Am i in the wrong with the girlfirend

Simple - you're both too young to be relying on each other financially unless you're actually married. FFS if she wants to go on fancy holidays she should be saving the dosh too. If she's relying on you to finance her hols tell her to get to *$@#
 
Sounds like me and the GF when we first met except it was cars and not holidays.

I bought her first car with the intention of her paying me back. I didn't recieve a penny and then 3 years later I had to buy her second car :p

Been together for 7 years now and she gets pocket money every week now. Seems cruel but it's the only way to make her save money.
 
I phone her up this morning and say whats happening why didnt you text me back. She says she is sooooooooo angry that i wont lend her the money and that i dont trust her etc.
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That is unbelievable...

Tell her to shove it, and her mother.

If you lend her the money now, expect this for the duration of your relationship.

The behaviour of your GF (ex) is like my sons, if you give in to something he wants then he will push for more, so i don't, he screams and cries but still comes over and gives me a hug and a "sorry daddy" when he's thought about it.

He's only 3 BTW.

Tell her to grow up - in the meantime, go on holiday with the lads and enjoy yourself with some unhibited ladies ;)

I can recommend Faliraki for that type of holiday ;)
 
Usel said:
Sounds like me and the GF when we first met except it was cars and not holidays.

I bought her first car with the intention of her paying me back. I didn't recieve a penny and then 3 years later I had to buy her second car :p

Been together for 7 years now and she gets pocket money every week now. Seems cruel but it's the only way to make her save money.
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Fool!

See, the cycle is there - Buys 1st car, then 2nd - not one penny back off of her!

Enjoy your OWN money - you earned it! Dont let her squander and enjoy it.
 
Both the wife and I have read this thread and both think that you are doing the right thing. If she can't even save a single penny over 7 months for a holiday then she will not be able to contribute towards rent,mortgage, bills etc etc. Thank your lucky stars she's not pregnant chances are she will end up like her mother. Forget her move on time to put some more notches on the bed;) have yourself a laugh and have loads of short term relationships.
 
mightynimrod said:
Fool!
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Or am I?

We both work 40-50 hours a week.

I come home from work and watch telly or play on the 360.

She comes home from work and cooks my dinner, cleans the house, washes my clothes..........

She now doesn't cost me a penny and I have a servant :D
 
I agree with the OP, i think you shouldnt have to lend her money especially if she hasnt even attempted to save any money. If she had been saving some every week then i might not agree with you! I earn a lil less than 100 a week, and i manage to save 40 to 50 pounds a week! It is easy to save money, if you cut back on a few things:)

Hope you have a good hols with the lads, you shouldnt have to loose out because of how she has acted:)
 
Amleto said:
break-up with her if she's really having a barny. tell her to give you a ring when she grows up tbh.
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I second that.. unless she is amazing to be with or some other thing is exceptional with her.. say goodbye.
 
Immulsifier said:
Has she realised her mistake yet dean_ham?
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UPDATE : texted her a bit ago and said

"whats going on then, i dont want this to go on anymore. lets decide whats best thing to do and do it"

her reply was "F OFF"

i know im silly for texting her but i wanted to see what she had to say, obviously shes still mad. Basically texted her and said we are finnished then. Get my stuff together and i will be down there tomorrow to get it.

Gonna have to see her brother and sister before i go, they are excellent little kids and will miss them and also her grand parents ill pop up and see them before i go. They the only decent people in the family... :(

Any nice girls out there then on ocuk ;) hehe ;) this thread will turn into a bit of a dating thread now ha ha

Anyway cheers guys thank you for all the comments!
 
make sure that you don't let her change your mind when you go down to collect your stuff.

Sounds like you have had a lucky escape :)
 
I earn about 18k a year at the moment, and last year me and the GF went on a last minute holiday. She is a student with no part time job. She point blank refused to let me pay more than half for anything. EVERYTHING went right down the middle, spending money, flights, hotels, everything (obv we bought our own pressies for family) but she is always like this, cinema, going out for meals etc.

To me, for her to say 'OMG LETS GO ON HOLIDAY !!! BUT YOU CAN PAY !!! LOLZ!!!' is rather cheeky.
 
I've been reading this thread because I'm bored and I must say I think your all very harsh. If you loved her the money wouldn't matter, fine make her pay it back but there's no need to throw a strom about it. So you spend £700 pounds and don't get it back. Big deal, it's the memories that count, you only live once. Have you ever thought how bad it must be to work all week for £100 and not even be able to think 'it's not so bad, I'm going on holiday soon'? So, she wants to go somewhere expensive and 'live beyond her means', she's 18, there's no way your gonna be able to afford to go expensive places when you're living together with bills to pay etc like you're wanting. Maybe she isn't as keen on living together etc as you think, what happens to her single mum when she moves out? So she hasn't saved anything, she will be doing after she's been in order to pay you back, she learns the value of money = problem solved. Do you not think she might feel bad enough even asking to borrow money? A holiday with your girlfriend somewhere nice would be worth twice that as a drink, sleep, eat, repeat holiday to Spain 'with the boys'.

