I'm going to build a space station

Don’t ask how but we have acquired some cases of Romulan Ale which will be served this afternoon and evening in the "Happiness" bar. For those of you on duty we will be serving Green Alien Mocktails all day long.

Commander Massage
 
Greetings,

Apologies for not replying to you sooner simulatorman, your issue was dealt with and my team successfully found the missing person in the weapons section of the ship, about to perform an act of suicide. My team managed to prevent her from doing this and she is now having regular therapy sessions to help her. I heard this morning that she is recovering well and is looking forward to being out and about again.

All other security issues have been dealt with, however I must stress that Section C of Deck 3 is currently out of bounds to everyone - this is due to maintenance work on the flooring and should anyone try to gain access to this area, then they will suffer a very long fall and most likely kill themselves!

Hope everybody is having a good time,

Maccy
Head of Security
Onboard phone no: 77-999
 
All is good in navigation, aside from a small fault not allowing us to plot courses, so we are working off our 24/7 Pilots next-gen mind based navi system..

Eta for working TimTim-Nav is 4 hours, 17 mins.
 
Reetoong-durka dala Jimmeh Timmeh.. Velna carabatz.

## The imperial Reetoong, inbound through closed-space transit, is requesting permission to enter spacestation space. ##
 
To celebrate our first week in orbit, we will are staging a gala evening in the “Android” bar, the lovely ladies from Krikkitatitty will be performing the cabaret.

Lamuella punch will be served, the only alcoholic drink in the universe that doesn’t give a hangover.

So come and party at 21:00.

Commander Massage
 
simulatorman said:
Don’t ask how but we have acquired some cases of Romulan Ale which will be served this afternoon and evening in the "Happiness" bar. For those of you on duty we will be serving Green Alien Mocktails all day long.

Commander Massage
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Hey that was my romulan ale I was using it for...erm... "research purposes" ...yeah thats right... "research purposes".
 
message:
Trumpet station sensors grill victims and windscreen shield report three gargantuan moo moths, an armada of cup handle box flies, sixteen interstellar flotating bird turds and one mixematosis wabbit. Cleaning team despatched.
 
Solaris said:
Access codes are blatently 1234... something you'd use on your suitcase ;)
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1..2..3..4? Thats a stupid combination! What kind of idiot would use that?

darkhelmet.jpg
 
I am pleased to announce that another zombie attack has been thwarted. This one originated from the kitchens where some of the meals began to mutate. One "red shirt" was injured significantly due to eating the food and we are experimenting with implants to heal him. I would ask all staff not to stare or fear the cyBorg.

Resulting from this I would like to ask all staff to remember to wash their hands after going to the deck 3 cubicles and not to put things through the cubicle wall holes. I have been assured those holes are for maintenance purposes only. Anyone caught utilsiing them without appropriate glory hole clearance will be given a yellow card.

Thankyou!
 
gord said:
I am pleased to announce that another zombie attack has been thwarted. This one originated from the kitchens where some of the meals began to mutate. One "red shirt" was injured significantly due to eating the food and we are experimenting with implants to heal him. I would ask all staff not to stare or fear the cyBorg.

Resulting from this I would like to ask all staff to remember to wash their hands after going to the deck 3 cubicles and not to put things through the cubicle wall holes. I have been assured those holes are for maintenance purposes only. Anyone caught utilsiing them without appropriate glory hole clearance will be given a yellow card.

Thankyou!
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Do we know when the standard issue shotguns for protection from zombies will arrive?
 
Munkyman said:
Your request has been noted and i am assured there will be a large shipment of Yorkshire Tea due for arrival in the near future.

Yours

Munkyman (Head Tea Maker)
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Has the Tea shipment arrived yet I'm down to my last bag which has been re-used 3 times already

P.S: I Hope the rest of the crew Enjoyed their Easter Shoreleave I spent mine on a small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse
 
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