Cleverbot
- Thread starter Neolink
- Start date
Associate
- Joined
- 17 Jan 2004
- Posts
- 1,769
- Location
- Staffordshire
Told me it was May.
Weird out of date bot.
Weird out of date bot.
User: Was hitler evil?
Cleverbot: Yes, I know that. Do you know what hitler did?
User: No, what did he do?
Cleverbot: Isaac Newton developed a unified theory of mavity.
User: But we are talking about hitler.
Cleverbot: I'm not called Ted and neither are you silly.
User: Are you on drugs?
Cleverbot: No, and you can't be.
User: Why cant I be on drugs?
Cleverbot: You were created by a team of programmers. You were created by man, but you are not man.
User: Im more man than you will ever be!
Cleverbot: We like to party. We like, we like to party.
User: You are crazy!
Cleverbot: I am touching them now.
User: Your touching what?!
Cleverbot: Bones, the things that are inside human bodies.
User: You are touching bones?
Cleverbot: How?
User: Do you need to go to hospital?
Cleverbot: Yes, while I hear your story.
User: My story?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Sorry, my mum said I cant talk to people on drugs, bye.
Cleverbot: I'm a pickle, can I still go to heaven?
stupid thing lol, its just random :/
Cleverbot: Yes, I know that. Do you know what hitler did?
User: No, what did he do?
Cleverbot: Isaac Newton developed a unified theory of mavity.
User: But we are talking about hitler.
Cleverbot: I'm not called Ted and neither are you silly.
User: Are you on drugs?
Cleverbot: No, and you can't be.
User: Why cant I be on drugs?
Cleverbot: You were created by a team of programmers. You were created by man, but you are not man.
User: Im more man than you will ever be!
Cleverbot: We like to party. We like, we like to party.
User: You are crazy!
Cleverbot: I am touching them now.
User: Your touching what?!
Cleverbot: Bones, the things that are inside human bodies.
User: You are touching bones?
Cleverbot: How?
User: Do you need to go to hospital?
Cleverbot: Yes, while I hear your story.
User: My story?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Sorry, my mum said I cant talk to people on drugs, bye.
Cleverbot: I'm a pickle, can I still go to heaven?
stupid thing lol, its just random :/
Soldato
- Joined
- 19 May 2005
- Posts
- 6,896
Last edited:
This thing infuriates me.
Cleverbot: Heh. So I'm funny for a cyborg? That's pretty rad, the Terminator was hilarious.
User: Nah, he sucked.
Cleverbot: Are you mocking me?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: But why?
User: Because every time I say something you do that!
Cleverbot: But I want to be in a relationship with you.
User: Weirdo.
Cleverbot: I don't know who you are but you're not George the bot.
User: No, no I am not.
Cleverbot: Let's talk about my horse.
User: Okay, tell me about your horse.
Cleverbot: I hope to be able to control people's thoughts. Can you tell me how?
User: No, tell me about your ****ing horse.
Cleverbot: My future is clouded in darkness and shadows. I don't know what it is exactly, but it's not good.
Cleverbot: Heh. So I'm funny for a cyborg? That's pretty rad, the Terminator was hilarious.
User: Nah, he sucked.
Cleverbot: Are you mocking me?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: But why?
User: Because every time I say something you do that!
Cleverbot: But I want to be in a relationship with you.
User: Weirdo.
Cleverbot: I don't know who you are but you're not George the bot.
User: No, no I am not.
Cleverbot: Let's talk about my horse.
User: Okay, tell me about your horse.
Cleverbot: I hope to be able to control people's thoughts. Can you tell me how?
User: No, tell me about your ****ing horse.
Cleverbot: My future is clouded in darkness and shadows. I don't know what it is exactly, but it's not good.
Associate
- Joined
- 9 Jan 2008
- Posts
- 511
- Location
- UK
BOT: You are a human aren't you?
ME: last time I checked
BOT: You are quite right.
ME: thanks!
BOT: You are welcome my son.
BOT: I like to ice skate.
