Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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"Hi, how are you?" works just fine as a first message.
If you get a reply saying "Hey, I'm good thanks and you?" then that means she likes your face and then you can proceed to start a proper conversation and ask more questions in your reply.
 
I officially have a girlfriend now :D. :(

We exchanged 'vows' this afternoon. E.g 'Leave the ladies alone Jay'.

So I'm out of the dating game now till .... well ..... :D

Grudas, North London is all yours son. Do me proud!
 
Grrr what is with the little effort girls put into their replies!?!? :S
I'm not asking deep meaning of life questions, just something light hearted that isn't run of the mill. I can have more engaging conversations with myself! ^^
 
Gzero said:
I'm not asking deep meaning of life questions, just something light hearted that isn't run of the mill. I can have more engaging conversations with myself! ^^
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Haha, I can identify with that. :)

After giving up on the idea of dating for now, I've pulled my thumb out of my anus and now have certification exams scheduled. That's sorted out all my free time for the next few months - studying like a demon! Definitely can't say I'm bored anymore...
 
Gzero said:
Grrr what is with the little effort girls put into their replies!?!? :S
I'm not asking deep meaning of life questions, just something light hearted that isn't run of the mill. I can have more engaging conversations with myself! ^^
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Precisely why I no longer bother. With the girls on dating sites, it quite often is a one way conversation. You mail them a paragraph of text that sounds like a lot of effort has been put into it and what do they do? Send you a one word reply back. Most of them are just fishing for compliments. How do I know this? Send them a message saying they're beautiful and they reply back saying 'Aww, thanks you're so nice'.

Here's one, sent a really long winded message about similar interests we shared and elaborated on them etc. I honestly thought it was one of my best, cracked quite a few jokes in it too. Anyways submitted the message came back the next day to check, no reply. Then I thought why not experiment, so I sent her another message this time saying along the lines 'You sound spoilt and you aren't as amazing as you think' (she had mentioned quite a few times in her profile that she knows or should I say thinks she is the ultimate woman and how she loves boys treating her like a 'princess'). Interesting this time as I got a reply in under 5 minutes, mouthing me off like she had all the time in the world. Infact she sent me a further 3 messages after the first one. Why didn't she spend that time actually trying to have a conversation when people actually put effort into their messages?
 
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PraxxtorCruel said:
Precisely why I no longer bother. With the girls on dating sites, it quite often is a one way conversation. You mail them a paragraph of text that sounds like a lot of effort has been put into it and what do they do? Send you a one word reply back. Most of them are just fishing for compliments. How do I know this? Send them a message saying they're beautiful and they reply back saying 'Aww, thanks you're so nice'.

Here's one, sent a really long winded message about similar interests we shared and elaborated on them etc. I honestly thought it was one of my best, cracked quite a few jokes in it too. Anyways submitted the message came back the next day to check, no reply. Then I thought why not experiment, so I sent her another message this time saying along the lines 'You sound spoilt and you aren't as amazing as you think' (she had mentioned quite a few times in her profile that she knows or should I say thinks she is the ultimate woman and how she loves boys treating her like a 'princess'). Interesting this time as I got a reply in under 5 minutes, mouthing me off like she had all the time in the world. Infact she sent me a further 3 messages after the first one. Why didn't she spend that time actually trying to have a conversation when people actually put effort into their messages?
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lol exactly chap. It's one of the many reasons I stopped bothering with online dating. They are like a breeding ground of self-righteous women. I joined that OK cupid as an experiment, and the site tells you if they are ones who reply or not. I just laughed when I saw 90% had been labelled "Replies selectively" or "Replies very selectively"

If you want to keep sending well thought out messages that take time to construct, only to be ignored then by all means good luck, but it's just not worth the time and effort in my opinion. It was all too forced for me, let things happen naturally :)
 
PraxxtorCruel said:
Here's one, sent a really long winded message about similar interests we shared and elaborated on them etc. I honestly thought it was one of my best, cracked quite a few jokes in it too. Anyways submitted the message came back the next day to check, no reply. Then I thought why not experiment, so I sent her another message this time saying along the lines 'You sound spoilt and you aren't as amazing as you think' (she had mentioned quite a few times in her profile that she knows or should I say thinks she is the ultimate woman and how she loves boys treating her like a 'princess'). Interesting this time as I got a reply in under 5 minutes, mouthing me off like she had all the time in the world. Infact she sent me a further 3 messages after the first one. Why didn't she spend that time actually trying to have a conversation when people actually put effort into their messages?
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Conclusion: this girl wasn't interested in you but is willing to defend herself from insults.

What's wrong with that?
 
ljt said:
I just laughed when I saw 90% had been labelled "Replies selectively" or "Replies very selectively"
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Out of the hundreds of guys who message them, why on Earth would a girl NOT be selective or very selective about who they reply to? Are you under some misguided notion that just because you send a well thought-out, articulated message that a girl is under some obligation to reply, even if she has no interest in you whatsoever? If I was a girl I would be exactly the same, I wouldn't have the time or inclination to reply to every message, only those that took my interest.

It's a common reaction for a guy to get sour grapes when he isn't replied to much... but you can't really blame the women or label them all uncaring and callous bints for that.


