What film did you watch last night?

The Day Shall Come (2019) - 3/10

A weird story of FBI honey trap operations which is almost as absurd as it is ridiculous.

The characters are definitely different and there are a few funny moments to be had, but the aspects of the plot don’t really gel together well and the pacing is unbalanced.
 
Midsommar.

The latest attempt at a 21st century incarnation of The Wicker Man. It fails spectacularly, because the last person who knew how to do what Robin Hardy did in 1973 was Robin Hardy, and nobody ever had the decency to ask him. Also, he died in 2016.

Let's start with the good points:

* cinematography; it's visually stunning, and Florence H. Pugh looks gorgeous
* music; it's bold, evocative, and atmospheric

Now the bad points:

* everything else

There is no plot. Some people go to some place, some stuff happens, and then the movie ends. If you're looking for narrative, you won't find it here. Why? Because **** you, that's why.

'Plot' holes, poor characterisation, and general inconsistencies are glossed over like the eighth layer of varnish on your grandmother's piano. Why? Because **** you, that's why.

No attempt is made to develop a coherent belief system for the members of the Swedish cult. Why? Because **** you, that's why.

The cultists' religion is never presented in any systematic way. Its rituals and traditions are entirely arbitrary, and seemingly unrelated to each other. Looks like the scriptwriter said 'Let's just make them do a lot of weird stuff. The weirder the better, so we don't need to explain it.'

Why did they do this? Because the rituals don't need any significance. And why is that? Because they're just a vehicle for the violence, the sole purpose of which is to shock the audience. But the turgid predictability of the screenplay kills any latent tension, so there is no shock at all, and the violence is just boring.

The critical failing of this movie is its lack of a clear protagonist. The original Wicker Man had a powerful plot driven by a strong protagonist, an even stronger antagonist, and the clash between their respective worldviews.

By contrast, Midsommar has... nothing. While its main characters do experience increasing discomfort, their worldview is accommodating to a fault, and yields at the slightest push. As the crazy mounts up on all sides, they continue to rationalise it away in the name of political correctness. This robs Midsommar of an ideological collision; the very motif that worked so well in Hardy's film.

Apparently Swedish cultists use jazz hands instead of clapping, because of course they do. Let's borrow one of the dumbest idea from American social justice warrior culture, and shove it into a movie based in northern Europe. Great stuff.

I rate Midsommar at 13.32 on the Haglee Scale, which works out as a shockingly flawed and highly derivative 4/10 on IMDB (2 points for cinematography, 1 for music, and 1 for Florence H. Pugh).
 
.

Hotel Mumbai 7/10
Pretty harrowing retelling of the 2008 terror attacks. Quite upsetting to know this actually happened, but a very good film.
It was a verying harrowing movie although they did take liberties with the actual events and timeline of events. Also most of the main characters were made up for the film.
 
Joker (2019)

Not quite sure what all the hype was about.The movie was pretty average at best. If it wasn't for Joaquin Phoenix's performance this film would be dog. I though the way he in which he laughted, uncontrollable just cringe and annoying. Its a freakish laugh but after awhile it got boring.

Would I want to see it again?
Most probably not.

Dark, depressing, boring and grim.

5/10.
 
As Above, So Below - 9/10

Been out for a while and this was our third or fourth time of watching. Genuinely creepy "shock" movie for the month of Halloween and unlike some movies of the genre, the found footage technique works quite well in the claustrophobic catacombs under Paris. Much is left to the viewer's own imagination to work out what's going on and the ending open to much discussion and interpretation.
 
As Above, So Below - 9/10

Been out for a while and this was our third or fourth time of watching. Genuinely creepy "shock" movie for the month of Halloween and unlike some movies of the genre, the found footage technique works quite well in the claustrophobic catacombs under Paris. Much is left to the viewer's own imagination to work out what's going on and the ending open to much discussion and interpretation.

Glad to see someone else appreciates this movie. Highly underrated, IMHO!
 
Aniara.

It's the future, and everything's gone to ****! Also, everyone is now Swedish for some reason? :confused:

Anyway, Earth is completely screwed because of things, so we're all ******* off to Mars. The opening scene shows space colonists riding a space lift attached to a space rope, which pulls them up to a space ferry in space.

Thanks to radical advances in space science that are never explained, the trip to Mars will take about three weeks. Even better, the space ferry has more facilities than a luxury cruise liner, so it's going to be a pretty sweet ride.

Just a few days later the space ferry is struck by some space junk, loses all of its space fuel, and veers drastically from its space course. This is a bit of a pain in the space arse, but the captain hails his passengers to reassure them that he can use the mass of the next significant planetary body to slingshot the space ferry back on track.

Unfortunately they'll have to wait about 13 months before they're in range of an appropriate planetary body. That's a bit of a drag, but the passengers are persuaded to exercise patience.

And then... it gets even worse. Horrifically so.

Aniara is an adaptation of the now legendary epic science fiction poem Aniara: en revy om människan i tid och rum by unpopular Swedish poet Harry Martinson.

First published in 1956, Martinson's opus consists of 103 cantos and explores themes such as science, nature, existentialism, terror, despair, and the necessity of art. Needless to say, the film conveys these themes extremely well.

Aniara is a Swedish/Danish collaboration, with additional funding from Suomi Perkele and Deutsche Telefunken. Production values are good, but budget limitations are clearly visible. A few more krona would have made all the difference.

I rate Aniara at 29.97 on the Haglee Scale, which works out as a breathtaking 9/10 on IMDB.
 
Last edited:
The Joker.

Sublime acting - As probably already said before, if you're expecting a DC/Batman movie.. forget it.. This would have equally worked as a standalone "non-comic" book character.

well worthy of 9.5/10
 
For those who dislike Joker I am very curious as to your expectations before you went in and watched it.
 
For those who dislike Joker I am very curious as to your expectations before you went in and watched it.

I had high expectations from the reviews.

Just felt the movie was dull and boring, with a simplistic plot. I go to the cinema to be entertained.
 
Rambo : Last Blood - 7/10 - Really likeable character goes out for revenge in proper brutal ways. Really enjoyed it.

IT : Chapter 2 - 6/10 - Some scenes were too long and everything felt dragged out. Should have been 30 minutes shorter for the theatrical cut.

Midsommar - 7/10 - I quite like these more recent mystery \ horror flicks such as this, The Ritual etc
 
Jack Reacher - 5/10 - Usual ex-military guy comes back in to clean up the mess.
Jack Reacher 2 - 4/10 - And now his daughter comes along for the ride.
 
A movie called "within" that's on netflix. Little horror movie that's actually pretty well done as theres a few twists in it.
 
Back
Top Bottom