Update:
So today I took the day off work and headed into BMW nice and early and got the locking wheel nut remover, for a whopping £4.11...which for a nut remover is actually quite expensive, but it was needed, so I was happy to pay it. I also popped into Halfords for some more tools to add to my collection...but that is irrelevant.
Anyway. I headed on down to Howard's this morning so we could crack on with the brakes and get them sorted finally.
The tool I borrowed from my brother for the calliper carrier bolts was fine, but it also required what neither of us had...an air ratchet or impact hammer. So after taking the calliper off and not getting anywhere we headed to a local garage who took the pesky bolts off for me and put in the new ones, at a cost of £10.
We then went back to Howard's and got cracking with the brakes. Driver's side took about 20mins total once we'd sorted the carrier bolts. Passenger side was stubborn and so took a bit longer, but it now has shiny new brakes on the front.
We didn't do the rears due to lack of a huge jack or a pillar lift...plus the ground was sodden and we were hungry. The rears don't need doing for a while as the pads and discs have plenty of travel left on them but I ordered it all so I can get it done whenever and know it's all new. I'll be doing the rears over Easter most likely as I'll have the use of my brother's garage once again.
And pictures, I can't be bothered to organise them into what is what, just marvel at me looking like a gimp (and I don't like the band on the hoodie...that's why it's my car work hoodie).