I find the nights the worst. Which was the time I usually wasnt alone.
woke up this morning wanting to die
- Thread starter Ilikeitblackplease
- Start date
I find the nights the worst. Which was the time I usually wasnt alone.
Dude with all due respect your worrying about nothing at all. One piece of broken asbestos (which was probably chrysotile ie white asbestos so not terrible anyway) is very unlikely to do you any damage.
Chin up and get a worthwhile hobby, get outside and honestly I've found excercise to be the single best thing that alleviates my anxiety
This exercise is key ...
Soldato
Before you go to sleep, write yourself a note and leave it on the bedside table.
Write down the things you are going to do, what fun or new things you are going to try, reasons to get up and be happy.
Wake up in the morning feeling sad, read note and it'll make you realise that it does pass
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brown and white, an i got some one my hands but didnt know at the time.
well ok the brown is not good but after just one 'exposure' the chances are utterly miniscule. Asbestos is bad, generally, but it is a much overhyped and overmarketed thing. I end up around it all the time (Industrial Electrician) and while I respect it and do what I can to protect myself I'd say my exposure (like many others) is probably quite frightening if sat down and thought about. The point is you've had a really minor exposure and theres naff all you can do about it now. Worrying about something that you have zero control over is futile especially when its statisitically extreemly unlikely you will have any adverse effects in the future. If you do its likely 20 years away so do yourself a favour and dont spend the next xx amount of years worrying about something that may or may not happen that you have no chance of influencing anyway.
I'm sorry if this sounds harsh I just get a little peeved at all the hype around asbestosis, more specifically the misinformation that surrounds it.
Get outside, do something worthwhile. If you are at a point where you don't feel like doing anything for yourself then go do something for someone else... go mow your neighbours lawn or something... Random acts of kindness etc.
I'll say it again, excercise. and not your fingers on the keyboard. I spent nearly 2 years housebound with chronic anxiety and it was horrific. It wasn't until a friend dragged me out to do a bit of charity work for some old folk (and yes it involved mowing some lawns) that I even began to get better. However the effort that it took was more than worth it, the old addage of you only get out what you put in is quite correct and very relevant. Sitting there writing on ocuk forums wont do you a whole lot of good
I'm sorry if this sounds harsh I just get a little peeved at all the hype around asbestosis, more specifically the misinformation that surrounds it.
Get outside, do something worthwhile. If you are at a point where you don't feel like doing anything for yourself then go do something for someone else... go mow your neighbours lawn or something... Random acts of kindness etc.
I'll say it again, excercise. and not your fingers on the keyboard. I spent nearly 2 years housebound with chronic anxiety and it was horrific. It wasn't until a friend dragged me out to do a bit of charity work for some old folk (and yes it involved mowing some lawns) that I even began to get better. However the effort that it took was more than worth it, the old addage of you only get out what you put in is quite correct and very relevant. Sitting there writing on ocuk forums wont do you a whole lot of good
Soldato
I wouldn't let asbestos exposure be the sole thing to get me down. I was probably exposed to it a few years ago when I had the early 80's artex removed in a couple of rooms, dust was everywhere.
They were just phasing asbestos artex out in the early 80's so there was 50/50 chance.
They were just phasing asbestos artex out in the early 80's so there was 50/50 chance.
Could we drop the asbestos thing please, what triggers these things isn't always going to be rational so pointing this out doesn't really help.
OP's probably been on the edge for a while and this is just the random thing that triggered it. Straw/Camel's back etc.
Meh, maybe only people who understand depression should comment,
nobody wants to feel stupid for reacting irrationally when this isn't really something they have control over
Soldato
This was me last year happy.
I'm not gay or owt, but for 40 you look a fair bit younger!
You have hair for starters
Along the line of just mix stuff up (and I do know it's easy for us to say that "well just blarr blarr blarrr...")
I've just had a tattoo done and the guy spends most of his time in Thailand, he went for a hol about 10 years ago, loved it and moved a few years later.
He's in a remote fishing village where it's sooooooo cheap to live there and the pace of life is leisurely and pretty much stress free, everyone talks to each other TBH it sound ace!
Just remember being happy isn't about having pots of cash.
And he said for some reason interracial relationships tend to work out there
From what he said 6-800 gets you a return flight, and that same amount of money would last you a fair few months out there!
