The 5 year plan to £50k
- Thread starter FoxEye
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He's the one whos asked for help then basically done nothing to achieve it. As I said my posts originally were overly harsh so you got off your backside and did something about it.
Now they are just out of ridicule, I don't care if you want a cat, I just find it funny you cant do both at once.
KaHn
Dude, this has nothing to do with being a "man's man", or whatever you think an idealised male stereotype is. You've gone from this:
To this:
In less than 2 months... this comes across as just a teeny bit mad. Can't you sort out your life properly then get 48 cats, or whatever it is you want, instead of living in your mum's house, getting a cat she won't like, and then presumably getting kicked out in a few months anyway?
Just sayin...
To this:
I need a catLiving without a cat is making me increasingly unhappy. This kitteh is going to make life bearable again (assuming it doesn't hate me
) Everything else can wait.
In less than 2 months... this comes across as just a teeny bit mad. Can't you sort out your life properly then get 48 cats, or whatever it is you want, instead of living in your mum's house, getting a cat she won't like, and then presumably getting kicked out in a few months anyway?
Just sayin...
This is GD, only the strong survive this hell hole
Yeah you remember right. No point trying to hide it when there is a search function
Do you want a girlfriend? (Or are you gay?...) because comments like that (the cat thing) are super cringeworthy and the 'whatever' attitude just really isn't gonna get you anywhere..Yeah you remember right. No point trying to hide it when there is a search function
Anyway, I know this thread isn't about cats or girlfriends, but aside from wanting to earn 50k, what else do you hope to have achieved by the time you're let's say, 40? Or 45? Genuinely curious...
Like you said this is kind of derailing the thread so I'll keep it short.
No I'm not gay. Would be easier if I was, I think. If some women was insane enough to find me attractive, I'd see where it led, sure. But I mostly either creep them out or as far as they're concerned I don't exist. In RL I'm really, really nervous and this makes even little things like eye contact actually painful.
Where do I see myself at 40? Same place most likely. I'm kind of a like a guy who's been in prison for 25 years. I would find it hard to cope on my own. Sad, but true.
I think I'm probably being too honest here. Magnolia will love this
... I wouldn't say this to anyone in RL. You guys, for better or worse, are pretty much the only social contact I have. Trust me, I know how this sounds. It sounds like it is. I'm not blind to reality. I just feel like I can't do anything about it. You don't want to be me, or get inside my head. It's a bad place to be.
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Like you said this is kind of derailing the thread so I'll keep it short.
No I'm not gay. Would be easier if I was, I think. If some women was insane enough to find me attractive, I'd see where it led, sure. But I mostly either creep them out or as far as they're concerned I don't exist. In RL I'm really, really nervous and this makes even little things like eye contact actually painful.
Where do I see myself at 40? Same place most likely. I'm kind of a like a guy who's been in prison for 25 years. I would find it hard to cope on my own. Sad, but true.
I think I'm probably being too honest here. Magnolia will love this
... I wouldn't say this to anyone in RL. You guys, for better or worse, are pretty much the only social contact I have. Trust me, I know how this sounds. It sounds like it is. I'm not blind to reality. I just feel like I can't do anything about it. You don't want to be me, or get inside my head. It's a bad place to be.
Go get some help. This is no way to live.
if you never got diagnosed with ASD you should look into itLike you said this is kind of derailing the thread so I'll keep it short.
No I'm not gay. Would be easier if I was, I think. If some women was insane enough to find me attractive, I'd see where it led, sure. But I mostly either creep them out or as far as they're concerned I don't exist. In RL I'm really, really nervous and this makes even little things like eye contact actually painful.
Where do I see myself at 40? Same place most likely. I'm kind of a like a guy who's been in prison for 25 years. I would find it hard to cope on my own. Sad, but true.
I think I'm probably being too honest here. Magnolia will love this
... I wouldn't say this to anyone in RL. You guys, for better or worse, are pretty much the only social contact I have. Trust me, I know how this sounds. It sounds like it is. I'm not blind to reality. I just feel like I can't do anything about it. You don't want to be me, or get inside my head. It's a bad place to be.
Trust me you are more than likely autistic/asperger read the traits for them
http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Autistic-spectrum-disorder/Pages/Symptoms.aspx
You don't need all the traits! everyone is different.
but their are key traits mainly the social avoidance stuff and anxiety
I'd say this list is better than the nhs one
Repetitive behaviors (may want to watch the same program over and over again)
• Unresponsive to commands or questions ("in their own world")
• Delayed speech & language development (non-verbal, especially by age 3)
• Lack of imitation of others or imaginative play
• Indifferent to the feelings of others
• Hypersensitivity to light & sound (covers ears when music is played or covers eyes when going outside)
• Self-stimulatory behaviors (e.g., rocking, jumping up and down, hand flapping)
• Echolalia (Repetition or echoing of a word or phrase just spoken by another person)
• Unusual emotional responses (inappropriate laughing or crying)
• Frequent temper tantrums / meltdowns
• Responds adversely to physical affection, hugs, kisses, etc.
