Natural/in built motivation?

[radderfire]

The trick with motivation is making a start on something. Make starting easy. I find it helps using timers (get a watch with a stopwatch). So, set easy time goal for something you need to do:

10 mins working

then

3 mins break (e.g. watching YouTube video, don't let this overrun)

Repeat.

For the 10 mins "work", this is just something you need to do, targeted towards a goal. E.g. a chore around the house. Just remember, you only ever need to do 10 mins, then you can 3 min break. It works.

As for inspiration about hobbies etc, I advise making a list, so whenever inspiration strikes, write it down. In general it's good also to have notebooks around to write notes when ideas pop into your head, e.g. inspiration, goals etc. Then prioritise the list so you know what you want to do first. Then set small goals and put them into your 10 min / 3 min routine. The trick with motivation is setting very small targets just to get you started, then once you have started, you keep going.

Hope this helps.

 

[Telecaster]

I will. I've been with my wife and 2 children to see Frozen at the Drury Lane theatre today.

What have you been up to today?

Nothing, obviously, if you'd read anything I'd posted.

Do you know what you enjoy doing? Have you ever thought about that?

Not much, I enjoy pottering and using my time as I see fit, having a job and lack of finances kind of kyboshes that.

 

[potatolord]

Not much, I enjoy pottering and using my time as I see fit, having a job and lack of finances kind of kyboshes that.

Do you enjoy going to new places? Meeting new people? Learning new skills? Physical activity?

If you don't know what you want, you'll struggle to find it.

 

[!bluetonic!]

Nothing, obviously, if you'd read anything I'd posted

I had read your posts. I was a little miffed by your low IQ comment, hence my question which included some gloating. I've gone back to thinking we wouldn't be friends.

What would it take for you to do something / anything? What is physically or mentally stopping you from making a difference in your life tomorrow.

1. Take your neighbour's dog for a walk
2. Volunteer
3. Talk to a stranger
4. Bake a cake and share it amongst your neighbours
5. Learn a magic trick for You Tube and impress a family member with it
6. Write a plan of the things you want to achieve in life and post it here

 

[Telecaster]

Do you enjoy going to new places? Meeting new people? Learning new skills? Physical activity?

If you don't know what you want, you'll struggle to find it.

None of those appeal, but I feel like I should do some of them anyway just to avoid becoming a social leper.

People I can take or leave, I don't have a passport but have seen a lot of the UK. I have been trying for the past 6 months or so to think of a physical activity I can get into, as I mentioned above it would have to be a sport or something with a purpose, just going to a gym for tedious exercise has zero appeal.

 

[Telecaster]

I had read your posts. I was a little miffed by your low IQ comment, hence my question which included some gloating. I've gone back to thinking we wouldn't be friends.

What would it take for you to do something / anything? What is physically or mentally stopping you from making a difference in your life tomorrow.

1. Take your neighbour's dog for a walk
2. Volunteer
3. Talk to a stranger
4. Bake a cake and share it amongst your neighbours
5. Learn a magic trick for You Tube and impress a family member with it
6. Write a plan of the things you want to achieve in life and post it here

Aside from volunteering, none of those things are anything I would do, sorry. They're all a bit sappy and simple minded.

 

[Telecaster]

I don't know at what point my brain went down this path, I just know that since puberty life has been pretty grim, mentally speaking. All the things regular folk take for granted or that comes naturally like socialising and having fun, travelling, relationships, friends etc. just doesn't carry any meaning with me.

 

[Lokai]

None of those appeal, but I feel like I should do some of them anyway just to avoid becoming a social leper.

People I can take or leave, I don't have a passport but have seen a lot of the UK. I have been trying for the past 6 months or so to think of a physical activity I can get into, as I mentioned above it would have to be a sport or something with a purpose, just going to a gym for tedious exercise has zero appeal.

Take up a martial art. Fitness, learn a skill, progression, meet people. Lots of positives.

 

[!bluetonic!]

Aside from volunteering, none of those things are anything I would do, sorry. They're all a bit sappy and simple minded.

Therein lies your problem.

You think you're too good or of a higher mind for any of this. You must feel so entitled to a better life but unwilling to put any effort in. What the heck do you expect in life. You reap what you sow and you're sowing nothing.

You sound depressed. Please reach out to your GP next week or phone the Samaritans tonight for some sound advice regarding your mental health. Please keep us posted. When the bullet points above don't sound sappy, you'll know you've reached the upward path.

 

[radderfire]

What hobbies have you had any interest in in the past?

 

[radderfire]

I don't know at what point my brain went down this path, I just know that since puberty life has been pretty grim, mentally speaking. All the things regular folk take for granted or that comes naturally like socialising and having fun, travelling, relationships, friends etc. just doesn't carry any meaning with me.

Don't compare yourself to other people, and don't worry about other people, just work out what works for you and what helps you. Don't be hard on yourself, be nice to yourself. Don't spend any time at all dwelling on negative things, just look for the next constructive thing you can do. Really, be nice to yourself.

 

[NotAGolf]

None of those appeal, but I feel like I should do some of them anyway just to avoid becoming a social leper.

People I can take or leave, I don't have a passport but have seen a lot of the UK. I have been trying for the past 6 months or so to think of a physical activity I can get into, as I mentioned above it would have to be a sport or something with a purpose, just going to a gym for tedious exercise has zero appeal.