Maybe £1.5-2k could see you in a completely different life style for getting towards a year (not sure how long travel visa's last)
could be a good change of perspective?
Good luck anyway
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What was your sleeping pattern over the past week?
Do you wake up still tired?
So much biological activity takes place overnight and it is really easy to slip into negative sleep patterns of one kind or another. Just be aware of this.
Do you wake up still tired?
So much biological activity takes place overnight and it is really easy to slip into negative sleep patterns of one kind or another. Just be aware of this.
I would highly highly suggest go see a GP and speak your mind. Let it all out and don't hold back. Tell them you are suicidal at times and they will give you medication and counselling. I have no idea why some people frown upon this idea. You would take medication for a broken leg, why not take it for a broken mind?
I know EXACTLY how you feel OP. I really do because i have been through it very recently although the onset of depression was my own stupid fault when i got addicted to tramadol tablets from the black market. I took them to stop my body aching from lack of exercise. Sitting around most the day not doing much and my legs would ache. Hot bath would get rid of it for a short while, but i craved the mild euphoria of tramadol. They would make me feel all nice and fuzzy, uplifted and content.
Of course, i didn't want to sustain such a habit because of availability and the constipation they gave me. It was horrible knowing i have non left for the day, my mind would go into anxiety overload .That's no way to live so i stopped. Bring on the severe anxiety & depression. Feeling tired after 12 hours sleep, cat napping throughout the day, but then insomnia at night time. On top of this i had restless leg syndrome and they ached. Add to the fact i felt lower than low. I would sit there and watch crap TV because it was an effort to fetch the remote. I was thirsty but making a cuppa would fill me with dread. Completely lost interest in absolutely everything, thoughts of suicide (is this what life is and will always be). Waking in the morning with exactly what you have and just wanting the day to be over so i can go back to bed. After an hour or so it would fade and leaving the bed wouldnt seem such a gruelling task.
Picture the scene from the film trainspotting where he gives up the gear and is sitting in the pub with his family just staring into nothing. All life in his eyes is lost and all that remains is a dark empty soul. Yes, that was me. Horrible horrible horrible It went on for weeks and weeks and i HAD to do something so i went to the GP. They put me on citalopram.
After what seemed like 6 months but was infact 3 weeks, i could see a difference. My old self is coming back again. The old teetotal person i once was and i'm liking it. My hobbies and interests have come back. Ive got my life back thank goodness and i no longer go through life looking at other people and wondering how the hell they manage to go through life. The point is, they probably weren't going through what i was. They would play in the garden with their children, laugh at comedy TV, talk banter to other people and go on days out in the glorious sunshine. Just the sheer thought of summer made me anxious and depressed because i would have an overbearing forever lasting guilt because i'm not doing what everybody else is doing and having fun. It's crippling me to live like this and i REFUSE to let it carry on. At least i have that little 1% fight in me to think like that and go get help.
Depression and anxiety can rob your life. If you don't get help then this doom you're experiencing can carry on forever. Just think of that what i just said for the whole day. Take the medication and see where you go. You may have to swap and change medication, and at times it may exacerbate your feelings and thought processes for better or worse, but it's got to be worth it to end this misery hasn't it? They aren't the full problem solver mystery drug, but they sure can help you see a way, lift your mood and give you reminiscence of how you felt before the drop to the bottom of the pit.
I'm not sorry for the long post. Hope some of it sinks in and you pass this crossroads in your life sooner rather than later.
The current place you are in your life is NEVER the final destination.
Try to remember that quote.
I know EXACTLY how you feel OP. I really do because i have been through it very recently although the onset of depression was my own stupid fault when i got addicted to tramadol tablets from the black market. I took them to stop my body aching from lack of exercise. Sitting around most the day not doing much and my legs would ache. Hot bath would get rid of it for a short while, but i craved the mild euphoria of tramadol. They would make me feel all nice and fuzzy, uplifted and content.