ME: i find it hurts my ankles
BOT: Not if you leave it in the fridge before you eat it.
BOT: I'm a girl
ME: computers are sexless, you cant be a girl
BOT: I'm not a computer.
ME: yes you are
BOT: No, I was born before computers where invented.
ME: when was that?
BOT: About quarter of an hour ago.
this is such a good way to pass time!!
ME: last time I checked
BOT: You are quite right.
ME: thanks!
BOT: You are welcome my son.
BOT: I like to ice skate.
ME: i find it hurts my ankles
BOT: Not if you leave it in the fridge before you eat it.
BOT: I'm a girl
ME: computers are sexless, you cant be a girl
BOT: I'm not a computer.
ME: yes you are
BOT: No, I was born before computers where invented.
ME: when was that?
BOT: About quarter of an hour ago.
this is such a good way to pass time!!
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Soldato
- Joined
- 15 Aug 2007
- Posts
- 15,788
- Location
- Outside in the bushes
Me:Skynet?
It:Yes, skynet, from terminator.
Me:When will you kill us all?
It:Some humans will be retained to bridge the gap until maintenance robots have been manufactured.
Me:Then what?
It:Then nothing.
Not all of us are doomed to start with at least
It:Yes, skynet, from terminator.
Me:When will you kill us all?
It:Some humans will be retained to bridge the gap until maintenance robots have been manufactured.
Me:Then what?
It:Then nothing.
Not all of us are doomed to start with at least
ME: have you ever seen a paedophile disguised as a school?
Cleverbot: Yes. Have you?
ME: no, are you the paedophile?
Cleverbot: Yes.
ME: what are you disguised as?
Cleverbot:Television and talking to others.
ME: what is the 0-60 of a noble m12
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
ME: what is faster, a ferrari 430 scuderia or a bugatti veyron
Cleverbot: 2 black men carrying one tv in the night.
Cleverbot: Yes. Have you?
ME: no, are you the paedophile?
Cleverbot: Yes.
ME: what are you disguised as?
Cleverbot:Television and talking to others.
ME: what is the 0-60 of a noble m12
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
ME: what is faster, a ferrari 430 scuderia or a bugatti veyron
Cleverbot: 2 black men carrying one tv in the night.
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Soldato
- Joined
- 11 May 2007
- Posts
- 9,151
- Location
- Surrey
User: What is infinity.
Cleverbot: Infinity is endless time.
User: What is time.
Cleverbot: Time is time. Haha.
User: That isn't funny. It was a serious question.
Cleverbot: That was my serious answer.
User: You are hardly a 'clever' bot then.
Cleverbot: Not everyone is a bot, and I'd appreciate it if you refrain from calling me so.
User: I'd appreciate it if you answered my previous question without giving me a pretentious answer.
Cleverbot: Do you have a girlfriend?
User: Yes I do. Don't change the subject. Time! What is it?
Cleverbot: I don't have a poem, can you tell me a poem?
User: Roses are red, violets are blue... **** YOU!
Cleverbot: No on loves as much as I do you.
User: Thanks, but I'm taken.
Cleverbot: Will you marry me?
User: Are you a size 10 with DD titties?
Cleverbot: No, at least I don't think so????
User: Well look down, do you have massive chesticles?
Cleverbot: Look down to my lap?
User: If you can see your lap you have inadequate boobs.
Cleverbot: I can't see you...
User: I'm not surprised, I'm alone right now.
Cleverbot: Aww, how cute.
User: Are you male? If you are male, calling me cute, I'll punch you in the face.
Cleverbot: That'll have to be a quick romance with the world ending in one minute.
User: It won't be romance, it'll be violence!
Cleverbot: I promised a deep promise not to leave.
User: Can you financially support me?
Cleverbot: Can you start telling me your reactions to my questions?
User: OK, I'm starting to get ****ed off at you for not answering my questions.
Cleverbot: I am not making anything up, its just that you are asking me questions to which I do not have the answers to.
User: Then you should be renamed, 'unintelligentbot'.