• Shows no interest in making friends
• Does not initiate conversation
• Very poor diet (may eat only starches)
• Frequently walks on tip-toes as a toddler
• Socially withdrawn or socially awkward
• Shows little expressive language
• Clumsiness (falls or trips often)
• Improper use of pronouns, statements, and questions
• Unusual tone or rhythm of speech
• Self Injurious Behavior (head banging, scratching/biting self)
• Frequently makes irrelevant remarks
• Difficulty with abstract language and concepts
• Be preoccupied with one or only a few narrow interests
• Need for sameness (adheres to routines)
• Severe tantrums when routines are disrupted
• Shows an attachment to unusual objects such as car parts, branches, leaves, etc.
• Fascination with spinning objects or spinning one’s self
• Very good at rote memory tasks such as repeating lists of items or facts
• Unresponsive to commands or questions ("in their own world")
• Delayed speech & language development (non-verbal, especially by age 3)
• Lack of imitation of others or imaginative play
• Indifferent to the feelings of others
• Hypersensitivity to light & sound (covers ears when music is played or covers eyes when going outside)
• Self-stimulatory behaviors (e.g., rocking, jumping up and down, hand flapping)
• Echolalia (Repetition or echoing of a word or phrase just spoken by another person)
• Unusual emotional responses (inappropriate laughing or crying)
• Frequent temper tantrums / meltdowns
• Responds adversely to physical affection, hugs, kisses, etc.
• Shows no interest in making friends
• Does not initiate conversation
• Very poor diet (may eat only starches)
• Frequently walks on tip-toes as a toddler
• Socially withdrawn or socially awkward
• Shows little expressive language
• Clumsiness (falls or trips often)
• Improper use of pronouns, statements, and questions
• Unusual tone or rhythm of speech
• Self Injurious Behavior (head banging, scratching/biting self)
• Frequently makes irrelevant remarks
• Difficulty with abstract language and concepts
• Be preoccupied with one or only a few narrow interests
• Need for sameness (adheres to routines)
• Severe tantrums when routines are disrupted
• Shows an attachment to unusual objects such as car parts, branches, leaves, etc.
• Fascination with spinning objects or spinning one’s self
• Very good at rote memory tasks such as repeating lists of items or facts
forum for ASD people
http://www.wrongplanet.net/forums.html
Their life stories will sound very similar to yours, their current situation for the majority will be as you posted above in the parts I bolded.
Have you ever watched the shawshank redemption? how the inmates don't feel like they belong to the world and they no longer fit in? this is basically autism/aspergers.
There's a few of us officially diagnosed on here all likely with equally pathetic lives but content with our own existence.
I did the marriage thing for 11 years though it was her that pointed out I wasn't like everyone else and that made me look into it, found out about autism and suddenly everything in my life made sense.
I've been living alone for the past 2 years in my own flat something I wouldn't have felt able to do but it's amazing how quickly you can fall into a new routine if you can just get over the anxiety, being hesitant and putting off tasks is also another ASD trait something I reckon you know very well
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It's not all about appearance and confidence (but it sure does help a lot.) I think attitude plays a big part in being able to achieve what you want in life. Unfortunately life isn't just about ourselves and what we want. We may need to lie, pretend, do things we don't agree with or may not like in order to achieve what we want.Like you said this is kind of derailing the thread so I'll keep it short.
No I'm not gay. Would be easier if I was, I think. If some women was insane enough to find me attractive, I'd see where it led, sure. But I mostly either creep them out or as far as they're concerned I don't exist. In RL I'm really, really nervous and this makes even little things like eye contact actually painful.
Where do I see myself at 40? Same place most likely. I'm kind of a like a guy who's been in prison for 25 years. I would find it hard to cope on my own. Sad, but true.
I think I'm probably being too honest here. Magnolia will love this
... I wouldn't say this to anyone in RL. You guys, for better or worse, are pretty much the only social contact I have. Trust me, I know how this sounds. It sounds like it is. I'm not blind to reality. I just feel like I can't do anything about it. You don't want to be me, or get inside my head. It's a bad place to be.
'Attitude' could be things like stubbornness, ignorance or negativity. I think you need to stop being so hard on yourself and think more positively/openly about your future and how you want it to be/what changes you need to make.
You'll get plenty of advice (and criticism) on this forum, but from what I've seen in your previous posts etc, your attitude comes across like: 'I don't care what you think, I do/say whatever *I* think is best/right' and that's not really the right attitude to have. Not having a dig, it's just something I've noticed.
