The possible end of Neogaf?

Vonhelmet said:
Classic victim blaming, but I'd expect nothing less. She says she had a boyfriend and wasn't interested. Why would you assume a woman would be flirting with a man? What weird world do you live in where a woman can't sit in a car with a man without flirting with him?
Click to expand...

How the hell did you get from what i said to victim blaming? Are you one of these Antifa idiots marching the streets of the US?

I'm not blaming anybody.. im playing devils advocate.. She was with another man (not her boyfriend) Driving around the country, getting drunk, staying in a hotel room with, bathroom door unlocked..

I say she flirts because i know women.. And anyone who says that women don't naturally flirt with men they are friendly with are absolutely lying to themselves..
 
Vonhelmet said:
It does make me think that if you're going to share a hotel room with someone of the opposite sex then unless it has been made abundantly clear that sex is not on the agenda, someone's probably going to try their luck, and it's probably going to be the man.

I would also say that I'm not sure that constitutes sexual assault or harassment or whatever, but given that most of those offences depend on how scared or threatened the victim feels, that's not really for me to judge.
Click to expand...

The level of "scaredness" is not a barometer on how severely they should be punished.. Dude you really are one of these thought police types aren't you..
 
Let's be honest lads, how many times have many of us ended up having drunken sex and then sheepishly parted ways in the morning? I mean the staggering home, holding each other up type of encounter, not deliberately stalking and raping someone.

It's pretty terrifying that years down the line you might be accused of sexual abuse or rape, especially if you become quite well known. You know that you're automatically guilty and will be hung, drawn and quartered regardless of what you say to defend yourself.

Maybe the rule now is, yes means no. No means no. At least it'll reduce the population. :D
 
terley said:
I'm not blaming anybody.. im playing devils advocate.. She was with another man (not her boyfriend) Driving around the country, getting drunk, staying in a hotel room with, bathroom door unlocked..
Click to expand...

So does that somehow make it OK to escalate it from no sex to full on naked getting into the shower with her? If not then so what?

It is a full on socially inept move, not only would you have to have completely misread the signs but also just the idea of instigating something from there having been nothing to full on getting naked in the shower is a dubious thing to do. The boyfriend is irrelevant here, I don't personally care if a girl has a "boyfriend" or is dating someone (engaged/married or living as though they were is different though IMO) but jeeze there are ways to escalate this stuff... like some mutual flirting, contact... see if it is reciprocated, lean in for a kiss etc.. not take your clothes off and jump in the shower uninvited!
 
terley said:
The level of "scaredness" is not a barometer on how severely they should be punished.. Dude you really are one of these thought police types aren't you..
Click to expand...
The legal test of assault and harassment is whether the victim is fearful. I didn't make that rule.
 
terley said:
How the hell did you get from what i said to victim blaming? Are you one of these Antifa idiots marching the streets of the US?
Click to expand...

Wut.

terley said:
I'm not blaming anybody.. im playing devils advocate.. She was with another man (not her boyfriend) Driving around the country, getting drunk, staying in a hotel room with, bathroom door unlocked..
Click to expand...

That's not playing devil's advocate.

terley said:
I say she flirts because i know women.. And anyone who says that women don't naturally flirt with men they are friendly with are absolutely lying to themselves..
Click to expand...
She was probably wearing a short skirt, too, right?

Do you honestly think all women are always flirting with all men all the time? You sound terrifying.
 
https://www.resetera.com/

It’s formatted similarly to GAF, with games and off-topic forums that each have their own hangout subforum. Invitations are rolling out in waves, and former GAF members whose forum identities are verified are taking obvious precedence. Registration to the general public will be coming at a later time.
Click to expand...

It will be interesting to see what effect this has on Neogaf, in the long term.
 
Well it seems like most of the community that made GAF ha sjumped ship, lots of threads open at the minute, whilst GAF continues to burn.
 
OK so two people get absolutely hammered by the sounds of it. Person 1 misreads the situation and makes a kack handed approach on person 2. Person 2 declines person 1 and person 1 backs down.

Why is this entirely the fault of person 1? Person 2 has to share some of the responsibility for getting drunk and sharing a hotel room with person 1 despite being in a relationship. It was obviously going to end badly. Both people act like idiots in this situation but only person 1 is being blamed, despite backing down when it was made clear they misread the situation.

Was person 2 always intending to share that room (e.g. to save money) or did they end up back there, showering, unexpectedly?
 
It isn't obviously going to end badly - why can't you share a room with a friend without assuming sex is going to happen?

Hades said:
Why is this entirely the fault of person 1?
Click to expand...

because it was person 1 who did it - they walked into a bathroom naked, uninvited...
 
dowie said:
It isn't obviously going to end badly - why can't you share a room with a friend without assuming sex is going to happen?



because it was person 1 who did it - they walked into a bathroom naked, uninvited...
Click to expand...
...while drunkenly sharing a hotel room with person 2. They backed down as soon as they were told they misunderstood the situation. Person 2 is not completely blameless. Both are idiots. Not just one of them.
 
