Soldato
Npo exaggeration I'm sure?
Honestly its no joke, i get same feeling of wanting to put it off, trying to put the event at the back of my mind, and the same sick to the stomach feeling
Why are YOU single?
- Thread starter Ohnoezfail
- Start date
Honestly its no joke, i get same feeling of wanting to put it off, trying to put the event at the back of my mind, and the same sick to the stomach feeling
Soldato
- Joined
- 21 Jul 2007
- Posts
- 5,488
I haven't complained on here.
Its not a case of wants anyway, more happy compromises.
There is more opportunity now than ever before to subsidise a lack of a relationship with material goods, even if it is pretty hollow.
Soldato
anxiety sucks
Well I do suffer from anxiety/depression, so that may not help
I genuinely feel awful when a mate asks me out, because I don't want to go and spoil it for them by being miserable.
The only thing i do enojy doing is having a mate round for some LAN games, thats about as much socialising as i do
Last edited:
Soldato
Yeah i'd be like that if it was a night club type place, I just can't get on with them. What about a pub?
Soldato
Its a step above a club or bar, but I don't drink, (i have tried, and managed to fall asleep after 2 pints which i hated the taste of
) my mates all drink, and seem to want to drink in excess, so i have to sit watching them make fools of themselves
Man of Honour
Well there's more to socialising than going into town for clubbing (which I haven't done for a while, years probably). I often go out in town for a coffee or to see the sites, shows or exhibitions etc... and often you end up immersed in conversation with some most interesting characters. Not always young nubile women, but it opens avenues, networking is key to meeting people.
I don't buy the whole "woe is me" thing. Not saying that that's what you're saying, just saying it whilst quoting you.
I haven't complained on here.
Its not a case of wants anyway, more happy compromises.
There is more opportunity now than ever before to subsidise a lack of a relationship with material goods, even if it is pretty hollow.
As I said, I didn't mean it aimed at you, but at the general populace.
I agree now days it's a lot easier to get by without being in a relationship, Casual dating/flings are on the rise and also a very easy way of getting some connection without commitment. However, people who complain about not being in a relationship and looking for something to blame irritates me a little.
Soldato
- Joined
- 21 Jul 2007
- Posts
- 5,488
Well there's more to socialising than going into town for clubbing (which I haven't done for a while, years probably). I often go out in town for a coffee or to see the sites, shows or exhibitions etc... and often you end up immersed in conversation with some most interesting characters. Not always young nubile women, but it opens avenues, networking is key to meeting people.
I don't buy the whole "woe is me" thing. Not saying that that's what you're saying, just saying it whilst quoting you.
As I said, I didn't mean it aimed at you, but at the general populace.
I agree now days it's a lot easier to get by without being in a relationship, Casual dating/flings are on the rise and also a very easy way of getting some connection without commitment. However, people who complain about not being in a relationship and looking for something to blame irritates me a little.
Oh no, I believe its easy for anyone to get a relationship, theres no exactly a shortage of people in the world. If you want a girlfriend/boyfriend, its hardly difficult to achieve.
However, and I don't think I'm alone, I want a girlfriend who is way out of my league, appearance-wise. Its either perfection or nothing for me, which is a) hypocritical and b) completely stupid. But whatever, just have to deal with it.
Insecurities are hard to overcome simply because they are just that, insecurities. I'm shy around girls, don't like how I look, etc. etc. but cba to do anything about it and have always used excuses to justify it.
Man of Honour
As I said I have lots of insecurities and self esteem issues, it hasn't stop me from getting involved with some very beautiful women - which you'd think would take me away from those! We all want the best, but you know what they say you can't help who you fall in love with.... Some people are happier with flings, and they are typically the ones that you think "how the hell did he get her..." and then there are the monogamous I need to be married ASAP ones, and then there are the average Joe who meet someone who is their perfect match.
I agree you shouldn't accept 2nd best, but at the same time you need to let yourself be happy.
As humans we are fickle creatures, and you could have the most attractive and wonderful woman in your heart but still go "wow" to another. It's just the way we tick.
I agree you shouldn't accept 2nd best, but at the same time you need to let yourself be happy.
As humans we are fickle creatures, and you could have the most attractive and wonderful woman in your heart but still go "wow" to another. It's just the way we tick.