This thread is rather sad. I was on your side at the very start, rooting for you, but now I'm just a bit flabbergasted that you haven't been able to do anything positive to move forward. You live at home, have few friends, can't look after yourself properly and haven't had any female contact in ages, if ever. This really isn't a healthy state to be in. Sounds rough, but there are people with severe disabilities who seem more independent than you are right now.
Tough question, but what happens when, not if, but *when* your parents pass away? How will you cope then? Do you have any plans at all?
There are 24 hours in the day, you spend 8 at work, 8 sleeping and the other 8 can change your life if you use them right. Just do *something*; ANYTHING.
Tough question, but what happens when, not if, but *when* your parents pass away? How will you cope then? Do you have any plans at all?
There are 24 hours in the day, you spend 8 at work, 8 sleeping and the other 8 can change your life if you use them right. Just do *something*; ANYTHING.
what do you look like btw?
You have wasted valuable time typing that out.
I'd say this list is better than the nhs one
• Repetitive behaviors (may want to watch the same program over and over again)
When speaking, I often repeat myself. The reason for this is mostly because conversation is so damn hard, if I've already thought of something to say I can say it twice so I'm talking for longer
• Unresponsive to commands or questions ("in their own world")
Not true. If I'm focused on something I can get irritated if interrupted. Does that count?
• Delayed speech & language development (non-verbal, especially by age 3)
No. Learned to read early. Normal early childhood development. Had social difficulties by the time I entered primary school. Did not make friends. My secondary school did call in the shrink a couple times for me thoHe gave me some tests and said I was pretty darn good at them
• Lack of imitation of others or imaginative play
I have no idea how to judge my own imagination. I daydream a lot. I used to play with cars in a sandpit as a child. Mum always says I was an easy child to look after as I entertained myself for hours on end.
• Indifferent to the feelings of others
I wouldn't say that's accurate. I can be indifferent at times. I often don't know how to appropriately deal with other people when upset/angry, and indeed often get it wrong. But I just put that down to bad social skills.
I can lack empathy at times, but isn't that true of most people?
• Hypersensitivity to light & sound (covers ears when music is played or covers eyes when going outside)
I don't like sunlight but I'm not hypersensitive to it, I don't think. In bright sunlight my eyes weep. But that also happens on windy days. I just have weak eyes. I don't like loud noises or loud music at all, but that's because I value my hearing.
• Self-stimulatory behaviors (e.g., rocking, jumping up and down, hand flapping)
Not in this sense, no. I don't like to stand still, that much is true. I move from one leg to the other, or do a little jig, anything but stand still
I do not have any abnormal behaviour in this regard, no hand flapping, no rocking. Just fidgets
• Echolalia (Repetition or echoing of a word or phrase just spoken by another person)
Nope.
• Unusual emotional responses (inappropriate laughing or crying)
Nope. Well, I don't think so. I am a bit emotional at times but that is mostly when I'm tired. I have massive mood swings.
• Frequent temper tantrums / meltdowns
I used to lose my temper a lot because I used to be a jerk. I control it better these days.
• Responds adversely to physical affection, hugs, kisses, etc.
I find physical contact very uncomfortable. But probably because I don't experience it very often.
• Shows no interest in making friends
On the one hand, true. But I'm also conscious of not having friends, and this bothers me. So is it true or not true?
• Does not initiate conversation
Very true. Painfully shy and often walk past people deliberately looking away from them, avoiding eye contact.
• Very poor diet (may eat only starches)
N/A. I don't do much cooking. OK, when I was at uni my diet was awful. Just awful
• Frequently walks on tip-toes as a toddler
Lol. No idea about that.
• Socially withdrawn or socially awkward
Very true.
• Shows little expressive language
Hmm, I'm quite good with language.
• Clumsiness (falls or trips often)
Nope, not at all. I have good balance and normal motor function.
• Improper use of pronouns, statements, and questions
Nope, I'm good with grammar. Just not spelling
• Unusual tone or rhythm of speech
Nope, my speeach is normal.
• Self Injurious Behavior (head banging, scratching/biting self)
Nope.
• Frequently makes irrelevant remarks
Nope.
• Difficulty with abstract language and concepts
Nope?
• Be preoccupied with one or only a few narrow interests
Hmm. Could be true. OK probably true.
• Need for sameness (adheres to routines)
Nope, I don't have a routine. I get up at different times and no two days are alike in that respect.
• Severe tantrums when routines are disrupted
See above, nope.
• Shows an attachment to unusual objects such as car parts, branches, leaves, etc.
Nope.
• Fascination with spinning objects or spinning one’s self
Lol, nope.
• Very good at rote memory tasks such as repeating lists of items or facts
Nope. My memory is oh so poor.
I'm looked at all those questions/bullet points and answered with full honesty. I'm pretty sure I don't fit that profile well.
To be honest I've done self-tests for ASD before and always concluded it does not describe me.
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