So every year Valencia and it's surrounding districts hold a festival called Falles. This basically consists of a week long celebration of noise, fireworks, partying and setting things on fire! It's up there with La Tomatina and The Running of the Bulls as far as Spanish festivities go but it's one other Europeans don't seem to know about.
It is absolutely BONKERS. I've never experienced something so busy. 2 MILLION extra people come to Valencia for this, and Europe knows how to party there is literally no down-time. The streets are rammed 24/7 - the closest approximation I can make is how busy the vicinity around stadiums is immediately following a game. Imagine that, everywhere, 24 hours a day for a week. Bars & Clubs don't close until 6/7am and the first parade is every day at 8am.
Yeah there are parades of marching bands and guys in fancy clothes pretty much all day aswell, you absolutely 100% require earplugs if you want to sleep. I took some but still only managed 3/4 hours a night. It's like a warzone, there are kids with LOUD firecrackers everywhere throwing them at tourists then laughing when they jump out of their skin. Fortunately you become completely desensitised after a day or so, you could throw a grenade at me and I wouldn't flinch now!
So during the year leading up to Falles, each district builds one or several 'Fallas'. These are basically elaborate, mostly satirical or child friendly statue type things.
Most of them this year were understandably poking fun at the EU economy, lots of caricatures of Angela Merkel and the like. Who knew the Spanish could be self-deprecating like us Brits?
I was expecting some Blue Peter paper mache type constructions, but hell no these things are HUGE and intricate.
There are loads of these dotted around the city, some only 12-15ft in size and others 5 story's ish.
The next important component of Falles is a daily ceremony called La Mascletà. This is held at 1400 everyday and is an ever enlarging barrage of bonkers fireworks and firecrackers but the emphasis is on
noise, not lightshows.
We did manage to drag or sorry selves out on the last day of Falles to see this (thus the loudest
). Well actually we just didn't go to bed and stood in the square like zombies for 3 hours waiting for it to start. You have to get there early you can see above how heaving it is.
So it begins and I've never experienced anything like this! Even with the huge buffer of people between me and the explosions my whole body is moving with each blow, you can feel it in the floor and the buildings it feels like an earthquake for 20 minutes. I had watched this before on YouTube and didn't get it at all, you HAVE to be there to understand the event. Incredible. It peaks at around 130db, and you can stand barely 20m away.
Aswell as the daytime fireworks of Mescleta everynight at 0100 there's a fireworks display. Of course this gets bigger and bigger everynight aswell! I've seen some incredible fireworks displays in my time (Epcot Millennium Celebration, sweet jesus) and these were definitely worthy. The final night was a good 20-25 minutes and had some fancy stuff I'd never seen before. Smiley face fireworks, some which went up, down then back up again and some weird ones that would launch then float through the sky like lanterns.
I tried to take a 360 panorama of the fireworks bridge, didn't come out great but here it is anyway.
http://i.imgur.com/yOIOuMH.jpg
Oh yeah did I mention that through the heart of the city there's a massive repurposed riverbed!? The whole place is beautifully landscaped & dotted with outside GYMS for bodyweight & crossfit faggots
.
Then at the end, before the F1 track sits a load of incredible museums. These buildings blow my mind every time I see them.
Biuriful.
Ok this waffling on now! Enough culture will do Lad Cliffs.
Sloots: Everywhere, absolutely everywhere. No fatties over there, just loads of petite brunettes wearing leggings. It's absolute torture when they don't speak English and you just stare at them half chub. By the end of the week I think had test levels on par with UE.
When you can find sloots that speak English, they're very friendly and actually interesting. Met a stunning Swedish lass the first night (who I later found out was 20, score), a girl from Boston (who really loved my Matt Damon impression I'm sure) and eventually a Spaniard on the last night.
Partying: Bars & Clubs err'where. Open typically 1000 until 0600/0700. They will be heaving and partying that late aswell. Fantastic atmosphere regardless, very different to the UK. Everyone's there just to have a laugh and socialise, there's no lads trying to look hard nor women vying for attention. Brilliant.
Beers: 1EUR get's you big 1litre bottles of lager. Spirit measures are lol over there, about 5-7EUR for a spirit mixer in a bar but they just pour until you say stop! Probably the equivalent of 4/5 shots each time. And nice branded spirits aswell.
Accomodation: Went with 7 other guys and shared a pretty nice apartment bang in the middle of the lols.
Sweet living room
Our Ludus outside for gladatorial training
Can't remember exactly but I think it worked out about £28pppn, well worth it over a hostel.
DYEL: I stood out like a sore thumb there lol. It's quite refreshing to not be the shortest guy everywhere I go, most people there are my height or shorter skinny dark haired etc. I'm a stocky, pasty brit with a bright ginger beard lol. People are generally a lot more in shape than here though, perhaps the nice weather and perfect setup of the riverbed contribute to that. During siesta the riverbed is full of joggers, cyclists, yoga classes, people on the outdoor gyms etc. It's pretty awesome.
. No change in diet at all just a change in routine has reignited my loins 
. Looking forward to undoing all this when at a house party on Saturday night, so far rocking a 3:1 girl/guy ratio on facebook. Yes.
.
. I do remember managing 3x8 35kg DB Bench though which I was happy with, biggest DBs at my gym.
