The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

feel pretty dirty... Was with this girl for 8-9 months, a bit like what Cobra described; love, holidays away, talking about getting a flat etc.

We broke up in July (it was kind of mutual, I guess). I lost a lot of weight initially but had since been getting better, all I had to do was remember what she put me through.

I replied to her a few days ago, now we're meeting up at the end of the month "no strings attached". Just felt the urge to vent to a bunch of internet strangers because I sure as hell can't tell my friends or family, they got dragged into the ****storm last time....
 
Meeting up can only be a bad thing. It will bring back all kinds of emotion. You will have your own ideas about what you want from the meet up, she will probably have her own ideas about what she wants from it...and they probably don't match yours.

Theophany said:
A fit girl who watches F1? I'd say get your claws into that one. :D
Click to expand...

I already have :p

It does all seem to be happening a little soon, but at the same time it feels right?
 
So looks like after just over a year I rejoin the ranks of the single folks.

she says "i'm sorry but i just don't love you the same way i did before" :(

ah well was a friendly split, got all my stuff, and we parted amicably after talking things through over the next day and deciding that it was definitely best to call it a day and part friends than try and drag it on and end up resenting each other.

We don't live near each other so seeing her around isn't going to be an issue, not going for the "OMG sever!!!!" option as she's still fun to talk to and good for advice, but definitely not going for the groveling "please take me back" either. surprisingly grown up and sensible for once in my life. I do have her to thank for that, I'm much less of an emotionally crippled manchild now :p

Guess this means i can start hammering the gym at weekends too now :D
 
Cobra-UK said:
Well, meeting up with a girl I met Saturday night. We had a few drunken smooches, danced a lot and had a great laugh. I'm driving so I can't get a dose of dutch courage.

Problem with me though is I never know how to play it. Do you go in for the the kiss and hug or play it cool ? The talking and meeting bits I'm fine with, just the other things.

Wish me luck.
Click to expand...

Well then.

It went pretty well I would say. We had a few drinks and a laugh, just not sure if she is right for me. She is lovely (my beer goggles were on good form when we "met") and we have quite a bit in common.

Two things that I have an 'issue' with.

1. She's 22 (I'm 30) Not that it's technically a problem, just some mental thing in my head that's telling me she's a bit too young. I have a son too and just not convinced that younger people are up for the potential challenges that lie ahead. (basically i think that people nearer my age are ready to settle bit more ).

2. The "travelling" thing. I'm not going to go travelling, I have no need too and i dont want to. She only mentioned that she was thinking about doing it but isn't sure now as her friends all have boyfriends.

Basically Im a bit scared of the same stuff happening that has already happened with my last two. As in, having a change of heart a few years down the line. I know you can't predict the future and shouldn't worry to much about it but I really don't want to go through it again and again. Maybe I need to start treating them like ****, seems like the guys that do, get away with it. A girl I met a while ago said that I was " a bit too nice", I mean wtf is that all about ??? You women are strange creatures sometimes :o .
 
Well, the new relationship is going really well, although I still kind of miss the ex occasionally, which just fills me with guilt!

Took an additional step today to unfriend the ex on FB, seemed like the appropriate thing to do tbh and hopefully it will help me transition into the new relationship better.

One thing is for sure, I wouldn't date younger again. This relationship is much better than the last one, helped by her being the same age and in the same profession.
 
CaptainRAVE said:
Well, the new relationship is going really well, although I still kind of miss the ex occasionally, which just fills me with guilt!
Click to expand...

Sometimes your brain isn't your best friend and it likes to think about comfort zones (which in itself is ironic). Don't sweat it, it's a natural part of not being with someone.

Took an additional step today to unfriend the ex on FB, seemed like the appropriate thing to do tbh and hopefully it will help me transition into the new relationship better.
Click to expand...

Sever, unfriend, do whatever you need to do. Remove yourself.

One thing is for sure, I wouldn't date younger again. This relationship is much better than the last one, helped by her being the same age and in the same profession.
Click to expand...

That's good news. Isn't it funny how life somehow works out? :)
 
Broke up with the ex about 6 months ago as she wanted to move to Australia and it doesn't interest me so I stayed behind. She wanted to do long distance, but I didn't and I actually enjoy the stress free single life these days! It was an amicable break up and we still talk (which was strange at first as I'm used to hating my ex's and never speaking to them again!). She comes home every couple of months and always wants to meet up for "good times" then heads away again (she's still single too). She wants to meet up again at Xmas for a servicing. I feel a bit like a dirty man whore, but I suppose I get the best of both worlds!
 
James_N said:
28 years for me :p
Click to expand...

I don't envy you matey, 28 years is really bad.

on a side note

some little Chinese girl has taken a liking to my photography (yeah i couldn't believe it either) and fingers crossed, We should be arranging a day out in London sometime in January, Half date, half just randomly going around shooting things hehe :D
 
Split with the polish girl i was seeing as things just didn't feel right, ended about 2 weeks ago.

Single again for christmas!
 
OOh that sucks. :(
Something's wrong with mine at the mo as well. Maybe it's the weather or the alignment with Jupiter (in other words **** only knows what)
I've tried to write a post about it this morning but gave up. :(
She's virtually forgotten about me for the last three days. :( and the days leading up to that I've had to virtually restrain her to get a cuddle. But of course "nothing is wrong" when I ask. Driving me up the wall this weekend.
Three nights in a row "I'll text you when I get back" so I wait up til like one in the morning but the text never comes..
Next day at about lunch time I get a "U alright..." like she's trying to shift the blame to me or something.
So we've not seen each other since Wednesday and Saturday day time we text a bit and organise to meet at hers. Again, "I'll text you when I've finished work"
cue 10.30pm and I text her a bit of her type of text "Are you alright????"
Oh sorry.. **** day blah, finished late blah, fell asleep blah.... but she's in the car on her way to her mates house.
I lost my rag at that point :(
 
Last edited:
Clov!s said:
Split with the polish girl i was seeing as things just didn't feel right, ended about 2 weeks ago.

Single again for christmas!
Click to expand...

Think of the money you'll save! :D

I've been missing cuddles lately, sometimes I miss sex, but I miss cuddles just as much. Annoying!

New years resolution will be to get back out there I think, am getting on a bit now! :eek:
 
knip said:
Think of the money you'll save! :D

I've been missing cuddles lately, sometimes I miss sex, but I miss cuddles just as much. Annoying!

New years resolution will be to get back out there I think, am getting on a bit now! :eek:
Click to expand...

I earn enough to not worry about spending it :D

I suppose i can go the gym every day now :)

ye i miss sex already! no christmas day fun :(

Dont be silly! never too old :) how old are you btw?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom