Here's a few tips:
So I met this polish girl from POF and from the beginning she seemed quite a reserved person. Fair enough I thought some people need more time than others to "open" up. We chatted for about 2 hours over some drinks and during this time although she was quite talkative about subjects that I would bring up she didn't ask me a single question, and I mean not a single one, absolutely nothing.
The 1st date was too long. 30-45 minutes (1 hr max) one evening or lunchtime in the week, not on the weekend. If she didn't like you and was just trying to get through the date this wouldn't have gone on for 2 hours. Did you try and have fun with her?
I found that quite a turn off considering this is supposed to be a date of sorts but I didn't say anything. I did get a bit irritated by this but shut my mouth. Upon me putting the question in indirect terms she said she would meet again and we can go to a restaurant next time. Now i didn't believe she meant this and was probably a polite way to get rid off someone but anyway.
Make it clear you're on a date by covering the basics: Greet her with a peck on the cheek, compliment her, hold doors, carry drinks etc. It's not a date of sorts - it's a date!
Don't ask a date if she will see you again. If the first date ends well, simply say bye (hopefully after a nice kiss which you both enjoy) and give it at least 24 hrs, then message her saying you enjoyed the date and want to see her again. Don't ask her, tell her.
Yesterday I sent her a txt asking if we she can meet during the weekend to which she replied that she can't because of a friend she has visiting her. Up until yesterday and prior to my message(s) she hadn't contacted me at all and would always take her time to reply even though she had seen my messages according to whatsapp.
Females on dating sites get MUCH more attention than men, but if she replies it means you're in with a chance. Always leave at least a day before replying and never give a prompt response. Make HER wait and you'll be different from the hoardes of men hounding her.
I didn't believe her reason one bit based on the basis of her general passive attitude towards me and wrote back that she can just tell me that shes not interested, am not her type or whatever and to stop lying to me. She replied she doesn't lie and now after this she is turned off by the fact that I would say such a thing and she said goodbye. (Fine!)
You should have just asked her to give you a shout if she wants to meet up again and you hope she enjoys her friends' visit. Chances are you'd never hear from her again but at least you left things on good terms just in case.
I believe I was rational in my approach to confront this potential BS and even though you can never be 100% sure with someone you don't know and their claims, I think she could not in hell expect me to see her seriously and meet again if thus far she had done absolutely nothing to show any kind of interest. If she had send a txt, replied with "I can't this weekend but lets arrange it for the next", or SOMETHING after our meeting to keep in touch I would have had a different mind however I am not a 6th sense savant to be able to understand what people think inside their mind and I only have their outwards actions to judge them on.
Women aren't very rational, they're very emotional beings. You aren't a savant but you need to start interpreting the cues women give and show them a good time rather than talking at them for 2 hours!
Was I overthinking this and caused a problem that isn't really there or I handled this appropriately and fairly given the circumstances? I just wanted to protect my time/money/feelings messing with someone who has shown, in my opinion, red flags of disinterest.
Concentrate on having fun, it isn't a business deal it's a date!
