Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

Neil79 · 27 Sep 2012 at 23:22

Am i the only one who gets " xxxx is interested in you " on pof only to find out it's a rather fat woman?, that's all i seem to get is fat women. Am i destined to be chased by fat women who's always seen the front of a burger bar?

I'm not talking about just slightly over weight but fat ugly ones

Gzero · 28 Sep 2012 at 00:31

Neil79 said:
Am i the only one who gets " xxxx is interested in you " on pof only to find out it's a rather fat woman?, that's all i seem to get is fat women. Am i destined to be chased by fat women who's always seen the front of a burger bar?

I'm not talking about just slightly over weight but fat ugly ones

The ones that attract attention (that you may be interested in) don't use the meet me section, probably haven't even noticed it / figured out how it works as they get bombarded from day one.

unwashed potato! · 28 Sep 2012 at 00:31

i have the same problem. i've emailed literally every girl i like in the near enough area that i'm now going further and further but in reality i'd never go meet up with the people that far, even if it did work for gavin and stacey.

i've signed up to okcupid and seen the same bloody girls, though a few different ones. i may try a paid for one just to see if the issue is simply the amount of messages girls get that's meaning they don't see yours/bother to proplerly check you out.

also on okcupid there is a girl that really seems to like my first few messages, from her replies i felt she was keen and genuine, even if her replies were a tad short. usually takes her a day to reply, so i send like now, she'll reply tomo evening. last week i a message wednesday night which i've heard nothing back from. i know i shouldn't send another but i feel atm it's a lost cause now if she's not going to reply any way. she's been online reguariliy enough as it says on the site last activity.

would people send another message and if so how long would you wait? what would you send? it's silly as i'd not normally look into things much, but online dating is an odd one. surely she's there to meet someone, she is messaging and guy she seems to liek and then bam out of the blue stops. ???

Gzero · 28 Sep 2012 at 00:36

shifty_uk said:
Actually hating this internet dating stuff now. Messaging girls you like to get no reply really does things to your confidence, despite the fact the very same girl would be totally into you on a night out!

I even had a girl say recently ''sorry I never messaged back, I just think you're outta my league'' - What the on earth does that mean? Best excuse I've heard for not being interested!

I had a quiet one last weekend and had a date the weekend before so I've not had a chance to get out and about, new numbers etc! It's really depressing me, nothing/no one to take my mind away from the ex-GF!

/Violin

It just means that your first date* didn't go very well, that's all. I'm working on a theory that some people are just not suited for online dating sites, and need their friends to push them to do anything at all never mind send a message to a stranger.

*The date took place in her head, you were amazing/mysterious/intellectual/witty/courteous that she couldn't keep up, and for that reason...

Hitman_Leon · 28 Sep 2012 at 00:40

I was useless at pof or pof was useless for me recently left after meeting my new lady, was a shaky complicated start due to her knowing my ex but now its going swimmingly and ive left the pof pond behind.

Gzero · 28 Sep 2012 at 00:40

Mammalian said:
i have the same problem. i've emailed literally every girl i like in the near enough area that i'm now going further and further but in reality i'd never go meet up with the people that far, even if it did work for gavin and stacey.

i've signed up to okcupid and seen the same bloody girls, though a few different ones. i may try a paid for one just to see if the issue is simply the amount of messages girls get that's meaning they don't see yours/bother to proplerly check you out.

also on okcupid there is a girl that really seems to like my first few messages, from her replies i felt she was keen and genuine, even if her replies were a tad short. usually takes her a day to reply, so i send like now, she'll reply tomo evening. last week i a message wednesday night which i've heard nothing back from. i know i shouldn't send another but i feel atm it's a lost cause now if she's not going to reply any way. she's been online reguariliy enough as it says on the site last activity.

would people send another message and if so how long would you wait? what would you send? it's silly as i'd not normally look into things much, but online dating is an odd one. surely she's there to meet someone, she is messaging and guy she seems to liek and then bam out of the blue stops. ???

It's pointless to try second guessing what is happening, you just have assume that nothing is set in stone until you are actually seeing each other. Fickle creatures and all that,

. Someone (seemingly more) better may have come along in real life or online and sweeped her off her feet etc.

Richdog · 28 Sep 2012 at 08:15

Narj said:
Jealous tbh.

Smash fresh pasty while you can get away with it. I know I would if I was in his position.

Amazing how all the "smash the pasty" comments seem to be made by certain types. If you think a 16 or 17 year old kid compares to a 20+ year old in the sack, then you have a hell of a lot to learn about sex. Yes, they are legal, but if as a man you are aged 21+ and you need to be going to 16 and 17 year old kids to get your fix, then you are one pretty sad and slightly desperate person. IMO, of course.

Narj · 28 Sep 2012 at 08:40

Richdog said:
Amazing how all the "smash the pasty" comments seem to be made by certain types. If you think a 16 or 17 year old kid compares to a 20+ year old in the sack, then you have a hell of a lot to learn about sex. Yes, they are legal, but if as a man you are aged 21+ and you need to be going to 16 and 17 year old kids to get your fix, then you are one pretty sad and slightly desperate person. IMO, of course.

I'm not 21 so wouldn't entertain the thought. However, it's not as if every 20 plus person is amazing in the sack. Anyone of any age can turn out to be a sack of spuds. Generally age has little to do with it... how frigging mental they are is a good guide. :-)

Richdog · 28 Sep 2012 at 09:01

Narj said:
I'm not 21 so wouldn't entertain the thought. However, it's not as if every 20 plus person is amazing in the sack. Anyone of any age can turn out to be a sack of spuds. Generally age has little to do with it... how frigging mental they are is a good guide.

