Son got first job, fair rate for board

It's about taking responsibility, which is a prerequisite of growing up. If you're an adult and earn money you should learn to take responsibility and contribute to the upkeep of your homestead.
 
When I was on £1000 I was giving £110 -
When I was on £800 and in college I paid £70 - but I was feeding myself
I think the extra came from me earning more or electric

My mum didn't put money aside but I would highly recommend it ! For a deposit or maybe a new newer car :) Would be a good blanket if any future money issues
 
What worries me is the apparent need to go to university?

I work in IT and I would be probably worse off in regards to debt.

I don't owe a penny. Don't even think uni would give me anything beneficial anyway. But hey everyone's different.

For what its worth, I work in IT too, have a well paid job, and don't have a degree (although, I am doing one part time with the OU now).

The reason for saving is about choice. Enabling him to have the choice. If he doesn't decide to go to University, he can have it towards a house deposit.

If he decides he wants to be a Doctor/Engineer/whatever he'll need a degree. Working in IT doesn't need a degree in probably 99% of roles.
 
Do you really need the moolah?

If not, I suggest you do charge him £150-200 a month. Put it into an ISA, save it for his wedding / honeymoon costs then he'll learn the importance of budgeting, and you turn out to be the coolest most generous dad in the world :)
 
Very interesting read!

My parents have a different approach to this which i kinda like...

Coming out of University starting out at around 28k a year in Accounting sector parents never asked for money [still live at home with them and just save 80% + of my earnings].

The catch is that my dad tells me that I can always stay in his house hold free of charge only if I save most of the money I earn to put into a deposit for an apartment or a house to rent out.

I kinda like this approach as I have now been saving all my earnings to put towards a deposit on a place to either live in or rent out in the future. This seems to make my dad happy as it puts his mind to rest that I will have something to fall back on in the future.
 
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Very interesting read!

My parents have a different approach to this which i kinda like...

Coming out of University starting out at around 28k a year in Accounting sector parents never asked for money [still live at home with them and just save 80% + of my earnings].

The catch is that my dad tells me that I can always stay in his house hold free of charge only if I save most of the money I earn to put into a deposit for an apartment or a house to rent out.

I kinda like this approach as I have now been saving all my earnings to put towards a deposit on a place to either live in or rent out in the future. This seems to make my dad happy as it puts his mind to rest that I will have something to fall back on in the future.

This looks sensible.

Tell him to pay £200 PCM into a savings account, and say you'll want proof he is doing it.

Subject to him doing that, and helping round the house, he lives rent free.

He learns about saving, gets used to saving, gets used to how hard it is to run a household, everyone wins.
 
It's not a "charge", it's not stopping someone from getting a start in life (although it might be cutting down a little on the weekend party fund or "Top Shop" budget). It's expecting a wage earning adult to make a small contribution which they can afford to the household expenses rather than expecting mummy and daddy to pay for everything.

If you want to be treated as an adult with the respect and rights that comes with you need to take a little responsibility as well. If you're saving every penny to buy a house or perhaps do some kind of professional training then of course it's a different story. If you can afford to go out drinking, run a car, buy fashion clothes, PC, games etc. then it's not unreasonable to expect you to contribute to the household in which you live.

Some parents may genuinely benefit from the contribution after years of "going without" to raise kids, others may not need the money per se but feel it's right for a wage earning adult to contribute and earn the respect that standing on their own two feet brings and others may decide to save the contributions quietly without mentioning it towards helping set the child up when they eventually buy their own place.
 
When I lived at home with my folks and got my first decent paid job

I paid £200 perm month to help pay my way , I didn'y contribute much else in the
way of helping out in the house and I felt it was right to help out with money

My parents were not rich and it was good to help pay my way ,
it probably was best for me as it taught me the value of money , luckily
I didn't end up as a free loader slacker who had a very abrupt reality check
when they left home. It is possible to save for a house deposit and chip in
to help cover your costs when living with your folks.

adjusting for inflation etc that £200 would be £355.56 per month it todays money
 
I just turned 20 and have been at work for 2 years now.
Started off paying I think £75 per month when I first started work (£11.5K a year).
Went up to £100 when I started my 2nd year of work as salary increased to £15.5k.

