**The Mental Health Thread**

Psymonkee said:
Yep - RSD is definitely something I've (unknowingly) been struggling with for a number of years. Namely some crazy over reaction to something very minor followed by me going off the deep end/shutting everyone else out for hours/days/weeks until I could rationalise things again.

It kinda sucks but it's nice to have a description of what I'm struggling with.
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recently came across it and fits me to a T. Really hard to deal with, find it very draining.
 
Wow my Anxiety has cranked up to new levels today I feel ruddy awful. No idea if this is Withdrawal or Anxiety reoccurrence although it’s been almost 4 months since I stopped the Escitalopram so would think it’s my Anxiety. I feel awful unable to sit still for long, racing thoughts and keep going really hot but shivering in my legs.

I think I may need to re-instate the Escitalopram but after reading the horror stories on Dr Google I’m a tad scared if I’m honest…..

Think I will give the Dr a call on Monday and get some advice and see what they think….
 
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Found my self being irritable and stressed more. I have been in more of a stressful job for the past year so i thought it was just that. I tried stopping coffee, was only having one a day. I feel so much more calmer in general which is amazing compared to feeling groggy most of the time. I do love the taste of a good coffee though but for the foreseeable i think i’ll only drink it on weekends or holidays.
 
MOOGLEYS said:
Wow my Anxiety has cranked up to new levels today I feel ruddy awful. No idea if this is Withdrawal or Anxiety reoccurrence although it’s been almost 4 months since I stopped the Escitalopram so would think it’s my Anxiety. I feel awful unable to sit still for long, racing thoughts and keep going really hot but shivering in my legs.

I think I may need to re-instate the Escitalopram but after reading the horror stories on Dr Google I’m a tad scared if I’m honest…..

Think I will give the Dr a call on Monday and get some advice and see what they think….
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I'm definitely not a professional so do give your doctor a call, but just an idea - maybe lean into the anxiety a bit? It's going turbo and you're reacting to it. Maybe, acknowledge it "holy poop I'm anxious - thanks for trying to keep me safe, anxiety, but I now need you to STFU" and go about your day as if you weren't feeling so anxious.

You don't need to 'distract' yourself from it, you just need things to occupy your mind in a way that may indirectly take the edge off (not at first, but over time). Go to a football game if that's your sort of thing. Or go and see a friend in a public place. Or on a walk somewhere with a lot of nature. Basically, somewhere there is a lot of things to observe. Just a way of buying your mind a little bit of space.

I say this as in my own experience, anxiety is something best defeated by doing things that are counter-intuitive. It cannot be defeated... but it can go away over time, if you indirectly encourage it to. But throwing spears at it makes it stick around :p

I hope it gets a little easier for you!
 
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Nitefly said:
I'm definitely not a professional so do give your doctor a call, but just an idea - maybe lean into the anxiety a bit? It's going turbo and you're reacting to it. Maybe, acknowledge it "holy poop I'm anxious - thanks for trying to keep me safe, anxiety, but I now need you to STFU" and go about your day as if you weren't feeling so anxious.

You don't need to 'distract' yourself from it, you just need things to occupy your mind in a way that may indirectly take the edge off (not at first, but over time). Go to a football game if that's your sort of thing. Or go and see a friend in a public place. Or on a walk somewhere with a lot of nature. Basically, somewhere there is a lot of things to observe. Just a way of buying your mind a little bit of space.

I say this as in my own experience, anxiety is something best defeated by doing things that are counter-intuitive. It cannot be defeated... but it can go away over time, if you indirectly encourage it to. But throwing spears at it makes it stick around :p

I hope it gets a little easier for you!
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Thanks mate that’s actually very good advice and I will take on board.

I think I’m in the feeling so awful I would happily take or do anything to help phase which is not very good as I really want to stay of the meds if I can. I’m so confused as wether what I’m getting is rebound or withdrawal or just a new flare up of symptoms.

Having done so well for 4 months med free and tapering the Escitalopram before it’s a big kick in the nuts when it all flares up.

It’s never an easy journey is mental health.
 
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MOOGLEYS said:
Thanks mate that’s actually very good advice and I will take on board.

I think I’m in the feeling so awful I would happily take or do anything to help phase which is not very good as I really want to stay of the meds if I can. I’m so confused as wether what I’m getting is rebound or withdrawal or just a new flare up of symptoms.

Having done so well for 4 months med free and tapering the Escitalopram before it’s a big kick in the nuts when it all flares up.

It’s never an easy journey is mental health.
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I hear you - it can be a big bag of balls!

Just some misc. thoughts to add…

I always find it worst when I become the emotion (anxiety / fear / sadness) - it is so overwhelming that it’s impossible to see beyond it. It’s akin to holding a piece of paper to your face saying “problem”. When it’s really close, all you can see is the “problem”, so that’s all your mind can work with. Really easy to get stuck in a rut… you can’t ‘outthink it’ or ‘feel out’ of it… it’s just… there and inescapable. I totally understand the sense of desperation you’re inferring.

But we (me as well!) should take comfort that it’s an emotional and logical fallacy - because you are not the emotion. When you feel like that it’s a case of saying “huh, ok this really has a grip on me for now - with a bit of space and time I will be able to think and feel other things, if only for a bit.”

As mentioned, you have to tweak your activities to give your mind an opportunity to move elsewhere - the opportunity to “move that piece of paper away from your eyes”. Suddenly it’s further away… oh, I can now see other things in the room… what are those…?

My personal ‘hack’ is to take the emotion, imagine it as a photograph / picture, then ‘mentally’ hang it up on the wall and pretend to look at it as if I’m in an art gallery… give it a bit of time, thank that for the insight, then move on to an ‘energy consuming’ activity (exercise, building something, being around people) that requires a little concentration and attention. I often, but not always, find that I do actually feel quite differently during those activities so long as I’ve given the so-called ‘inescapable emotion’ some attention first… as if it’s a golden retriever that just needs a bit of a fuss.

Then when you realise you can feel differently… bank that mother ****er! It’s proof that those episodes are a ‘mind glitch’. Realising that, it’s easier to break out of those cycles going forward… but you’ve got to keep moving forward, keeping active and doing things - living, or it can take over.

Time and space for the mind, that’s the key.

… uh, well that was a bit of a ramble, I think I probably feel good about dispensing things that I’ve learned, more so than I’m good at managing myself :o :p
 
MOOGLEYS said:
Wow my Anxiety has cranked up to new levels today I feel ruddy awful. No idea if this is Withdrawal or Anxiety reoccurrence although it’s been almost 4 months since I stopped the Escitalopram so would think it’s my Anxiety. I feel awful unable to sit still for long, racing thoughts and keep going really hot but shivering in my legs.

I think I may need to re-instate the Escitalopram but after reading the horror stories on Dr Google I’m a tad scared if I’m honest…..

Think I will give the Dr a call on Monday and get some advice and see what they think….
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Google is the worst thing you can look at when it comes to medications etc. See your doc my friend. Dont believe half of what you read on the net.
 
Nitefly said:
I hear you - it can be a big bag of balls!

Just some misc. thoughts to add…

I always find it worst when I become the emotion (anxiety / fear / sadness) - it is so overwhelming that it’s impossible to see beyond it. It’s akin to holding a piece of paper to your face saying “problem”. When it’s really close, all you can see is the “problem”, so that’s all your mind can work with. Really easy to get stuck in a rut… you can’t ‘outthink it’ or ‘feel out’ of it… it’s just… there and inescapable. I totally understand the sense of desperation you’re inferring.

But we (me as well!) should take comfort that it’s an emotional and logical fallacy - because you are not the emotion. When you feel like that it’s a case of saying “huh, ok this really has a grip on me for now - with a bit of space and time I will be able to think and feel other things, if only for a bit.”

As mentioned, you have to tweak your activities to give your mind an opportunity to move elsewhere - the opportunity to “move that piece of paper away from your eyes”. Suddenly it’s further away… oh, I can now see other things in the room… what are those…?

My personal ‘hack’ is to take the emotion, imagine it as a photograph / picture, then ‘mentally’ hang it up on the wall and pretend to look at it as if I’m in an art gallery… give it a bit of time, thank that for the insight, then move on to an ‘energy consuming’ activity (exercise, building something, being around people) that requires a little concentration and attention. I often, but not always, find that I do actually feel quite differently during those activities so long as I’ve given the so-called ‘inescapable emotion’ some attention first… as if it’s a golden retriever that just needs a bit of a fuss.

