**The Mental Health Thread**

[inflames]

Hi all,

Well yesterday i walked into work and had 3 uncontrollable crying breakdowns right in the middle of the shop floor, talk about feeling embarrassed is an understatement been awake since 4.45 thinking about yesterday.

Work sent me home and have been to docs so currently got time to sort my head out.

I need to get this of my chest maybe this is why i feel so low most of the time and worry about the kids in the future.

Parents split
My granddad died so moved in with my Nan to look after her at 13 years old.
Mom got another boyfriend who she later married, they drank a lot, argued, fought i remember seeing her get dragged with arm in car down the road trying to hold on to him.
Mom had a new boyfriend (He was an ex con) Raped my sister, turned my mom into a drug user and got sent down.
My Nan the actual person that directed me down the right path, died of cancer.
Lost contact with my mom when she finally hit the heroin, we had to split away to save my little family.
Got back in touch with my mom after hearing the news she made it clean, we seen each other for a few years, but she died last year to due to smoking and drinking to much over the years.
The wife was sexually abused by her dad from a young age, so she has to cope with this and can have very very bad days sometimes. ( She so strong its unreal, never goes out milking it just fights it herself)

Anyway sorry for posting all this, its a funny old world i think with holding all this issues in over the years and with being bored doing the same thing at work ,enough was enough and cracked, manage to talk to main bosses and explain they said i could move about if need be, they was amazing.

Dont be scared to let you emotions out lads it does you the world of good.

Clubb699

I can't comment on what you have been through, no one needs to deal with that, at a young age. I broke down at work on tuesday myself so understand the feeling embarrassed, but i felt better afterwards and have started to talk about of own problems with family and few select friends its helped me a lot already. It was my bosses daughter who works in admin, i was the first in and she came to say hi, asked me if i was ok. I replied with no please leave me alone, she came back 5 mins with a cup of coffee to ask me again as she was concerned and i just broke. It nothing to be embarrassed about.

 

[clubb699]

@clubb699

Sorry to hear about what you've been through in the past and what you're presently going through. That's one heck of a ride that would test anyone's mental strength.

With regard to letting emotions out. I agree with you in principle. But speaking from my own experiences, in practice letting your raw emotions out as a man can (not always) result in a loss of respect from those around you. I've experienced anxiety on and off for over a decade and on the occasions when it has been overwhelming, and I've opened up to a partner, its resulted in the end of the realtionship. Ok, so perhaps I have a bad taste in women, bad luck or both. But still, even in today's supposedly more enlightened society, where more info exists pertaining specifically to male mental health, it's a shame that many people are still unable to get over the old belief that a man should always be strong and never succumb to his emotions.

Speaking personally, and this will likely be detrimental to me in the future, I never plan upon being as open about emotions as I have been in the past. Certainly in the context of relationships.

Thank you tek,

What a shame that your ex left after you opened up, i feel deep down some people cant take problems on and they run off scared, sounds like this is what happened to you.

Proud that you moved on and are prepared for the future well done to you.

 

[clubb699]

I can't comment on what you have been through, no one needs to deal with that, at a young age. I broke down at work on tuesday myself so understand the feeling embarrassed, but i felt better afterwards and have started to talk about of own problems with family and few select friends its helped me a lot already. It was my bosses daughter who works in admin, i was the first in and she came to say hi, asked me if i was ok. I replied with no please leave me alone, she came back 5 mins with a cup of coffee to ask me again as she was concerned and i just broke. It nothing to be embarrassed about.

Thank you, inflames its been a strange life i am stuck at the moment but will try my best to wipe it all away. Got a lovely family i need to support them.

Yeah its certainly a strange feeling when it happens hey its quite scary and very uncontrollable at the time.

 

[Tony Edwards]

My heart goes out to all of you that suffer from uncontrolable depression and/or anxiety and other mental health issues and also to those that live with those effected by it.

