I find it pretty insane you didn't move out there permanently when your child was born, I'd take that as a massive insult. "You still want to be with me, and we have a child together but you're going to live in another country", why?
Another year, another issue with the ex; who I'm starting to suspect is quite mad. I've written about her before, but just as a summary -
We were together for almost a decade. For the vast majority of the relationship I paid all the bills; food, holidays, clothes etc. Then, in the last 18 months I lost my job. I decided to go to university with the aim of building a career and solid financial platform from which her and I could enjoy a good quality of life. We discussed the implications. She would have to pay the bills. She did without complaint. Then, one month into my course, totally out of the blue, she cheated on me and left. Following then, she has been sending me messages via different platforms, asking me to send her money. Now she knows I'm a poor student. She also knows that the verbal agreement we had was that I'd pay her back when I graduate. But no, the messages continue...
Roll on to last week. I'm elbow deep in a very challenging medical audit report. Stressed out like a mad man and with only the desire to get a good grade on my mind. Then, I get a message from the ex....She says she hopes I had a good Xmas (I didn't), and then proceeds to ask me for money. The woman is driving me nuts. I've been debating whether or not to reply to her. Should I? It's almost like she's wanting me to fund her new life with the guy she was cheating on me with, all while I work my fingers to the bone at uni. Damn, I gave her so much when we we're together, I feel so angry.
Here you go:Another year, another issue with the ex; who I'm starting to suspect is quite mad. I've written about her before, but just as a summary -
We were together for almost a decade. For the vast majority of the relationship I paid all the bills; food, holidays, clothes etc. Then, in the last 18 months I lost my job. I decided to go to university with the aim of building a career and solid financial platform from which her and I could enjoy a good quality of life. We discussed the implications. She would have to pay the bills. She did without complaint. Then, one month into my course, totally out of the blue, she cheated on me and left. Following then, she has been sending me messages via different platforms, asking me to send her money. Now she knows I'm a poor student. She also knows that the verbal agreement we had was that I'd pay her back when I graduate. But no, the messages continue...
Roll on to last week. I'm elbow deep in a very challenging medical audit report. Stressed out like a mad man and with only the desire to get a good grade on my mind. Then, I get a message from the ex....She says she hopes I had a good Xmas (I didn't), and then proceeds to ask me for money. The woman is driving me nuts. I've been debating whether or not to reply to her. Should I? It's almost like she's wanting me to fund her new life with the guy she was cheating on me with, all while I work my fingers to the bone at uni. Damn, I gave her so much when we we're together, I feel so angry.
Hi <X>,
We were together for <insert number> of years. For the vast majority of that time I paid all the bills. I did this out of love and not expecting anything in return. During the period where I lost my job we agreed that you would pay the bills, and then when I graduated and got a job, I would contribute again and pay you back for some of it. We also implicitly agreed to stay faithful to one another. You broke that agreement by cheating on me. As such I don't particularly feel like keeping that agreement, and whatever good feeling I had towards you went out the window when you decided you wanted to hop on someone elses <insert word here>.
Finally, please stop talking to me. I owe you nothing.
Goodbye.
She's blocked on all platforms I use. But there's no method I'm aware of that prevents her from sending me messages via new accounts. Which is what is now happening.
Also do this.That's why you report to police as harassment, and they have a word with her as an official warning.
That's why you report to police as harassment, and they have a word with her as an official warning. Or you just keep blocking, blocking, blocking. She turns up at work, call security. She turns up at your home, throw her out and call the police.
She keeps coming back to you because you keep letting her. Presumably you've been giving her money too, so why would she ever stop taking the free cash you give out so she can spend it on her new boyfriend? Get angry, get it over and done with!
I haven't given her a penny since she left in 2017. Filing a complaint seems like the next logical step.
report her to the police
For what? Just ignore and block.