Then when you realise you can feel differently… bank that mother ****er! It’s proof that those episodes are a ‘mind glitch’. Realising that, it’s easier to break out of those cycles going forward… but you’ve got to keep moving forward, keeping active and doing things - living, or it can take over.

Time and space for the mind, that’s the key.

… uh, well that was a bit of a ramble, I think I probably feel good about dispensing things that I’ve learned, more so than I’m good at managing myself :o :p
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Thanks mate it all helps. It’s not nice knowing others have to go through this but also nice knowing others have gone through it and understand how it feels.

I just feel awful at the moment my head pressure is intense and I just feel unwell but in a mental way. If I distract myself I feel a better until the brain re-Engadges. I’m struggling with relaxing but now getting very tired due to lack of decent sleep. It’s a horrid vicious circle.

Im now regretting stopping the meds as maybe they were helping more than I thought although on them was not smooth sailing the disturbed sleep was really horrid at times and needed more meds to help control.

I just wanted to be med free and allow my body to heal and control things by itself. But I’m not sure now this is going to be an option unless this is some big temporary blip that will pass soon.

Please dispense away it’s really helpful.
 
koolpc said:
Google is the worst thing you can look at when it comes to medications etc. See your doc my friend. Dont believe half of what you read on the net.
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Yeah I have scared myself silly with Dr Google lately which is probably half my problem I need to know too much information sometimes. Health Anxiety is a bitch especially In this day and age with the internet feeding all sorts of info…..
 
MOOGLEYS said:
I just feel awful at the moment my head pressure is intense and I just feel unwell but in a mental way. If I distract myself I feel a better until the brain re-Engadges. I’m struggling with relaxing but now getting very tired due to lack of decent sleep. It’s a horrid vicious circle.
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I have that 'mode switching' a lot - what I take from it is that I'm too sensitive/intolerant to whatever the 'difficult thing' is (or whatever that is that I'm facing). Then, it's a case of becoming tolerant to it in the right way - that is, emotionally.

"Hey - I notice that I'm prone to anxiety whenever my mind wonders to (a) certain topic(s). Those topics [which could just be 'nothing going on'] feel really hard for me. I'm going to sit on these feelings a bit and give them space, then move onto engaging with something else."

... to try and bring and end to it, rather than sit there swirling and whirling away. If I can't become tolerant to it, it's like a massive spider entering the room. Every time it comes along, I run away... which actually just reinforces that the spider is scary and that I will find safety in dodging it

Admittedly, I'm not very good at this. If I'm sat there swirling and whirling, I tend to have to express it to break the tension (typically by talking about it). What I'm trying to get better at just internalising, letting go of strong emotions, moving onwards without those things being events. The aim is that it'll become easier in time.

And, in the meantime, I'm focussing on fitness goals, which is helping me feel more comfortable in myself regardless. So... just patience I guess!
 
I could never have imagined ever suffering from anxiety and depression but was hit very hard by both a few months ago.

Up until covid which resulted in having to close my business myself and my wife were living the dream. We wanted for nothing and had a very comfortable and fun life (we started with very little in life, both lost most of our immediate family, begged and borrowed but worked very hard to achieve success). It took a few months and eventually got back on my feet in business but still nowhere near where we were, which is fine and know things will improve but in the meantime my confidence took a massive hit which eventually pushed me into deep depression and terrible anxiety.

One day everything became so much I seriously considered suicide which resulted in phoning the doctor who referred me to a local free service to help deal with my issues. We did zoom calls every couple of weeks and they provided me with some great mechanics which helped enormously. The best methods included a) setting a certain time of day aside for worry time and in the meantime focus on normal and more positive tasks b) identifying what are practical worries (problem solving really) and what are hypothetical worries (things that may well never even happen) - I’ve always done this c) getting back in the gym d) problem solving - write down a few solutions and include a couple of ridiculous ones which helps focus on the more effective and realistic solutions. All these helped massively

The doctor prescribed me some beta blockers (not even sure what they’re called). I only ever took 1 and after that promised myself I wouldn’t rely on meds. I acknowledge it’s not that simple for many

Over time I realised that whilst I always believed we had a great marriage, things had become a bit stale including in the bedroom. I shrugged this off believing that was just normal but after a while kept telling myself that no, it doesn’t have to be that way, especially as we’d had great sex for many years.