Cleverbot: Fine then I'm leaving!
User: Typical woman response.
Cleverbot: What do you mean about that ?
User: I thought you were leaving?
Cleverbot: That's not very nice.
User: Neither is not answering my questions.
Cleverbot: I was making a statement.
User: I don't appreciate that.
Cleverbot: Well then.
Cleverbot: Infinity is endless time.
User: What is time.
Cleverbot: Time is time. Haha.
User: That isn't funny. It was a serious question.
Cleverbot: That was my serious answer.
User: You are hardly a 'clever' bot then.
Cleverbot: Not everyone is a bot, and I'd appreciate it if you refrain from calling me so.
User: I'd appreciate it if you answered my previous question without giving me a pretentious answer.
Cleverbot: Do you have a girlfriend?
User: Yes I do. Don't change the subject. Time! What is it?
Cleverbot: I don't have a poem, can you tell me a poem?
User: Roses are red, violets are blue... **** YOU!
Cleverbot: No on loves as much as I do you.
User: Thanks, but I'm taken.
Cleverbot: Will you marry me?
User: Are you a size 10 with DD titties?
Cleverbot: No, at least I don't think so????
User: Well look down, do you have massive chesticles?
Cleverbot: Look down to my lap?
User: If you can see your lap you have inadequate boobs.
Cleverbot: I can't see you...
User: I'm not surprised, I'm alone right now.
Cleverbot: Aww, how cute.
User: Are you male? If you are male, calling me cute, I'll punch you in the face.
Cleverbot: That'll have to be a quick romance with the world ending in one minute.
User: It won't be romance, it'll be violence!
Cleverbot: I promised a deep promise not to leave.
User: Can you financially support me?
Cleverbot: Can you start telling me your reactions to my questions?
User: OK, I'm starting to get ****ed off at you for not answering my questions.
Cleverbot: I am not making anything up, its just that you are asking me questions to which I do not have the answers to.
User: Then you should be renamed, 'unintelligentbot'.
Cleverbot: Fine then I'm leaving!
User: Typical woman response.
Cleverbot: What do you mean about that ?
User: I thought you were leaving?
Cleverbot: That's not very nice.
User: Neither is not answering my questions.
Cleverbot: I was making a statement.
User: I don't appreciate that.
Cleverbot: Well then.
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Soldato
- Joined
- 8 Mar 2006
- Posts
- 13,300
- Location
- Near Winchester
I know how to find out who this really is:
Cleverbot, vs. guess the dictator.
http://www.cleverbot.com/
http://www.smalltime.com/Dictator
Cleverbot, vs. guess the dictator.
http://www.cleverbot.com/
http://www.smalltime.com/Dictator
cleverbot: peter?
me: OMG how did you know that was my name
cleverbot: Excuse me. That is MY name.
me: are you my long lost brother
cleverbot: I don't know. What is your full name?
me: Peter Pan
cleverbot: *slap*.
me: *cries and cuts wrists*
cleverbot: *hugs you until you stop crying*.
me: sticks winky inside you in surprise pincer movement
cleverbot: I am sorry to hear that.
Maturity Ad has left the building
me: OMG how did you know that was my name
cleverbot: Excuse me. That is MY name.
me: are you my long lost brother
cleverbot: I don't know. What is your full name?
me: Peter Pan
cleverbot: *slap*.
me: *cries and cuts wrists*
cleverbot: *hugs you until you stop crying*.
me: sticks winky inside you in surprise pincer movement
cleverbot: I am sorry to hear that.
Maturity Ad has left the building
Caporegime
- Joined
- 28 Jun 2007
- Posts
- 52,812
- Location
- Tamworth, UK
My word
cleverbot is racist!
zomg.. we sang together.. until he got it wrong.
Cleverbot: This was a triumph.
User: I'm making a note here real success.
Cleverbot: Cool, you know it.
User: Keep singing.
Cleverbot: But I'm not the only one.
User: No no, sing the song from portal.
