Phrases you can't stand...

Man of Honour
Joined
14 Apr 2017
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3,511
Location
London
So now I'm imagining a 3000 mile taxi ride on the meter. Might be a little pricey :)

After that thought popped into my head, I had to take a closer look at it with standard London taxi fare tariffs. There's a variety of charges for up to 6 miles, but for a 3000 mile journey that won't have much effect on the price. So...a 3000 mile taxi ride on the meter at standard London rates would cost a bit over £11,000. But that's assuming the cabbie does you the favour of turning the meter off whenever you stop.

Turn the meter off whenever you stop! Oh you are a card, and no mistake!
There’s more chance of Diane Abbott winning a Nobel Prize in Economic Sciences.
I can only speak for myself, but when I was piloting my black money box around London I wouldn’t have considered a 3000 mile job, even for £40k or £50k, 3000 miles is farther than London to Damascus, Syria.
The longest jobs that I ever took, were one from Heathrow to Lincoln, stay overnight in a 4* hotel, paid by the customer, then back to Soho, £800 in the late nineties, followed a couple of weeks later by Windsor to Dublin, Eire, then back to Soho via Northampton for the same eccentric woman, £1000, hotel and ferry paid by her too.
A few months later, she called me and offered me £1800 to drive her to Minden, Germany and back, I demurred, and pushed for £3000, she said that she’d think about it, but didn’t call back.
 
Associate
Joined
22 Aug 2003
Posts
766
Location
Bucks
When our service receptionists are booking in a customer they'll invariably ask "what was the name?". Like the customer used to have a name but they don't any more.
Surely it should be "what is your name?"
 
Man of Honour
Joined
14 Apr 2017
Posts
3,511
Location
London
Exactly this.
"Can I get a coffee"
"No, you're a customer, but you can ask for a coffee, and I can get one for you"

Oh dear, it’s rather fortunate that you weren’t sitting near my wife and I a while back in Le Pont de la Tour, Butlers Wharf at Shad Thames.
She said to the waitress, “I’ll take the sautéed salmon please, and can I get a Kir Royale while we check the wine list?”
 
Soldato
Joined
25 May 2013
Posts
10,137
Location
Kent.
My mum's started saying (for example) "can you ping that to me" when she means email. I never understood "ping" anyway. Unless it's the sound it makes I guess?

I'm guilty of the following:

"You diamond"
"Sick"
"Init"

*hides*
 
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