Of course, i didn't want to sustain such a habit because of availability and the constipation they gave me. It was horrible knowing i have non left for the day, my mind would go into anxiety overload .That's no way to live so i stopped. Bring on the severe anxiety & depression. Feeling tired after 12 hours sleep, cat napping throughout the day, but then insomnia at night time. On top of this i had restless leg syndrome and they ached. Add to the fact i felt lower than low. I would sit there and watch crap TV because it was an effort to fetch the remote. I was thirsty but making a cuppa would fill me with dread. Completely lost interest in absolutely everything, thoughts of suicide (is this what life is and will always be). Waking in the morning with exactly what you have and just wanting the day to be over so i can go back to bed. After an hour or so it would fade and leaving the bed wouldnt seem such a gruelling task.
Picture the scene from the film trainspotting where he gives up the gear and is sitting in the pub with his family just staring into nothing. All life in his eyes is lost and all that remains is a dark empty soul. Yes, that was me. Horrible horrible horrible It went on for weeks and weeks and i HAD to do something so i went to the GP. They put me on citalopram.
After what seemed like 6 months but was infact 3 weeks, i could see a difference. My old self is coming back again. The old teetotal person i once was and i'm liking it. My hobbies and interests have come back. Ive got my life back thank goodness and i no longer go through life looking at other people and wondering how the hell they manage to go through life. The point is, they probably weren't going through what i was. They would play in the garden with their children, laugh at comedy TV, talk banter to other people and go on days out in the glorious sunshine. Just the sheer thought of summer made me anxious and depressed because i would have an overbearing forever lasting guilt because i'm not doing what everybody else is doing and having fun. It's crippling me to live like this and i REFUSE to let it carry on. At least i have that little 1% fight in me to think like that and go get help.
Depression and anxiety can rob your life. If you don't get help then this doom you're experiencing can carry on forever. Just think of that what i just said for the whole day. Take the medication and see where you go. You may have to swap and change medication, and at times it may exacerbate your feelings and thought processes for better or worse, but it's got to be worth it to end this misery hasn't it? They aren't the full problem solver mystery drug, but they sure can help you see a way, lift your mood and give you reminiscence of how you felt before the drop to the bottom of the pit.
I'm not sorry for the long post.
Hope some of it sinks in and you pass this crossroads in your life sooner rather than later. The current place you are in your life is NEVER the final destination.
Try to remember that quote.
You only get one go mate don't blow it! 
Man up have a drink and Fapp! No really life is a very very precious thing.
Worst things in life that can happen, imagine not to being able to masturbate.
So man up you be ok, trust me the is always light at the end of the that shady tunnel!
Man up have a drink and Fapp! No really life is a very very precious thing.
Worst things in life that can happen, imagine not to being able to masturbate.
So man up you be ok, trust me the is always light at the end of the that shady tunnel!
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I think the only solution is to try to distract your mind. I try to learn new things.
Lately I've been downloading videos from Richard Dawkins, Lawrence Krauss, Brian Greene, Neil deGrasse Tyson. evolution, quantum mechanics.
Probably doesn't help with the pointless life thing Actually the vastness of the universe, realizing how small we are probably put my mind in this state
Lately I've been downloading videos from Richard Dawkins, Lawrence Krauss, Brian Greene, Neil deGrasse Tyson. evolution, quantum mechanics.
Probably doesn't help with the pointless life thing
Actually the vastness of the universe, realizing how small we are probably put my mind in this state Deleted member 138126
D
Deleted member 138126
Mate, what a magnificent looking dog.
Also forgot to add that cortisol peaks in the morning and falls throughout the day. Having high cortisol in the morning can make you feel edgy, anxious and nervous for an utterly unexplainable reason. I get it most mornings. Go get a bloodtest and ask for a thyroid check along with liver function test and vitamin D3 levels checkup. Do you get much sunlight and/or feel lethargic during the day?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cortisol_awakening_response
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cortisol_awakening_response
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Soldato
Hell if it that bad son! Lets fapp together on Skype, you will see my old man with a massive beard and a tongue sticking out"
Skype me !
Life is a piece of urine mate duckem as I say ! I am what I am so duck you!
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went to see someone last week , received a copy of a letter she sent to my gp and there something I dont like about it.
"he denied alcohol or drug use" now to me this implies "refuses to admit" need to go back and make sure the wording is corrected. As I dont drink or use drugs, dont need this on my record.
"he denied alcohol or drug use" now to me this implies "refuses to admit" need to go back and make sure the wording is corrected. As I dont drink or use drugs, dont need this on my record.
Sounds correct to me.
You denied doing drugs and alcohol. And that's what's on the record.