I'm not trying to say your wrong but I think you must have your doubts about what you've done or you wouldn't have posted on here, I think the replies you've got are very cruel and selfish. If you can't treat someone you love to what could be the holiday of a lifetime, I don't know what kind of world we live. An afterthought, she won't want to live with you unless you she knows what you're like to live with and the only way she's gonna find out is by going on holiday, and she aint gonna want to live with someone who won't let her have the heating on when she's cold because she hasn't saved any money to pay the bills.
 
Immulsifier said:
Im afraid thats about the mentality id expect from an 18 year old.
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Yeah i suppose, i dunno tough when i was 18 ( 2 years ago ) dont think i was like that. Yea most prob ive had a lucky escape. Im just glad i know where i am, what she thought of me and now i can move on.
 
mark.souness said:
I've been reading this thread because I'm bored and I must say I think your all very harsh. If you loved her the money wouldn't matter, fine make her pay it back but there's no need to throw a strom about it. So you spend £700 pounds and don't get it back. Big deal, it's the memories that count, you only live once. Have you ever thought how bad it must be to work all week for £100 and not even be able to think 'it's not so bad, I'm going on holiday soon'? So, she wants to go somewhere expensive and 'live beyond her means', she's 18, there's no way your gonna be able to afford to go expensive places when you're living together with bills to pay etc like you're wanting. Maybe she isn't as keen on living together etc as you think, what happens to her single mum when she moves out? So she hasn't saved anything, she will be doing after she's been in order to pay you back, she learns the value of money = problem solved. Do you not think she might feel bad enough even asking to borrow money? A holiday with your girlfriend somewhere nice would be worth twice that as a drink, sleep, eat, repeat holiday to Spain 'with the boys'.

I'm not trying to say your wrong but I think you must have your doubts about what you've done or you wouldn't have posted on here, I think the replies you've got are very cruel and selfish. If you can't treat someone you love to what could be the holiday of a lifetime, I don't know what kind of world we live. An afterthought, she won't want to live with you unless you she knows what you're like to live with and the only way she's gonna find out is by going on holiday, and she aint gonna want to live with someone who won't let her have the heating on when she's cold because she hasn't saved any money to pay the bills.
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I think its more to do that he was being used.
 
mark.souness said:
I've been reading this thread because I'm bored and I must say I think your all very harsh. If you loved her the money wouldn't matter, fine make her pay it back but there's no need to throw a strom about it. So you spend £700 pounds and don't get it back. Big deal, it's the memories that count, you only live once. Have you ever thought how bad it must be to work all week for £100 and not even be able to think 'it's not so bad, I'm going on holiday soon'? So, she wants to go somewhere expensive and 'live beyond her means', she's 18, there's no way your gonna be able to afford to go expensive places when you're living together with bills to pay etc like you're wanting. Maybe she isn't as keen on living together etc as you think, what happens to her single mum when she moves out? So she hasn't saved anything, she will be doing after she's been in order to pay you back, she learns the value of money = problem solved. Do you not think she might feel bad enough even asking to borrow money? A holiday with your girlfriend somewhere nice would be worth twice that as a drink, sleep, eat, repeat holiday to Spain 'with the boys'.

I'm not trying to say your wrong but I think you must have your doubts about what you've done or you wouldn't have posted on here, I think the replies you've got are very cruel and selfish. If you can't treat someone you love to what could be the holiday of a lifetime, I don't know what kind of world we live. An afterthought, she won't want to live with you unless you she knows what you're like to live with and the only way she's gonna find out is by going on holiday, and she aint gonna want to live with someone who won't let her have the heating on when she's cold because she hasn't saved any money to pay the bills.
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Sorry i just dont agree with you. Maybe you have plenty of money to flutter away on people. I WOULD GIVE HER some money IF SHE ACTUALLY made the effort to save. Its not as if she goes without anything through the week and on the weekend, like a couple people said she wants to live in the REAL world where you cant have everything when your not got the money. Simple. After all its my 21st and she HAS NOT SAVED ONE PENNY. I just think it goes to show how much she cares for me and deep down as long as shes "ok" dont worry about me....

:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
 
VeNT said:
I think its more to do that he was being used.
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I had the impression it was more to do with trusting someone, the only way he could feel as though he was being used is if he doesn't trust her to pay back the money, in which case she is in the right to be angry.
 
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