Soldato
I often go out in town for a coffee or to see the sites, shows or exhibitions etc... and often you end up immersed in conversation with some most interesting characters. Not always young nubile women, but it opens avenues, networking is key to meeting people.
I don't buy the whole "woe is me" thing. Not saying that that's what you're saying, just saying it whilst quoting you.
Do you do that by yourself? If so you have more self confidence than me by a long way.
I'm not moaning that I'm single. I know why I am single as i've mentioned earlier in this thread. Yes you may call them excuses, but I call them reasons.
I've tried going out with mates, even just down the pub, but I've never enjoyed it. I'm always wishing I was back home. I also hate going into the city during the day due to the crowds which fuel my anxiety, maybe I have a phobia of crowds?
I'm waiting to see a counselor regarding my anxiety/depression, but I've seen many a psychologist and psychiatrist throughout my life, but none have helped, so i don't hold much hope for this new one.
I've sort of settled for the fact I'll probably never meet anyone, It gets me down a lot of the time, but I get over it. I have fallen in the rut of buying material things as quick fixes of happiness though. I've been single for 7 years now and I dont think things will have changed in another 7.
Soldato
it is a step to go over but it does help. I met plenty of new people this year simply by going out to as many car shows* as possible (on my own because mates have deserted me), and while i aint exactly best mates with these new people, you are more likely to meet someone that likes what you like if you meet them at places like that. In a Nightclub/pubs you generally have absolutely no idea what someone really likes.
* Replace car shows with anything you like doing.
Associate
Also, I'm a real snob when it comes to intellect.
I recently joined a dating site and get so many messages from guys who just can't spell the simplest of words, for example 'reely' instead of really, 'ar' instead of are.
If I see spelling like that in a message, or text speak, it gets deleted, no matter how great the guy sounds. I know its stupid, but alas, I can't change my view.
Yet another reason why tisonlyme is a single lady
I recently joined a dating site and get so many messages from guys who just can't spell the simplest of words, for example 'reely' instead of really, 'ar' instead of are.
If I see spelling like that in a message, or text speak, it gets deleted, no matter how great the guy sounds. I know its stupid, but alas, I can't change my view.
Yet another reason why tisonlyme is a single lady
Associate
Also, I'm a real snob when it comes to intellect.
I recently joined a dating site and get so many messages from guys who just can't spell the simplest of words, for example 'reely' instead of really, 'ar' instead of are.
If I see spelling like that in a message, or text speak, it gets deleted, no matter how great the guy sounds. I know its stupid, but alas, I can't change my view.
Yet another reason why tisonlyme is a single lady
why join a dating agency??? there are plenty of guys on here, maybe we could all post pictures of ourselves
haha
Soldato
That picture has just had me in stitches for about 5 minutes!
First thing that popped into my head after reading the first 2 pages xD
For me the fear of rejection far outweighs the chance of anything positive coming out of making the first move
Sums it up for me, im a pussy tbh xD
Also, I'm a real snob when it comes to intellect.
I recently joined a dating site and get so many messages from guys who just can't spell the simplest of words, for example 'reely' instead of really, 'ar' instead of are.
If I see spelling like that in a message, or text speak, it gets deleted, no matter how great the guy sounds. I know its stupid, but alas, I can't change my view.
Yet another reason why tisonlyme is a single lady
That's one area I try really hard on. (pun not intended)
Where are you based anyway? I'm on a few of those types of site too.
I suffer from social anxiety and physical sickness.
Wich means when im out and i feel like something is going to happen to me,i get nervous and really sick,literally heaving from the thought i might have to actually move or talk..
i mean WTF ??
If im on my own when out at a pub/club im fine,but with a mate anxiety kicks in.
Wich means when im out and i feel like something is going to happen to me,i get nervous and really sick,literally heaving from the thought i might have to actually move or talk..
i mean WTF ??
If im on my own when out at a pub/club im fine,but with a mate anxiety kicks in.
Im a **** tbh
If i see a female at a party,i chat to her and leave with her
do this on a weekly basis and you dont need a relationship
slight change
slight change
Ye when im on my own i can pull
If i have a friend with me,thats when anxiety kicks in