I wonder if any of you might be interested in this study.

https://www.theguardian.com/society...ought-for-largest-ever-uk-study-of-depression

Genetic links to anxiety and depression are to be explored in the largest ever study into the issue, experts have announced.

Researchers are calling on people in England to sign up to the Genetic Links to Anxiety and Depression (Glad) study. It is hoped that 40,000 volunteers aged 16 and over will agree to be part of a database which will be used in future research studies to better understand the genetic aspects of mental health conditions.

The project, by the National Institute for Health Research BioResource and King’s College London, will see people with anxiety or depression enrol online and send a saliva sample by post.

“By recruiting 40,000 volunteers willing to be re-contacted for research, the Glad study will take us further than ever before,” said study lead Dr Gerome Breen, a geneticist at King’s College London.

“It will allow researchers to solve the big unanswered questions, address how genes and environment act together and help develop new treatment options.”

While it might not help those that suffer at the moment much, it might help those that will suffer in the future.

 

[bulb66]

After a few months off meds and no counselling, the thoughts of self doubt and depression have returned .

Overwhelmed with anxiety right now, I hate large crowds and 1 to 1 situations and I have to spend this week at a trade show at the NEC I just feel sick thinking about it .

Why can't I just be happy

 

[nicktay2605]

I'm sorry to hear about that bulb, how come you've stopped taking meds and seeing a counsellor?

Those of you who have suffered with depression, was the first step to getting better accepting you have an issue and then seeking help from a doctor? Since leaving uni six years ago my outlook on life has gradually deteriorated. I used to be a happy, confident and outgoing guy, now I have very poor confidence and self-esteem, I struggle to approach women despite being told by female friends that I'm decent looking and a nice person, and I feel like I'm emotionally dead inside. I'm able to pretend that I'm cheerful or enjoying something, but it's pretty rare that I'll genuinely be happy or having fun, and I find I am frequently exhausted, even if I've been sleeping well.

I've not opened up to friends or family about my mental health. My dad is a very old-fashioned guy, he was brought up by parents who believed that men should always be strong, stoical and stick to the 'stiff upper lip' British mentality, and I think that's rubbed off on me. Also, my brother suffers from BPD so my parents and mutual friends have spent quite a bit of time and effort helping him through tough times and I've never wanted to burden them and give them reason to worry about me. However, it's now getting to the point where I'm suffering with day-to-day life and I've finally accepted that I need help.

 

[itchy]

I have loads of tenacity but sometimes its hard to keep a grip.

I would not call it depression or anxiety, not sure its a strange feeling.

I am a nice person when around people I know, but with strangers who tick me off I go nuts and say the most inappropriate things. Which can lead to violence but I always try to win with words, although I only have 3 knuckles left on my right hand.
Could go the doctors but I don't want to be on **** pills as I like my head on the ball so to say. But is my ball rolling or steadfast.

To everyone suffering bulldog it, as its the only way.

 

[clubb699]

After a few months off meds and no counselling, the thoughts of self doubt and depression have returned .

Overwhelmed with anxiety right now, I hate large crowds and 1 to 1 situations and I have to spend this week at a trade show at the NEC I just feel sick thinking about it .

Why can't I just be happy

I feel your pain, some days i can stand in a group of 5 people having a laugh, some days i stand in front of 1 person and can completely go red and burn up hope it goes well for you.

I'm sorry to hear about that bulb, how come you've stopped taking meds and seeing a counsellor?

Those of you who have suffered with depression, was the first step to getting better accepting you have an issue and then seeking help from a doctor? Since leaving uni six years ago my outlook on life has gradually deteriorated. I used to be a happy, confident and outgoing guy, now I have very poor confidence and self-esteem, I struggle to approach women despite being told by female friends that I'm decent looking and a nice person, and I feel like I'm emotionally dead inside. I'm able to pretend that I'm cheerful or enjoying something, but it's pretty rare that I'll genuinely be happy or having fun, and I find I am frequently exhausted, even if I've been sleeping well.

