I asked my GP that and he said that his cousin has started taking protein shakes etc and it turned out they had trace amounts of steroids, which is maybe why you can see the improvements more easily and quickly.
Creatine is really good but you take it a for month then month off etc otherwise your kidneys will literally explode.
Protein shakes is probably a good starting point, but don't get scammed and buy some ****** very cheap ones.
tbh a really good well balanced diet and working different groups of muscles should just do the trick.
Whilst I appreciate your post was probably in jest and also gave me a good, hard laugh, it's people like you and your GP friend who give people in resistance training regimes, dietary supplements and the whole arena of muscle fitness a bad name, whilst also givi.g ignorami false hopes about hydroxycut, Maximuscle and whatever else claims 'muscle growth'.
I knew there was something wrong after the 6th visit to the toilet by lunch time and being massively scared of farting! 
(supp wise)