Hades said:
...while drunkenly sharing a hotel room with person 2. They backed down as soon as they were told they misunderstood the situation. Person 2 is not completely blameless. Both are idiots. Not just one of them.
Click to expand...

why is person 2 an idiot?

have you never got drunk - why does getting drunk mean you're inviting someone to walk in on you naked in the bathroom?

there is some really dubious logic being displayed in this thread re: victim blaming etc.. I know it is a computer forum but some people act like they've barely socialised with female friends who aren't their partners
 
dowie said:
what is person 2 an idiot?

have you never got drunk - why does getting drunk mean you're inviting someone to walk in on your naked in the bathroom?
Click to expand...
It doesn't and you know that's not what I am saying so please don't try to put words into my mouth. But the scenario is presented as just the fault of person 1. I say again that both are idiots for putting themselves in that situation.

He's a fool for trying it on. She's a fool for thinking that wouldn't happen by getting off her face with a guy and sharing a room with him. Idiots the pair of them.

Yes I have got drunk many times. I've made poor decisions many times. But I stick my hand up and admit I was an idiot when that happens.
 
Hades said:
He's a fool for trying it on. She's a fool for thinking that wouldn't happen by getting off her face with a guy and sharing a room with him. Idiots the pair of them.
Click to expand...

I'm not putting words in your mouth, you're doing this yourself - I don't really understand this ridiculous logic that says she's an idiot for getting drunk with a friend? She's a fool for thinking that someone wouldn't walk in on her naked in the bathroom????

You're basically trotting out the "she was asking for it" line...

honestly do you have no female friends or something?
 
dowie said:
I'm not putting words in your mouth, you're doing this yourself - I don't really understand this ridiculous logic that says she's an idiot for getting drunk with a friend? She's a fool for thinking that someone wouldn't walk in on her naked in the bathroom????

You're basically trotting out the "she was asking for it" line...

honestly do you have no female friends or something?
Click to expand...
OK. Me denying that I'm saying that is somehow me putting words into my own mouth. Bit of an odd approach you have there. Riiiiight......

Again I'm not saying she's asking for it (and again you're trying to put words into my mouth). Humans have a strong mating instinct. That's why there are so may of us on the planet. Alcohol reduces our inhibitions. I'm sure if I ask my many female friends they would agree that drunkenly sharing a room with a male friend opens the risk of this happening.

What if we change the scenario to crossing the road. If I drunkenly walk into the road without looking and without thinking what the outcome could be then I risk getting run over. I didn't ask for that to happen. The car driver is an idiot for not looking But I would also be an idiot for drunkenly walking into the road without looking. Maybe I should try doing that and then asking for sympathy when I get run over.

Or maybe I'm just from a different era where we took responsibility for our own actions.
 
you're not literally saying she's "asking for it" but then you give an argument that amounts to essentially the same thing...

Hades said:
What if we change the scenario to crossing the road. If I drunkenly walk into the road without looking and without thinking what the outcome could be then I risk getting run over. I didn't ask for that to happen. The car driver is an idiot for not looking But I would also be an idiot for drunkenly walking into the road without looking. Maybe I should try doing that and then asking for sympathy when I get run over.

Or maybe I'm just from a different era where we took responsibility for our own actions.
Click to expand...

no you're just making rather dubious arguments

if you drunkenly walk into a road you're inherently putting yourself in danger of being run over by a car that had no intention whatsoever of running you over

if you drunkenly share a room with a friend you're not inherently putting yourself in danger of them getting naked and walking into the bathroom uninvited while you're in the shower as that is a rather rapey thing to do and most people aren't just going to escalate things from a friendly situation to full on getting naked like that
 
Hades said:
I'm sure if I ask my many female friends they would agree that drunkenly sharing a room with a male friend opens the risk of this happening.

What if we change the scenario to crossing the road. If I drunkenly walk into the road without looking and without thinking what the outcome could be then I risk getting run over. I didn't ask for that to happen. The car driver is an idiot for not looking But I would also be an idiot for drunkenly walking into the road without looking. Maybe I should try doing that and then asking for sympathy when I get run over.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry but your female friends must have terrible guy mates. I have gotten hammered and stayed with female friends loads of times, sharing a room and even sharing a bed when double rooms were booked up. I won't lie, in the scenario it crosses your mind but never did i think her willing just because we were drunk and in a room, there has to be much clearer signs. If women genuinely thought that two drunk people couldn't share a room without risk, they wouldn't do it.

His train of thought was probably similar to yours and felt that the scenario was sort of an invitation and so thought his advances would be acceptable but it wasn't because clearly some people (i would say most) don't think like that.

Also the car scenario is a poor comparison. It is a car drivers responsibility to be attentive, it is not anyone's responsibility to announce disinterest prior before receiving any advances.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom