Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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lol oh dear!

ok i need some advise lads! Two things actually....

1)
So yonks ago a guy on match emailed me. He seemed nice so I replied to his email at the same time as thinking "hmm he actually looks like my friend's type". He then a few weeks back approached the subject of meeting. By this point I had a strong feeling he's not my type but figured ok I will meet him.
But he seemed to be a bit awkward about it. He suggested a date but i wasn't free. I've suggested occasions when i'm free but he doesn't want to meet on those days.

Sounds mean probably but I've realised now I'm definitely not interested and in a polite way have said to him "look shall we just leave it because you're too far away anyway"
But he's being persistant. I've tried putting him off and he then came back and decided he wanted to meet on one of the days I originally suggested. Now he's changed his mind again so even if I was interested he's being annoying about meeting up.
Im thinking of emailing him and saying politely that he's a nice guy etc but that i've recently met someone (I havent!) and am looking to see how things develop.

Would that be too mean? Hope it doesn't seem like i've strung him along. I've tried saying no to meeting and he won't get the hint.

I've actually now forgotten the second thing I needed advise on lol

edit: aha! I've remembered the second thing now lol

Ok...

If i went to the cinema with a male friend (let's call him Bob) to see a chick flick would it give him the wrong impression? basically this friend sometimes says how he likes talking to me because i'm nice, thinks im lovely etc. (which is fair enough!) although recently has said that he think's we will be good pals.

However, in the past when i went to see a chick flick with another male pal (let's call him Jeff) he obviously read the signs wrong and thought it was a date because the next day he was saying to me "oh I went on this date last night to the cinema with this amazing girl etc etc"
Although to be fair Jeff is reallllly perverted at times (and i mean creepy kind of perverted!) so i don't know if that's just him or not?

Bob has suggested going to the cinema sometime and said we could see a chick flick that I was wanting to see. (Was meant to see it with forum fella but obviously now can't meet till 17th :()
To me it's all innocent, but I don't want to send him the wrong signals.
 
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Hey,

I like your idea of dropping him a mail saying you have met somoene. Make sure you clearly say "you dont want to meet now" but do the girl thing of saying you would like to keep in contact?

This Internet dating thing is supposed to be easy! Id just delete him and not give it a second thought...
 
secretspy said:
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Tell MATCH.com guy you just met someone else, and make it clear you are not interested.

Tell Bob of your intention and leave no room for doubt that it's only a friend taking a friend to the cinema. I know girls like to play nice and don't want to hurt a guy's feelings but the truth is better than doubt.
 
Gotta thank this thread - I read it as a joke and seen you guys talking about pov.com so checked it out and signed up for a laugh, met a girl there and going with her now :) couldnt be happier :) cheers lads
 
secretspy said:
1

So yonks ago a guy on match emailed me. He seemed nice so.........
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Meh, give the guy a little honesty. Might be mean in the short term but in the long term he might learn something from it.

"Look, you seem like a nice guy but all the messing around you have done with days and times to meet up has put me off, I gave you the chance the first time around and even with a second one you cannot find time to agree on a date. Sorry"

Job done!

As for point 2 - Don't feel obliged to intentionally not be yourself so you do not give the 'wrong signals', it's not your job to take command of some other guys interpretation and perhaps expectations/hopes. If you think they get it wrong, tell them straight.
 
thanks for the advise

although I wouldn't know how to say Bob "look this is just friends going to the cinema" because sometimes i get the impression he might expect more and sometimes its just that he thinks im a great friend.

I dont want him to think im being bigheaded by saying anything about it.

edit: I think I will leave it and then if he gets the wrong impression afterwards I will say something
 
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The worst thing you could do is be presumptuous about his intentions and risk offending him, be yourself - You are not giving him signals, and your not leading him on or being cruel.

Chill :)
 
yeah that's what i was thinking. I was just a bit unsure because he was saying the same things as Jeff was so I didn't know if it was going down that route again!

on another note...

Forum fella is working so obviously not on msn and I can't text him because of my stupid phone but I'm actually really missing talking to him!

So if you're reading this.....Helllllllooooooooo lol :D
 
Sin_Chase said:
The worst thing you could do is be presumptuous about his intentions and risk offending him, be yourself - You are not giving him signals, and your not leading him on or being cruel.

Chill :)
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I disagree. The guy obviously fancies her.

I suggest jokingly (but seriously) mentioning that there will be no funny business in the back row. Otherwise he might try and kiss you which is gonna be more awkward.
 
so brief update..

now that im sort of swaying towards one guy, i now seem to be getting several winks/emails each week.

(why is it that when you want loads you get hardly any, then when your not fussed they all come flooding in?! lol)

Met one of the guys recently who i've been in contact with since I joined...he seems really lovely although quite shy but because of his "situation" i'm not sure if there would be room for a long term relationship without the risk of it ending purely because he decides to go back home. Plus i don't know if he matched me enough for it to actually be comfortable if we did go down that road.

there's another one im due to meet soon and seem to be getting on really well with him so will see how it goes. I'm looking forward to it though :)
 
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My search is a 10 mile radius from where i live but i've been getting messages from people who live in the likes of Derby and Sheffield lol

Although one guy who i used to speak to said we were too far yet his search was 40 miles from where he lived
 
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