PraxxtorCruel said:
Here's one, sent a really long winded message about similar interests we shared and elaborated on them etc. I honestly thought it was one of my best, cracked quite a few jokes in it too. Anyways submitted the message came back the next day to check, no reply. Then I thought why not experiment, so I sent her another message this time saying along the lines 'You sound spoilt and you aren't as amazing as you think' (she had mentioned quite a few times in her profile that she knows or should I say thinks she is the ultimate woman and how she loves boys treating her like a 'princess'). Interesting this time as I got a reply in under 5 minutes, mouthing me off like she had all the time in the world. Infact she sent me a further 3 messages after the first one. Why didn't she spend that time actually trying to have a conversation when people actually put effort into their messages?
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Such a loserish thing to do that it's not even funny, and completely highlights what I wrote above.
 
the easiest way to get girls interested in you online is to get shredded, put up a few tactical shirtless pics (at the beach etc - so you dont come across as a poser), and watch the messages come rolling in. If you are sending out hundreds of messages and barely getting any responses you are simply not pleasing to the eye.

I never send messages, just pick and choose which ones to respond to.
 
MrFeathers said:
the easiest way to get girls interested in you online is to get shredded, put up a few tactical shirtless pics (at the beach etc - so you dont come across as a poser), and watch the messages come rolling in. If you are sending out hundreds of messages and barely getting any responses you are simply not pleasing to the eye.

I never send messages, just pick and choose which ones to respond to.
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But girls with clothes on can do it for me, so why wouldn't vice versa work?
 
Richdog said:
Out of the hundreds of guys who message them, why on Earth would a girl NOT be selective or very selective about who they reply to? Are you under some misguided notion that just because you send a well thought-out, articulated message that a girl is under some obligation to reply, even if she has no interest in you whatsoever? If I was a girl I would be exactly the same, I wouldn't have the time or inclination to reply to every message, only those that took my interest.

It's a common reaction for a guy to get sour grapes when he isn't replied to much... but you can't really blame the women or label them all uncaring and callous bints for that.




Such a loserish thing to do that it's not even funny, and completely highlights what I wrote above.
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Although I can't stand your know it all attitude you are right, especially what you quoted. She quite simply didn't fancy you, move on and be realistic. Why the hell you would talk to anyone you are not attracted to on a dating website baffles me.
 
Richdog said:
Out of the hundreds of guys who message them, why on Earth would a girl NOT be selective or very selective about who they reply to? Are you under some misguided notion that just because you send a well thought-out, articulated message that a girl is under some obligation to reply, even if she has no interest in you whatsoever? If I was a girl I would be exactly the same, I wouldn't have the time or inclination to reply to every message, only those that took my interest.
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That's where we differ then I'm afraid. If the shoe was on the other foot and I was receiving lots of messages I'd reply to them all telling them why I don't want to initiate a conversation/take it any further. I.e - "Sorry, your profile didn't interest me" or "Sorry I don't find you attractive" or "Sorry, we don't seem to have any common interests" etc it takes all of 30 seconds and they know exactly where they stand and what exactly I didn't like about them.

But anyway it's a moot point for me, as I'm no longer on a dating site. I simply can't be arsed with putting in the effort, as I've said before I'm quite happy being single and staying single.
 
ljt said:
That's where we differ then I'm afraid. If the shoe was on the other foot and I was receiving lots of messages I'd reply to them all telling them why I don't want to initiate a conversation/take it any further. I.e - "Sorry, your profile didn't interest me" or "Sorry I don't find you attractive" or "Sorry, we don't seem to have any common interests" etc it takes all of 30 seconds and they know exactly where they stand and what exactly I didn't like about them.

But anyway it's a moot point for me, as I'm no longer on a dating site. I simply can't be arsed with putting in the effort, as I've said before I'm quite happy being single and staying single.
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people only reply to messages from people that might interest them. yeh a select few will be like you and send out no matter what, but only a very small percentage. if no reply in a few days, then they weren't interested for whatever reason.



on the plus side. I have a date this week :)
 
ljt said:
That's where we differ then I'm afraid. If the shoe was on the other foot and I was receiving lots of messages I'd reply to them all telling them why I don't want to initiate a conversation/take it any further. I.e - "Sorry, your profile didn't interest me" or "Sorry I don't find you attractive" or "Sorry, we don't seem to have any common interests" etc it takes all of 30 seconds and they know exactly where they stand and what exactly I didn't like about them.
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Yes, but only because at no point have you ever been in the position to recieve and answer hundreds of messages over an extended period of time, so your well-intentioned but misplaced principled idealism still burns bright. :p
 
ljt said:
That's where we differ then I'm afraid. If the shoe was on the other foot and I was receiving lots of messages I'd reply to them all telling them why I don't want to initiate a conversation/take it any further. I.e - "Sorry, your profile didn't interest me" or "Sorry I don't find you attractive" or "Sorry, we don't seem to have any common interests" etc it takes all of 30 seconds and they know exactly where they stand and what exactly I didn't like about them.

But anyway it's a moot point for me, as I'm no longer on a dating site. I simply can't be arsed with putting in the effort, as I've said before I'm quite happy being single and staying single.
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I remember having this discussion in this thread a few months ago about replying to say you're not interested etc. What is the point?

If it was me, I'd rather be ignored than for someone to reply and tell me they're not interested. It's like them saying "I'm too good for you. Move along now"

I've replied in the past to say I'm not interested or not my type, but I've had people replying back to ask why etc and trying to make conversation. Wasting my time even more?

How many messages did you receive a day? Perhaps if you received 15+ messages a day then you wouldn't be thinking the same? Even if it's just copying and pasting "sorry, not interested." it will still annoy the hell out of me having to repeat it so many times in a day.
 
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