rather sit in front of a screen all day searching for "the one" instead of making the effort to physically meet people.
forums like this have the same effect too, you're online too much and not going out the house.
today i'm fine because i was with my friends at work all weekend, but on thursday i'll be feeling lonely again, the way around this is to work friday as well.
Caporegime
- Joined
- 30 Jul 2013
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- 30,054
Doesn't surprise me.
Personally speaking, I was at a BBQ at the weekend with about 20 of my friends. Some I hadn't seen for 6 months, other I'd been out with the week before.
5 of them are friends from secondary school, and we're mid 30's now.
I never actually arrange social events, but I get invited to lots of stuff.
Associate
- Joined
- 1 Jul 2009
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- 728
- Location
- Shropshire/Paris
All people want to do is drink, talk about football and have 'banter'..no thanks I'll stick to having no friends because all that stuff bores me to tears.
Those are the best ones, shows your friends still want you around.
So what would your rather talk about? (I hate football too by the way
)
Caporegime
- Joined
- 30 Jul 2013
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- 30,054
Not the case at all, and most of my friends are big football fans.
When it comes up, I just move on and talk to somebody else
As for drinking, years ago maybe but no so much now.
The whole point of friends is that you have some shared interests.
3 of my friends I play Boardgames with
A few of them are video gamers
Most of my friends are, broadly speaking, in to the same sorts of music
Some have kids. Some don't.
Some like movies, some don't.
There's always some common link otherwise you wouldn't be friends.
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