Like what is actually going on, iv been patient been waiting since position 800+.
Join the club?
Try reading the thread a few pages back and it will become obvious. Or just read some tech news and find out about the chip shortages.
Also check Gibbo's thread on delivery updates here:
https://www.overclockers.co.uk/forums/posts/34627839
Have Asus just stopped making cards or something
No
it's been weeks since I moved up the queue other than what has obviously been from cancellation (like 2 or 3 at a time)
Yes, thats quite normal in this situation.
is there an alternative card 3080 or 3090 that I can be offered that has better stock supplies?
No, unless you are very lucky and Gibbo decides that the card slightly better than yours has an empty queue and out of the goodness of his heart starts supplying the next level down with what comes in.
I'm currently waiting in position 198 or something on a 3080 ROG Strix OC but this is getting silly do I have any other options to get one at all from you guys?
Not really, see above, or spend an hour or so reading through this thread.
The only other option you have is to cancel and get your money back, which you have had the option to do since shortly after the orders were placed and everyone realised that Nvidia wasn't going to be able to keep up with supply.
There is some info on how to do that here:
https://www.overclockers.co.uk/cpu-gpu-pre-order-update
Sorry if I'm sounding short but I just need a vent iv been waiting since September (I think? It's been soo long )
Again, I commiserate with your situation, but like thousands of others here and in in queues at other companies, we are all in the same boat/club/whatever.