I've not opened up to friends or family about my mental health. My dad is a very old-fashioned guy, he was brought up by parents who believed that men should always be strong, stoical and stick to the 'stiff upper lip' British mentality, and I think that's rubbed off on me. Also, my brother suffers from BPD so my parents and mutual friends have spent quite a bit of time and effort helping him through tough times and I've never wanted to burden them and give them reason to worry about me. However, it's now getting to the point where I'm suffering with day-to-day life and I've finally accepted that I need help.

I say yes nicktay, it took me 30 years to actually realise i have suffered with Depression and anxiety issues, i last seen a Councillor one and half years ago and it worked for to certain degree for some of the issues , today i went to see a psychologist for the first time gave him my list of stuff that has gone on, he said WOW, i am excited for next week to start the heeling process after all over these years wish i found him sooner.

What i will say, you need to get the right person to sort out your problems this is important, for me the first person helped out a lot but it was clearly not enough, today was a deeper interrogation 40 mins to drag all the problems out.

Good luck and well done for noticing a problem go get yourself sorted.

Clubb699

 

[Nodiggidy123]

ive just been to doctor for depression which i now have a prescription and ive booked cbt counselling.

 

[Stolly]

New to this thread but ive just mustered up the courage to leave my fiancee, she has schizo affective disorder and recently weve been fighting a lot and her illness seems to be showing signs of surfacing. To top this off ive just been to doctor as the weight of trying to keep her sane has pushed me to depression which i now have a prescription and ive booked cbt counselling. The last few days in particular have been hell and just when i think we are making a breakthrough like today. Bang and something else makes her kick off. Althougg she has never been violent she rages and screams blaming me for everything. Today i couldn't take it anymore.

That sounds tough. As a survivor of a similar toxic relationship I can say you have done the right thing. Some people have no right to be in a relationship. Sad but true.

I’m meaning the unwell person here, just to be clear, not you or me

 

[Nodiggidy123]

.

 

[goatwack]

Is anyone in receipt of any benefits I’m trying to get esa and pip Nd I keep getting knocked back and sick notes are really hard to get

 

[ninjabib]

Anyone here ever had Depersonlisation disorder? It's the worst. Wondering how anyone got through it.

 

[JonnyT]

Had a bit of an incident last Saturday which hit my already fragile self esteem somewhat hard.

I went out for a couple in town (small market town l) and put some jukebox songs on and was chilling with a pint in one of the booths in one of the pubs and some female comes up and starts taking the **** out of my choices and the fact that I was there on my own. I let her finish and then went to tell her views weren't appreciated politely but firmly and she started whining that I was being aggressive (!)

 

[clubb699]

Anyone here ever had Depersonalize disorder? It's the worst. Wondering how anyone got through it.

Hi ya Ninja,

Yes i get it had it really bad from 10 years old onwards, i thought i was crazy and i was the only one getting this but back in the day no internet and talking about stuff was just not the thing to do i suppose. Its haunted me on and off all my life, i sort of live with it now knowing it cant harm me just makes me feel very odd detached from life.

I had a bad one 3 weeks ago really bad, worst one for a few years, got detached for a good few seconds but brought myself back i sort of shake my head and think of something else.

It can be brought on when your worried or down in the dumps , your the first person i have actually come across that has mentioned it, i have tried talking to people at work about it but they think i am crazy lol

I have been seeing a Psychiatrist the last few weeks and been told i have anxiety and depression disorder due to all the crap i had to go through on and off my life, i mentioned about the above to the Dr about the Depersonalization problem and it all falls in to the Anxiety depression or major trauma area .

If you wanna talk about it just say will try my best to help you

Clubb699

 

[clubb699]

Had a bit of an incident last Saturday which hit my already fragile self esteem somewhat hard.