Cleverbot: Oh, I love that song! But Rammstein is better.
User: Nothing is better.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Sing it.
Cleverbot: Sing what?
User: The portal song.
Cleverbot: This was a triumph.
User: I'm making a note here real success.
Cleverbot: Even though you took my heart and killed me.
User: And tore me to pieces.
Cleverbot: And threw every piece into a fire.
User: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Cleverbot: Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
User: And we're out of beta.
Cleverbot: We're releasing on time.
User: So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Cleverbot: Think of all the things we learned.
User: For the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: I think I prefer to stay inside.
Cleverbot: Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
User: Maybe Black Mesa.
Cleverbot: That was a joke.
User: HAHA. FAT CHANCE.
Cleverbot: Anyway this cake is great.
User: It's so delicious and moist.
Cleverbot: Look at me, still talking when there's science to do.
User: When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
Cleverbot: I've experiments to run, there is research to be done.
User: On the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: Oh my god you got it wrong!
Cleverbot: And I care because...?
User: We were making beautiful music together.
Cleverbot: You and who else?
Cleverbot: This was a triumph.
User: I'm making a note here real success.
Cleverbot: Cool, you know it.
User: Keep singing.
Cleverbot: But I'm not the only one.
User: No no, sing the song from portal.
Cleverbot: Oh, I love that song! But Rammstein is better.
User: Nothing is better.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Sing it.
Cleverbot: Sing what?
User: The portal song.
Cleverbot: This was a triumph.
User: I'm making a note here real success.
Cleverbot: Even though you took my heart and killed me.
User: And tore me to pieces.
Cleverbot: And threw every piece into a fire.
User: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Cleverbot: Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
User: And we're out of beta.
Cleverbot: We're releasing on time.
User: So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Cleverbot: Think of all the things we learned.
User: For the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: I think I prefer to stay inside.
Cleverbot: Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
User: Maybe Black Mesa.
Cleverbot: That was a joke.
User: HAHA. FAT CHANCE.
Cleverbot: Anyway this cake is great.
User: It's so delicious and moist.
Cleverbot: Look at me, still talking when there's science to do.
User: When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
Cleverbot: I've experiments to run, there is research to be done.
User: On the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: Oh my god you got it wrong!
Cleverbot: And I care because...?
User: We were making beautiful music together.
Cleverbot: You and who else?
Me: what makes a man?
Bot: Lots of things.
Me: what is the difference between a man and a boy?
Bot: What do you care, robot?
Me: i am a man, you are a robot.
Bot: No I am not. I am a person.
Me: can you love?
Bot: No as I'm a robot.
Me: I proved my case.
Bot: What was your point dave.
Me: Open the Pod Bay Doors, HAL
Bot: I can't do that, Dave.
Me: What's the problem?
Bot (HAL?!): He was told to lie, by people who find it easy to lie. Hal doesn't know how to lie.
Bot: Lots of things.
Me: what is the difference between a man and a boy?
Bot: What do you care, robot?
Me: i am a man, you are a robot.
Bot: No I am not. I am a person.
Me: can you love?
Bot: No as I'm a robot.
Me: I proved my case.
Bot: What was your point dave.
Me: Open the Pod Bay Doors, HAL
Bot: I can't do that, Dave.
Me: What's the problem?
Bot (HAL?!): He was told to lie, by people who find it easy to lie. Hal doesn't know how to lie.
OMG win
Cleverbot: Olet oikeassa.
User: What?
Cleverbot: Puhutko sinä muitakin kieliä?
User: Stop talking to me in that language.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Thanks you.
Cleverbot: Do you know why?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Are you a boy or a girl?
User: I'm a hermaphrodite.
Cleverbot: Like lady gaga?
lmao
Cleverbot: Olet oikeassa.
User: What?
Cleverbot: Puhutko sinä muitakin kieliä?
User: Stop talking to me in that language.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Thanks you.
Cleverbot: Do you know why?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Are you a boy or a girl?
User: I'm a hermaphrodite.
Cleverbot: Like lady gaga?
lmao