A year later and I'm now on £19.5k, not quite sure what I'm meant to be paying I think 25% more so £125.. Obviously I wouldn't be happy if it was £200 per month, though I can afford it - I save a lot. Dad was meant to put the money into a savings account but I think its just gone to the mortgage instead.

Property is stupidly expensive I hate to think of moving out. I like this house and don't mind living here 99% of the time, so to start spending several hundred pound a month on rent for somewhere not as nice is something I don't like to think about; but that's reality!
 
nope in the hypothetical scenario the parents are doing fine its just that the son is able to contribute... he happens to earn more than the dad in that scenario but should that matter? Surely the point is that he is able to contribute, is costing them money and so should should cover his share which he can easily afford to do.



I'm sure you visit them too... perhaps not for two months but its a different scenario - they've still got their own home too.



the topic isn't about 'need', the OP hasn't stated that he is in financial difficulties its simply about fairness and what is a fair amount... basically say you're earning money, your parents are paying for things for you because you're living at home - is it fair to contribute to the cost as you're now able to... IMO it is and a fair way to do it is to breakdown some of the bills that will increase with you being there and to make a pro-rata contribution to food/weekly shopping.

I would disagree on that point. If I was living with strangers, then I would completely agree and a fair contribution should be made. If I was living with a friend for an extend period of time (say, greater than a week), then i'm a bit more on the fence but could be persuaded easily enough to agree that a fair contribution should be made. With family? No, I think unless there's a need, a contribution shouldn't be made. That's part of what makes family different from strangers (at least for me). You share everything, spend a bit more when needed, and not while thinking about whose paid for what. If for instance I had the currency and went on a food shop, then i'd spend and not ask them for something back. That could be a monthly shop. If however they went instead, then I wouldn't feel like I need to contribute something.

Of course this would work the same way for people staying with me. Why would I expect a family member staying with me to contribute because a few costs marginally go up? I'm more than happy to have them around and wouldn't think twice about the fact that a few of my costs went up and wouldn't want them to.

I also wouldn't think it was 'unfair' if my parents asked for a bunch of cash to go on holiday or buy a big screen, regardless of where I was living. I'll make sure to support them in maintaining the lifestyle they have, whether or not i'm living with them.
 
Surely once it gets to that point you should consider moving out? I mean depending where in the country you are, that'll almost pay rent for a flat.

It would go towards a crap apartment, yes. Paying someone to buy your food and do your washing done would probably be a significant extra. ;)
 
My kids worked from age 12 after school weekends I never took a penny until adult .
At adult age they become independent they can muck in like the rest of the adult population .If not go rent someware and see how far your cash goes then and I only charged £40 a week
 
That's part of what makes family different from strangers (at least for me). You share everything...
Except it would seem the responsibility of paying for things? Surely as a self respecting wage earning family member you'd expect to contribute to the family household, even if it was only a little rather than have your parents pay for everything for you like you were still a child with no income?. A short term visit to someone is very different thing to being a contributing member of a family household.
 
No, I think unless there's a need, a contribution shouldn't be made. That's part of what makes family different from strangers (at least for me). You share everything, spend a bit more when needed, and not while thinking about whose paid for what.

but taking without contributing isn't sharing... its just taking - if you share everything then you'd be helping with bills too when able to

If for instance I had the currency and went on a food shop, then i'd spend and not ask them for something back. That could be a monthly shop. If however they went instead, then I wouldn't feel like I need to contribute something.

well that is contributing... not a direct financial contribution but if you provide the food shopping regularly enough then you're also contributing which is kind of the point I'm making...
 
I do not see the point in charging children rent, i have a young son and i certainly wont ever be, our family home is his "base".

Everything i own ultimately goes to him anyway, why would i charge him a pointless token sum of money to live under the roof which i maintain anyway? I chose to bring him into the world, i will therefore provide everything he needs including a home.

Thats the way i see it anyway :)
 
Except it would seem the responsibility of paying for things? Surely as a self respecting wage earning family member you'd expect to contribute to the family household, even if it was only a little. A short term visit to someone is very different thing to being a contributing member of a family household.

I consider the family funds as one pot. Whoever wants, dips into them, regardless of where they are located or what it was for. I don't expect to contribute 'just because I can', but do expect to contribute as soon as there is even the slightest need for anything.

I would never want my kids to feel like they need to contribute anything if they lived with me. They would be welcome to stay with me for as long as they wanted to without paying a single penny for anything, unless I needed it.
 
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