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Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

Discussion in 'GD Archive' started by jrodga2k5, May 19, 2008.

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  1. Bes

    Soldato

    Joined: Oct 18, 2002

    Posts: 7,232

    Location: The Ghetto: AKA Brixton

    Internet dating is something that takes time and persistence to get right. I am finally enjoying some decent success with a few hotties at the moment....

    My advice is that the best darned photo you can take of yourself gets you about 60% of the way there.... The next 30% is your profile and (sorry to pick on Maj here) a profile like Maj's above (in my opinion) just screams 'generic' and I think it's vital to differentiate yourself more (Everyone has something interesting they can say?!). Of course, no offence intended, and if it is working for you, I am glad to hear it, but I found it took a few rewrites/ trial-and-error to get mine working to any decent degree.

    The final 10% is the message, but I find if you get the first 2 right, the first message matters a whole lot less.
     
  2. maj

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Jul 19, 2010

    Posts: 2,368

    Location: Newcastle

    Thanks for the feedback, appreciate it.

    The two people one is my most recent one that's all. I very rarely get one taken when I'm on my own. The one where I'm alone on Penny Lane is actually two year old but I've changed my main pic to that for now till I can get a new one taken.

    Well I was a bit vague on purpose as I wanted to get questioned on it (basically I'm a big fan of rollercoasters and want to skydive and bungee jump one day).
     
  3. maj

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Jul 19, 2010

    Posts: 2,368

    Location: Newcastle

    No offence taken:) I just don't know how to describe myself any better as I don't want to lie and want to come across as myself. I don't have any particular exciting or interesting hobbies. I work during the week, then on a weekend either socialise with friends, watch football, chill in the house, or work on the car. Not very exciting I'm sure you'll all agree:(
     
  4. Bes

    Soldato

    Joined: Oct 18, 2002

    Posts: 7,232

    Location: The Ghetto: AKA Brixton

    That's fine, but my advice would be think about the way that you write it. I basically have two things in my profile that differentiate mine from yours (as in hard facts), one related to international travel, and the other related to the fact I used to own a business and want to again (Neither get asked about much by the way) but other than that, I don't have/ do anything radically different. It's all in the way you dress yourself up. For instance, I talk about what I am like, what I believe in (e.g. ambition, creativity, trying anything once), rather than what I do, as everyone does the same boring stuff, but put some creativity into it.

    I'm afraid I am not going to post my profile text, as I've seen some sad individuals in this thread start using it to bait/ provoke people. Anyway, in my experience, it's the above kind of thing that gets women interested. YMMV.
     
  5. maj

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Jul 19, 2010

    Posts: 2,368

    Location: Newcastle

    Thanks for the advice. Appreciated:) I'll have another go at re-writing my profile and see if I can 'sell' myself better.
     
  6. maj

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Jul 19, 2010

    Posts: 2,368

    Location: Newcastle

  7. Buffman

    Sgarrista

    Joined: May 4, 2007

    Posts: 7,608

    Location: Warwickshire

    She wants to bang, and thinks you're a stage 5 clinger.

    Tone it down then stand and bang
     
  8. grudas

    Capodecina

    Joined: Mar 12, 2008

    Posts: 20,587

    Location: West sussex

    Any one noticed how probably 70% of the girls want a guy to make them laugh?? Like that's their "ideal" thing? Some go as far as "that's all you need" which isn't true obviously but personally a sense of humour is something I'd expect from a person no matter what so why type it up in the "perfect match"

    Lately I've been having fun just reading these descriptions of what girls want from their perfect match..
     
  9. Burnsy2023

    Man of Honour

    Joined: Nov 17, 2003

    Posts: 36,437

    Location: Southampton, UK

    That all dpends on having the same sense of humour which is very difficult to describe anyway. You just have to see whether it works or not.

    Anyway, I updated my profile, waiting for the harsh feedback: http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=59371542
     
  10. MisChief

    Sgarrista

    Joined: Mar 8, 2005

    Posts: 9,173

    Profile looks good to me, but close them legs ;) I mean... That bracket in the 2nd paragraph about Indian food :p

    Not too sure about that sticking tongue out pic though.
     
  11. Burnsy2023

    Man of Honour

    Joined: Nov 17, 2003

    Posts: 36,437

    Location: Southampton, UK

    Yeah, I'm undecided about it too tbh.