Running or cycling? Piece of cake to do. Can do it by yourself or join a club. Most clubs have people of all abilities. You could sign up for a 5k run or a short sportive ride toward the end of the year to give you something to aim for.

Do you live near water? If so, what about kayaking or paddleboarding? Bit of more of a solo activity, but it will get you you out of the house, it's quite easy, and will give you a different view from the norm.

I echo comments about volunteering somewhere. Like some have said, even if you don't enjoy it, you'd be helping others which should make you feel better. Could do something like litter picking if you don't want to deal with people.

I think the most important thing is getting out of the house. A bit of fresh air and a view of something other than from your bed and sofa would make a nice change.

What do you do for a job? You've mentioned you've had a few. Are they all in the same sector?

 

[Efour]

Get into deadpan comedy you'd be good at that too.
Do you watch TV or anything? No favourite shows?
Do you talk a lot online like here, I haven't looked.
I'd recommend happy pills but I personally don't believe in them, maybe a professional can help you properly?

 

[The_Arbiter]

What hobbies have you had any interest in in the past?

I wonder that too. Your post about not comparing oneself to others is something the western world really needs to adhere to i feel.

Sport appears to be the only thing OP has not disregarded as option. Sport can be as easy or hard as you like, it can be as solo (to an extent at least) or with as many people as you want too. One poster mentioned bikes being an easy one, just cruising some cross country for fun/fresh air/escape, or something more trick orientated which nobody has ever reached peak performance or ever will is the opposite end and incredibly hard. I imagine just smashing a ball against the wall (squash) could be alright with some music you like blasting away as well as something simple and relaxing.

The post about evening classes learning music is a nice idea that i never thought of, something i might take up at some point. I've thought about learning an instrument, but doing it in a group would be cool.

 

[Semple]

@Telecaster I take your point.

Okay. Imagine being a Jew in Nazi Germany. Imagine everything you owned taken from you.
Imagine living in an infested hell hole of a concentration camp, never knowing what day would be your last.

Now please moan about your own life.

I'm a do-er because I have freedom to choose my life and don't want to waste much of it.

I look at history to realise how easy I have life.

Just wtf is this.

 

[drakulton]

Life is like Dale's supermarket sweep. Rush round and fill your trolley with material stuff and experiences...... or don't.

Then at the end, the trolley slips from your fingers.

 

[CapitalOne]

I don't know at what point my brain went down this path, I just know that since puberty life has been pretty grim, mentally speaking. All the things regular folk take for granted or that comes naturally like socialising and having fun, travelling, relationships, friends etc. just doesn't carry any meaning with me.

Go get a flight to Mumbai. Get off plane. Breathe in heat. Walk outside. Think “wtf”. Come back to mud island and think “the world is bigger than I thought”. Or volunteer.

 

[Telecaster]

What do you do for a job? You've mentioned you've had a few. Are they all in the same sector?

Not all the same sectors no, currently I am a mobile service engineer.

Do you watch TV or anything? No favourite shows?
Do you talk a lot online like here, I haven't looked.
I'd recommend happy pills but I personally don't believe in them, maybe a professional can help you properly?

No not watched Tv for what must be 20 years or more, no interest in that. Certainly don't want to go down the route of meds. I am a member of various forums but I don't post a massive amount, I mostly just read.

I have seriously considered removing myself entirely from the internet, but I find it a great source of information and always something to read that I think I would find it quite a challenge.

 

[Trusty]

An odd post, but I'm sat here on yet another weekend of doing nothing and couldn't think of anywhere else to ask.

I've always wanted to do things, get more from life but I can never manage to do anything about it, I was wondering where/how/what people got this magic motivation from to get out there and do things? Does it just come naturally or do people really have to try hard or convince themselves to do stuff?

I have no life outside of going to work and never have- I never plan anything or have any goals etc. the easiest way I can think to explain it is that I want things to change but it seems I don't want it enough to actually do anything about it. My life is literally taken one day at a time, I wake up every morning knowing the only thing I will do that day is go to work and eat, weekends are worse because I don't have the work thing (most weekends at least) so I just sit around twiddling my thumbs. I also can't seem to find any enjoyment in things, I will start doing something or trying a new hobby and just give up after 10 minutes out of boredom.

Today there are things I need to do around the flat, some small DIY jobs to do, clothes to wash, tidying up to do but I just can't bring myself to do it. I haven't even got any food in the fridge so I'm sat here hungry because I can't be bothered to go out.

The older I am getting it is getting worse which is worrying me a little, I've tried all the usual "advice" for this sort of stuff but it just boils down to actually wanting to do it- like quitting smoking or something, you can try all the tricks in the book but unless you really really want to quit then it isn't going to happen.

Sorry for waffling, I needed an outlet.

https://twitter.com/x/status/1489968127588851724

 

[bainbridge]

I think that you haven't gotten to know yourself. Do you push your feelings down? If you do this long enough, you don't know why you feel the way that you feel.

Are you lonely? Some people are fine living a solitary life, but there's a huge difference between being alone and lonely. You might be lonely and not even realise.

Sounds like you have a lot to unpack and examine. Do yourself a favour and get to know yourself. Identify the good bits that you want to hold onto, and capitalise on, and the not so good bits, the bits that you want to learn not to react to, and eventually change.

Get some help, you won't regret it!