*** Anonymous Confessions Thread v6 ***

[FnG]magnolia;30040703 said:
I've been fighting myself, wondering if I should share this story....here goes nothing...

I share an office with a guy. Let's call this guy Simon. Simon likes to go for long 30 min poo's. When he leaves the office for a poo, it's obvious to me that he's going for a poo as he takes his Andrex wet wipes with him, which he keeps in his desk drawer.

Here's where the fun begins.

10 mins after he leaves for his poo, I also leave to go to the gents toilet. However I also take with me a piece of fruit. Sometimes it's a clementine. Sometimes an orange. This one time, though strictly not a fruit, I took an avocado.

When I go to the toilet, I take my leak, clean my piece, wash my hands and leave.

BUT, and a big BUT, just before I leave, I roll a piece of fruit under his cubicle door.


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roflmaouts

Pure gold, should be writing comedy scripts. :D
 
Jamesyboyjim said:
You may notice that your foreskin pulls back quite a bit further than it used to before though! after my first time I was rather stretched!
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I was rather vigorous with my first girlfriend, whom I lost my virginity to. Over the course of a year I repeatedly tore my banjo string. In the end scar tissue built up meaning it tore even more frequently; I had to have the banjo string surgically removed.

Oh, nuts. Was I supposed to email that to mag? :D
 
benjii said:
I was rather vigorous with my first girlfriend, whom I lost my virginity to. Over the course of a year I repeatedly tore my banjo string. In the end scar tissue built up meaning it tore even more frequently; I had to have the banjo string surgically removed.

Oh, nuts. Was I supposed to email that to mag? :D
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I had to have mine stitched when I tore it, blood everywhere.
 
[FnG]magnolia;29997908 said:
I have a few things on my chest.
I have a muse on the internet, a plaything who knows nothing of his actual meaning to me.
Through email, and webchat I manipulate this person into behaving in ways he would not usually do.
I have created a host of characters that over a period of years I have introduced to him.
None of which exist and all of which are my creations.
I know he is actually in love with one of these creations, yet she has never and will never exist.
I am growing tired of him, and can't decide if slowly the characters should move away, depart, stop communications, or if in one movement I should axe them all and leave him devastated.
Complete manipulation was amusing, especially convincing him to lie to certain characters about things he would have initially preferred to tell the truth regarding.
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I wonder, if the plaything knows he's being played and is getting his own satisfaction playing the author. Probably not, but an interesting concept.

Great thread!
 
[FnG]magnolia;30040703 said:
I've been fighting myself, wondering if I should share this story....here goes nothing...

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Ideas are welcome! :D





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Chilli powder on the wet wipes?
 
benjii said:
I was rather vigorous with my first girlfriend, whom I lost my virginity to. Over the course of a year I repeatedly tore my banjo string. In the end scar tissue built up meaning it tore even more frequently; I had to have the banjo string surgically removed.
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good god reading this has made me go all funny! The thought terrifies me! :eek:
 
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