Of course age has something to do with it... as it generally ties in with experience. The older a girl is and the more people she has slept with, the more comfortable she will generally be with her body and her sexuality, that's just common sense. Give me a 21 year old woman with a fully developed figure over a 17 year old kid with traces of puppy fat any day of the week.

MoNkeE · 28 Sep 2012 at 09:44

This man speaks the truth. Yes it's not always a given - I've had younger girls with less partners that were better than older ones with more; but sometimes you just can't teach sexy

cHk4 · 28 Sep 2012 at 10:24

Well I'm back on the old bandwagon so to speak. Tattoos are attracting a lot of interest but mostly from skanks -.-

grudas · 28 Sep 2012 at 13:38

Richdog said:
Amazing how all the "smash the pasty" comments seem to be made by certain types. If you think a 16 or 17 year old kid compares to a 20+ year old in the sack, then you have a hell of a lot to learn about sex. Yes, they are legal, but if as a man you are aged 21+ and you need to be going to 16 and 17 year old kids to get your fix, then you are one pretty sad and slightly desperate person. IMO, of course.

tbh it depends on the girl, no way would i be her "first" as girls do get hurt for some reason and i really don't think i would even bother talking about "that" until she's 18 or over

some of the 17 year olds really look like kids, others you would think are over 20! its all in the person i guess.

vincent1989 · 30 Sep 2012 at 00:42

Ta mischief and richdog. Advice followed, date number two all lined up. Succesful day was had

.

Richdog · 30 Sep 2012 at 09:17

Had a pretty unsuccessful sate yesterday.a French blonde doctor came to visit me from 3 hours away but to be honest she was a little too chunky in the leg and bum and leg area for me and her Facebook photos had hidden it well. Lovely girl but zero chemistry from my side and I ended up having to fend her off and bundle her on a train as she didn't quite pick up only less than enthusiastic signals and wanted to stay the night. Ahh well, from now confirmed slim body photos only!

vincent1989 said:
Ta mischief and richdog. Advice followed, date number two all lined up. Succesful day was had .

Good man!

regulus · 30 Sep 2012 at 20:59

So after a well deserved break from the holders of the XX chromosome, I'm back on the saddle. Lined up a date with a Yank tomorrow night. She's Republican. She mentioned it twice in our earlier phone conversation.

I'm expecting trouble since my social tendencies are slightly left leaning

I can't wait.

grudas · 30 Sep 2012 at 21:02

regulus said:
So after a well deserved break from the holders of the XX chromosome, I'm back on the saddle. Lined up a date with a Yank tomorrow night. She's Republican. She mentioned it twice in our earlier phone conversation.

I'm expecting trouble since my social tendencies are slightly left leaning

I can't wait.

expecting trouble - can't wait

Richdog · 30 Sep 2012 at 21:29

regulus said:
So after a well deserved break from the holders of the XX chromosome, I'm back on the saddle. Lined up a date with a Yank tomorrow night. She's Republican. She mentioned it twice in our earlier phone conversation.

I'm expecting trouble since my social tendencies are slightly left leaning

I can't wait.

Ack, Americans talking about politics... think that'd be one of the biggest turn-off's I can thnk of. *shudders*

unwashed potato! · 2 Oct 2012 at 22:38

i'm a litle lost with this and would like thoughts and suggestions on what others do.

so while ago i get a reply from a girl, seems great, attrative, her replies seem genuine and interesting. after a few she just stops replying even though she's online enough. fair enough maybe she's found someone else.

another girl gives a few good replies, all she seems interesting and then now she's stopped replying. perhaps it's early days as it's only been the second evening today, however she been online updating her profile, and before she's a fairly quick replier.

perhaps it's just coincidence but it always seems to be around the 3/4 message that it goes dead. i'm wondering if just simply people get bored of small talk messaging and want something more after the second. from the impressoin i've had this isn't the case but i'd like to know how peopel go about messaging after the first 1/2 replies.

how soon would people suggest meeting up, or perhaps talk about it? tbh after the few couple and if they have a decent profile i'd like to meet up, jhust because it's much easier and quicker to get to know someone, people get drunk exchange a few words and then go on a date from that so it's not unheard of, but for online dating is it different.

i've heard people on here say got a couple more dates lined up etc so i can't understand what's up. why do they go dead after a few. why are most not even replying. why when you do get a reply it's rubbish.

i tinhk i'm looking into this too much but it's just annoying when you think great, good looking girl seems interesting going well you start thinking might finally get a date and then it just goes dead leaving you wondering what is wrong with you.

ljt · 3 Oct 2012 at 13:54

Mammalian said:
why do they go dead after a few. why are most not even replying. why when you do get a reply it's rubbish.

These are the questions that I asked and many asked before, and blokes will ask again and again. It's simply because you are one of a hundred blokes messaging her, so she uses the first few messages to whittle people down. They use short answers to keep you hanging on so you won't move on to someone else yourself, and just incase the other people they are talking to who are more interesting/better than you at the moment, start blanking her, she can then come back to you as a second best as she technically never stopped talking to you.
Welcome to online dating

elmarko · 3 Oct 2012 at 14:52

regulus said:
So after a well deserved break from the holders of the XX chromosome, I'm back on the saddle. Lined up a date with a Yank tomorrow night. She's Republican. She mentioned it twice in our earlier phone conversation.

I'm expecting trouble since my social tendencies are slightly left leaning

I can't wait.

Just don't mention politics, ethics, human rights, equality, religion, race or economics & you will be fine

.

I think you should go with a copy of the Grundrisse & start talking about Marxism.