Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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theDude said:
hahaha, but what if your first date over runs?
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milgo said:
ApeZ, what will you do if they ask you what you are doing in the evening? Just in general "oh isn't it cold today" type chat.
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Doubt it will overrun, it's just a coffee and she said she'd show me around her town. There's 3-4 hours between the meets, and I'm not expecting it to last that long.

If it does, then I'll probably just be honest and say that I have to dash off to meet another friend, or make some excuse about family. I've got the train times memorised, so logistics shouldn't be a problem. :)
 
Well been chatting to a lass on POF lately and we seem to be getting on well. Swapped numbers and have been texting each other quite a lot. Travelling down to see her next week.
 
RoachycaL said:
Thanks for the advice mate. I'm on OKCupid and it displays on a persons profile if they reply to messages very often. I don't want my profile to change to "replies selectively" so I might just reply, maybe make an excuse up or something.
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Don't reply. The only reason to get into a conversation on OKC is if you're interested in finding out more about them. Anything else is a waste of everyone's time.

apeZ said:
Good, because the majority of a woman's inbox are 'hi nice ****, dtf?'
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Many women actually say in their profiles that they do respond to people who write decent messages and not to be put off by 'Replies very selectively', which it only says because they are bombarded with crap.
 
TJM said:
Many women actually say in their profiles that they do respond to people who write decent messages and not to be put off by 'Replies very selectively', which it only says because they are bombarded with crap.
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Doesn't stop the posers and idiots replying to trolling :D, one less time waster for all of us, win!
 
PianoBasher said:
LOL! What is dtf though?
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secretspy said:
Do the fandango? :p

Date this Friday?
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PianoBasher said:
Gawd knows.

I can't sleep until I know!

Do They Float?
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thewanted said:
Pretty sure it stands for "down to ****". It's from Jersey Shore (MTV show).
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This, basically.

Has anyone else exchanged messages people on OKC/POF who are really shy/nervous about meeting up? I've been speaking to one girl for a while, but every time I mention grabbing a coffee she's either busy or changes the subject.

I had one date before and she texted me when I was on my way saying that she was suffering from 'crippling nervousness'. It showed, but she was sweet and seemed to be a bit more comfortable as the date went on. Maybe it was her first meet or something, idk.

I had butterflies (yes, I'm a man) in my stomach the first two dates, but since then I've been pretty cool and relaxed about meeting up. *shrug*
 
apeZ said:
This, basically.

Has anyone else exchanged messages people on OKC/POF who are really shy/nervous about meeting up? I've been speaking to one girl for a while, but every time I mention grabbing a coffee she's either busy or changes the subject.

I had one date before and she texted me when I was on my way saying that she was suffering from 'crippling nervousness'. It showed, but she was sweet and seemed to be a bit more comfortable as the date went on. Maybe it was her first meet or something, idk.

I had butterflies (yes, I'm a man) in my stomach the first two dates, but since then I've been pretty cool and relaxed about meeting up. *shrug*
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It's natural and probably good to get a bit nervous. Personally if someone doesn't seem to want to meet up after a few asks I will give up. I want to meet someone in real life, not just have an online pen pal.

To me it says they don't really want to. If you want something you will do it even if you are really nervous. Like the girl you mention.
 
Signed up to POF again dunno why I do it.
I hate how kind of vain it makes you, always checking to see who has viewed you etc..
I did rubbish last time I was on it, mind you I didn't give it much chance and didn't message all that many but its finding something to catch their attention with in the first place.
 
Advice needed! I started messaging this girl last night asking her a few different questions because her profile is rather empty. She seems nice but when she replies, she never asks me any questions back. She replied again this morning but pretty much ignoring what I asked and just talks about one thing.

Is this a sign that she isn't interested? Should I pursue further or just leave it? Maybe if I leave it a few days she might be inclined enough to message me again? :p
 
[FnG]magnolia;21181702 said:
Hey, take my smiley face out if it bothers you. I was actually saying that I liked his general approach but there were areas where I'd do things differently. I'm sure he is capable of ignoring them if they don't fit with his stance on things.

Are we offering critique or not?

e : just read my post again. How on earth can that not be viewed as constructive? For every negative point that I saw, I offered options. For the bits I like, I said I liked them. What more could I have done?
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Don't worry! While I can kinda see where they are coming from I took it all constructively and liked the fact you took the time to take it apart.

I'll have a look at my profile later and go see about including some of your comments.

The whole conversational/facts argument is something I was thinking at the time. It's a dating site so shouldn't your profile be like they are actually interacting with you rather than just stating the facts? Not sure myself but having looked through a few profiles what I don't like is those that just give a couple of lines and/or a list of likes and dislikes!

boYce said:
Is my profile really that bad? Lots of messages sent out and still nothing back.

I'll take it on the chin so be honest, how could I improve it?

http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=16614431
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If I was a girl I'd definitely reply...;)

So I take it this is like real life where the guy has to do all the chasing and approaching or do women actually instigate contact/messages as well?:p

Finally what's the best way of messaging someone? Just a line or two or a couple of paragraphs concentrating on their profile?
 
Amp34 said:
Finally what's the best way of messaging someone? Just a line or two or a couple of paragraphs concentrating on their profile?
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Line or two. Don't go for paragraphs in the first message.

Pick out on something in her profile "I see that you like ..., have you been to ..." or her pictures. Example - a girl I messaged had a picture of the Golden Gate Bridge so I brought it up in a message - that led to a discussion about travel, America, future ambitions etc.

I would avoid compliments on physical appearance, girls probably get those all the time. I've heard that it is best to avoid complimenting something that a girl can't change - physical looks, eye colour, size. Instead, pick out something e.g. an unique item of clothing, location etc and focus on that.

Another note: If you are using POF ALWAYS ALWAYS change the default subject line. Guess what? Most people don't, so a lot of girls have an endless stream of 'Hi' messages in their inboxes. The number one rule for dating sites seems to be to stand out. You have to be different to everyone else.
 
apeZ said:
Another note: If you are using POF ALWAYS ALWAYS change the default subject line. Guess what? Most people don't, so a lot of girls have an endless stream of 'Hi' messages in their inboxes. The number one rule for dating sites seems to be to stand out. You have to be different to everyone else.
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You don't get subjects any more online, it's threaded message view and it sucks! Not sure how it shows in apps though.
 
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