Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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Charlotte1988 said:
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Captain Planet said:
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I agree with what both of you have said. In all honesty I think after a week really you should know if you should meet up. I dated a girl in Liverpool for a few bit, was a big risk if we didn't get on in person as it's about 4 hours from me but after a week I think we both just needed to know if we got on in person. No point as you've said and other have in the past talking for a month + then meeting and not getting on, such a waste of time and to be honest time is not something you can get back.

I've been guilty of asking someone to meet up after a few days before, I think it's good to gauge if you have that chemistry in person.
 
cHk4 said:
I agree with what both of you have said. In all honesty I think after a week really you should know if you should meet up. I dated a girl in Liverpool for a few bit, was a big risk if we didn't get on in person as it's about 4 hours from me but after a week I think we both just needed to know if we got on in person. No point as you've said and other have in the past talking for a month + then meeting and not getting on, such a waste of time and to be honest time is not something you can get back.

I've been guilty of asking someone to meet up after a few days before, I think it's good to gauge if you have that chemistry in person.
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So it didn't work out with the girl from Liverpool?

I think a few days is fine tbh. The guys who annoy me are the ones whose first messages are 'hi, I like your profile. Let's meet for a coffee today'. Too soon and he probably didn't even read my profile :rolleyes:!
I felt a bit bad for one guy because he at least tried. I'd written in my profile that I like The Simpsons and he wrote 'I'd like to take a coffee with Bart - when is he free?', haha! I wasn't really interested though :rolleyes:
 
Charlotte1988 said:
So it didn't work out with the girl from Liverpool?

I think a few days is fine tbh. The guys who annoy me are the ones whose first messages are 'hi, I like your profile. Let's meet for a coffee today'. Too soon and he probably didn't even read my profile :rolleyes:!
I felt a bit bad for one guy because he at least tried. I'd written in my profile that I like The Simpsons and he wrote 'I'd like to take a coffee with Bart - when is he free?', haha! I wasn't really interested though :rolleyes:
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Nah turns out she was slightly crazy lol. I'd never been to Liverpool before so it was a good experience plus with my job I get 75% off of travel, made a few random friends too from going out in the evening so worth it in my opinion. I also enjoyed the journey if I'm honest, just chilling out for like 4 hours after work listening to music was cool.

Haha, yea that's a little too soon, I had one talk to me and within a day she wanted to meet, it set alarm bells off and it turns out she had 6 kids... I must admit it does get annoying when they ask you questions which are on your profile like "What do you do for a living." Well it does kind of say on my profile. Yea it's nice when you get people that make the effort but normally they are the ones you're not interested in :(
 
mrk said:
Some people are just like that! I had a similar experience last year, I don't do the online dating thing but a girl I went to school & college with added and messaged me on Facebook and said she had a thing for me the whole time but didn't say anything. We chatted for a while like old friends catching up, then one day poof...gone without a trace.

So yeah I agree because you sit there wondering why waste the time and effort if you're just going to vanish randomly! At least it would be nice to keep in touch surely.
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I think this happened basically because you took too long to get to the point. Most girls doesn't want to chit chat so nicely for ever, there is a limit to their patience. And also if they are hot there are probably lots of opportunities for them to forget about you. And they may also come to the conclusion that you are a sweet little puppy dog not the fierce man bear they thought you were.

If a girl you like basically fb's you saying you are her cup of tea etc then you shouldnt be doing too much talking after that, you should be complimenting her on her good taste and suggesting a cup of coffee in the next couple of days.
 
When I say gone without a trace I mean no Facebook or anything any more.

More to the point though, I didn't feel the same way about her either back then or a year ago, sure I liked her and everything but more as a friend than anything else and I think that much was obvious from our conversations. It just seemed like something happened one day in her life and all of a sudden...gone.

As for fierce man bear, :D, I've never been that! Or at least don't think I've ever come across as one, sure I did bad things in school but who hasn't? That all changed come college. I am who I am :eek:

I understand what you're saying though don't get me wrong! My situation is a bit more complicated though - I know I know...cliche++ :(
 
Mammalian said:
the issue as i've put, i've wrote one good message to get a reply, but then i get a useless reply, i write another and then seem to get nothing so 5th time am now turning to how others would approach this. it's not rocket science no which is why i'm not a rocket scientist
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Sorry dude I thought you meant "Hey" was their first message to you and not a reply to a decent message you sent. In that case I would probably just leave it.
 
i agree for the first message, as long as it's not god aweful then i think you just need them to be attracted to you.

at a guess, i'd say like for me, a girl instead of searching and messaging new guys in one big go, they'll just read their inbox and reply quickly to each one they have an interest in, but then this'll lead possibly to 5/10 guys now sending them a longer message back trying to get to know them, which will quickly get boring so they'll pick perhaps the best one or even just the first that replies and leave the rest to later, but after 7/8 days you can't really reply out of the blue when it's obvious you've been online.
 
just thought i'd let you know on something that suprised me just now.

so i've messaged a fair few girls on pof over the last week (to the point i'm shocked there is any left), and there is a few in particular i really liked but didn't get a reply from. I thought don't want to message again as it seems needy, but tbh if after a couple days there is no reply i doubt there ever will be one so what's the loss right, so any way i wrote a funny message joking about how must have got lost in the post and here's my address (gave a hilarious one) and i'm here waiting.

5 minutes later i get a reply, 5 later and another from the 2 girls i messaged it. might just simple by lucky chance, but could also be that they get so many messages it's too easy to say i'll reply later, but then forget or not bother, but then get a second from the same person, as long as it doesn't come across as needy then they'll think oh yeah i should do that now before i forget.

any way, i'm off to reply to these 2 girls, as long with my couple of 'hey' messages.
 
Mammalian said:
just thought i'd let you know on something that suprised me just now.

so i've messaged a fair few girls on pof over the last week (to the point i'm shocked there is any left), and there is a few in particular i really liked but didn't get a reply from. I thought don't want to message again as it seems needy, but tbh if after a couple days there is no reply i doubt there ever will be one so what's the loss right, so any way i wrote a funny message joking about how must have got lost in the post and here's my address (gave a hilarious one) and i'm here waiting.

5 minutes later i get a reply, 5 later and another from the 2 girls i messaged it. might just simple by lucky chance, but could also be that they get so many messages it's too easy to say i'll reply later, but then forget or not bother, but then get a second from the same person, as long as it doesn't come across as needy then they'll think oh yeah i should do that now before i forget.

any way, i'm off to reply to these 2 girls, as long with my couple of 'hey' messages.
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Witty stuff like that just works.
 
mrbell1984 said:
^^ What was your funny address?
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Charming Guy, Mr Right Street, etc...


As said this could just be chance but at least it's a boost towards feeling a bit better about myself, as i'm messaging girls i know in person i'd be trying to get rid of on nights out, but online they ignore my message, which is fine for a few but when you send plenty of messages just to get a reply and perhaps experience messaging girls online, and i know that it mainly comes down to my photo which i think is decent, then it can be confidence breaking, tiny bit by tiny bit.
 
Just taken the plunge on Match. I hate writing about myself... it comes across as so cheesy/cocky/crap. Gonna be some serious editing over the next few days methinks...
 
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