Anyhow it got to the point where I sat down and told her exactly how I felt and whilst she was massively supportive during my dark times, she admitted that it was my condition that put her off sex and said it felt like living with a little boy. I know that sounds very unsupportive but appreciated her honesty. She told me how she always considered me an alpha male, strong and protective. Initially this really upset me so the next day I took a long hard look at myself and admitted that over time I’d lost my mojo and could have made more effort in certain areas. Once this clicked, I felt like a new person and promised myself I’d make her proud of me once again and get back to who I was. This was only a couple of weeks ago and each day I feel so much stronger mentally and far more capable of dealing with difficulties. I honestly feel that I am cured of my depression and anxiety. No matter what life throws at me, I am never going back to that dark place. I’m glad it happened though as it made me a stronger person.

Myself and my wife are already becoming more affectionate, helping each other more and back to a healthy sex life, which makes me feel more appreciated and less ‘invisible‘

I fully acknowledge people here have probably had far worse issues to deal with and it’s not a simple fix but thought I’d mention my story in the hope it may offer even a little help
 
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Unisol Magic said:
I could never have imagined ever suffering from anxiety and depression but was hit very hard by both a few months ago.

Up until covid which resulted in having to close my business myself and my wife were living the dream. We wanted for nothing and had a very comfortable and fun life (we started with very little in life, both lost most of our immediate family, begged and borrowed but worked very hard to achieve success). It took a few months and eventually got back on my feet in business but still nowhere near where we were, which is fine and know things will improve but in the meantime my confidence took a massive hit which eventually pushed me into deep depression and terrible anxiety.

One day everything became so much I seriously considered suicide which resulted in phoning the doctor who referred me to a local free service to help deal with my issues. We did zoom calls every couple of weeks and they provided me with some great mechanics which helped enormously. The best methods included a) setting a certain time of day aside for worry time and in the meantime focus on normal and more positive tasks b) identifying what are practical worries (problem solving really) and what are hypothetical worries (things that may well never even happen) - I’ve always done this c) getting back in the gym d) problem solving - write down a few solutions and include a couple of ridiculous ones which helps focus on the more effective and realistic solutions. All these helped massively

The doctor prescribed me some beta blockers (not even sure what they’re called). I only ever took 1 and after that promised myself I wouldn’t rely on meds. I acknowledge it’s not that simple for many

Over time I realised that whilst I always believed we had a great marriage, things had become a bit stale including in the bedroom. I shrugged this off believing that was just normal but after a while kept telling myself that no, it doesn’t have to be that way, especially as we’d had great sex for many years.

Anyhow it got to the point where I sat down and told her exactly how I felt and whilst she was massively supportive during my dark times, she admitted that it was my condition that put her off sex and said it felt like living with a little boy. I know that sounds very unsupportive but appreciated her honesty. She told me how she always considered me an alpha male, strong and protective. Initially this really upset me so the next day I took a long hard look at myself and admitted that over time I’d lost my mojo and could have made more effort in certain areas. Once this clicked, I felt like a new person and promised myself I’d make her proud of me once again and get back to who I was. This was only a couple of weeks ago and each day I feel so much stronger mentally and far more capable of dealing with difficulties. I honestly feel that I am cured of my depression and anxiety. No matter what life throws at me, I am never going back to that dark place. I’m glad it happened though as it made me a stronger person.

Myself and my wife are already becoming more affectionate, helping each other more and back to a healthy sex life, which makes me feel more appreciated and less ‘invisible‘

I fully acknowledge people here have probably had far worse issues to deal with and it’s not a simple fix but thought I’d mention my story in the hope it may offer even a little help
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Perspective always helps, even if your situation is different to others someone can always take something out of it.

My home situation is a bit different, the chicken and egg are reversed compared to your situation by the sounds of it. Last year I hit a wall leaving me feeling very down, lonely and feeling pretty unloved. Earlier this year I managed to pick myself up a bit and start to pull myself out of it. I’ve learned to like/love myself a bit more and don’t feel as dependent on my partner for happiness as a result.
 
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