I went out for a couple in town (small market town l) and put some jukebox songs on and was chilling with a pint in one of the booths in one of the pubs and some female comes up and starts taking the **** out of my choices and the fact that I was there on my own. I let her finish and then went to tell her views weren't appreciated politely but firmly and she started whining that I was being aggressive (!)

Some people are just beellllends seems like you met one, just ignore her and move on we all cant like the same things in life, life would be very boring if we did

 

[ninjabib]

Hi ya Ninja,

Yes i get it had it really bad from 10 years old onwards, i thought i was crazy and i was the only one getting this but back in the day no internet and talking about stuff was just not the thing to do i suppose. Its haunted me on and off all my life, i sort of live with it now knowing it cant harm me just makes me feel very odd detached from life.

I had a bad one 3 weeks ago really bad, worst one for a few years, got detached for a good few seconds but brought myself back i sort of shake my head and think of something else.

It can be brought on when your worried or down in the dumps , your the first person i have actually come across that has mentioned it, i have tried talking to people at work about it but they think i am crazy lol

I have been seeing a Psychiatrist the last few weeks and been told i have anxiety and depression disorder due to all the crap i had to go through on and off my life, i mentioned about the above to the Dr about the Depersonalization problem and it all falls in to the Anxiety depression or major trauma area .

If you wanna talk about it just say will try my best to help you

Clubb699

HI Clubb,

Thats what im doing (therapy). Went through a traumatic accident 18 month ago and suffered a TBI (traumatic brain injury) have physically recovered now but it gave me PTSD and Depersonalisation Disorder.

I too thought i was going crazy. It feels like someone has taken my body hostage and i am floating in the sky a few feet behind my physical being. I am trying to kill the hostage taker to get my body(life) back but i just cannot! It gets very frustrating and scary.

I too told no one about it until 4 months ago as i felt i was going insane and they would lock me up so i became suicidal but i've turned the corner. It is the worst thing ever, even worse than the PTSD.

MY therapist said the same, its born out of PTSD so when i am largely over that the personalisation will slowly go away.


Glad to hear ytou have learned to cope with it

 

[clubb699]

HI Clubb,

Thats what im doing (therapy). Went through a traumatic accident 18 month ago and suffered a TBI (traumatic brain injury) have physically recovered now but it gave me PTSD and Depersonalisation Disorder.

I too thought i was going crazy. It feels like someone has taken my body hostage and i am floating in the sky a few feet behind my physical being. I am trying to kill the hostage taker to get my body(life) back but i just cannot! It gets very frustrating and scary.

I too told no one about it until 4 months ago as i felt i was going insane and they would lock me up so i became suicidal but i've turned the corner. It is the worst thing ever, even worse than the PTSD.

MY therapist said the same, its born out of PTSD so when i am largely over that the personalisation will slowly go away.


Glad to hear ytou have learned to cope with it

Sorry to here about that ninjabib,

Glad the physical side has healed for you that is some great positive news, asking for help was definitely the right thing to do remember one step at a time and remember the feeling does not harm you it just feels odd, let it pass and carry on i think time is the healer here.

Thanks Ninja keep me updated in the future wish you all the best.

 

[ninjabib]

Yes i understand now. Just this week hes given some tips to gorund myself and already feel better if not fully cured. It's amazing what the mind can do when its in survival mode.

Sorry to hear of your other issues too, i'm rooting for you. Take care

 

[bulb66]

So after a few months on being "better" things have made a turn for the worse.

I left a job I hated (environment and people) back in May, and started working at a place doing basically my hobby at the time I loved it but the problem was it was an 1hr and 30min drive to and from work. This combined with the dark morning has given me terrible anxiety and I've started phoning in sick, I've been honest with my boss but I worried I am going to get the sack which I just don't think I could handle.

When I'm not at work I hardly leave the house, I just feel anxious about myself and my surroundings.

I'm so lost in my thoughts I don't know what to do.