    My legs will stay open and proud though. It's a habit after being on a Police cordon for 6 hours straights.
     
  12. Tefal

    Capo Crimine

    Joined: Jun 30, 2007

    Posts: 66,531

    Location: Wales

    NSA is awesome :p


    just gotta approach it in the right way, either they're an FB you don't talk much but when you're both horny or nearby if it's a distance thing, shag like bunnies have a giggle then say good bye, there's a Greek girl in Manchester i do this with, if i'm out shopping or night out an she's home from work message each other, pop in to her flat hump have a cup of tea an a bit of a natter and be gone.

    or your FWB you hang out you be friends you screw when you like, if they meet someone or you meet someone that part ends, and you be happy for them just as you would when anyone of your friends meets someone new.


    you just need to know if you're able to separate sex and love, if you can't don't do it you'll just **** both of you over.
     
  13. holymonk

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Oct 12, 2011

    Posts: 1,490

    Well you know its going wrong when after the 4th occasion lying in bed its "what are we?"
     
  14. FatFishMonster

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Mar 23, 2011

    Posts: 1,663

    Location: Devon

    Just taken a bit a of "shotgun" tactic to my messages.
    stopped using online dating for a while, now re-ventured out into the sea with my bobber....

    Sent out 13 messages, good grammar, just your standard:
    "Hello
    *QUESTION*
    *REMARK ABOUT SOMETHING ON THEIR PROFILE OR PHOTO'S*
    *ANOTHER QUESTION*

    be interesting to see if i get any replies at all...
     
  15. Stolly

    Mobster

    Joined: Mar 11, 2004

    Posts: 4,965

    1st date with a lady off POF tonight...we connected over fitness, we have run a lot of the same races etc.

    Turns out she's done this half iron man two years in a row...I asked how she got on "oh I've won it two years in a row and set a new course record".....okaaaay....that's pretty hardcore then !
     
  16. PrOdiGy1

    Hitman

    Joined: Oct 20, 2005

    Posts: 614

    Location: Manchester

    Genuinely wish you the best of luck! A lot of this game is about timing IMO.......
     
  17. FatFishMonster

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Mar 23, 2011

    Posts: 1,663

    Location: Devon

    13 messages sent out.
    8 profile views
    0 messages..

    starting to remember why i stopped using it!
    there must be something inherently wrong with me or my profile!
     
  18. PrOdiGy1

    Hitman

    Joined: Oct 20, 2005

    Posts: 614

    Location: Manchester

    Unhealthy to think that way! There's nothing "wrong" with you, but there might be stuff you can do to improve your chances of a reply. Online is a bit of a meat market so shouldn't be the be all and end all of your "search". IMO it should be used as a tool to accompany it.

    Personally I found it didn't work for me so I'm trying alternatives rather than wasting any more time on it.
     
  19. FatFishMonster

    Wise Guy

    Joined: Mar 23, 2011

    Posts: 1,663

    Location: Devon

    yeah, ive only ever used online dating as an extension of my social life, another bobber in the water, i don't put too much faith into it, but still, after using POF for about 8 months ive only ever had 3 dates (2 with the same girl).

    it can be very disheartening. i must be doing something wrong!
     
  20. PrOdiGy1

    Hitman

    Joined: Oct 20, 2005

    Posts: 614

    Location: Manchester

    "I'm doing something wrong" I think is only one of the conclusions one could draw from it all. There's plenty of others if you think about it. Some examples:

    1. You are competing against hundred of other guys. If you don't stand out in some way (be that looks or in the message) you are probably not going to get very far. There is nothing wrong with not being a superstud with a million zany interests, it's just the nature of being a guy in the online dating world. It's very superficial to begin with.....
    2. Someone may want to spend time writing a proper reply so have not done so yet
    3. Somebody has started seeing someone more seriously and doesn't feel comfortable replying to people online
    4. What some people post on their profiles is actually not what they are like at all as a person. So even though you might think you are a good match based on reading theirs, they might not agree.
    5. etc etc


    Really it depends what you are after and what your expectations are I guess. For me I know I'm up against it for various reasons so it doesn't really surprise me that I've had bugger all success online.
     
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