Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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Mammalian said:
only a few things, which tbh are minor and the opinion of some one who is very much different to you. i also will be completely honest here, other members were to me and it worked a treat.

for starters you're 29 and list clubbing as an interest, i'd say if a girl listed clubbing as an interes past 23/24 it's a downer in my opinion of them (not a big one though), but you're 29 so you're looking to attract i'd sa 25-30 all of which i assume will have grown up by now and not looking for a clubber. i'd still list you're a dj though.

your first photo is the best, in fact i'd say the only decent one of you, even if you're hiding behind glasses. you may get people seeing your first photo, so then viewing your profile, and then being turned off from the rest "fun" ones. i know i had a lot once and members advised me to shorten it, i've now got just one which i think is enough as it shows me smiling and quite clearly me, which imo is working better.

"Hey ladies" isn't a great start, sounds like a lame chat up line. Hey will do, if that. writing hey imo is as bad as writing "thanks for reading"

i'd lose the scooter photo as you don'ty own a car. not owning a ca at 29 might be something you can get away, but owning a scooter imo wont. 16 year olds own scooters. gives the impression, along with the clubbing etc, that you haven't grown up yet.

i don't list music either, though i do like it when girls list what they like, as being a guy it's us who looks for them, reads their profile and then sends the first message, and then girls select the ones they like out of the 100 offers they've had that day alone, and read the profile, which imo needs to be simple and enough to get them interested, but not too much that they know some basics about you. i like to be able to surprise a girl that i'm into the same music as her in a convo. today i asked a girl what she'd been listening to today as she LOVES music, and then she asked me, i listed a song she has mentioned she really likes in her profile, and asked if she'd heard of it jokingly, and she wrote back she loves me ;)

as mentioned though, we're clearly different people, and i have seen plenty girls like guys like you, however imo you're too old to realistically find a girl your age who's still into that.
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Thanks for the feedback mate. Have updated it and removed the pics, reason I have no car is I suffer epilepsy and just recently had a seizure :(
 
Mammalian said:
only a few things, which tbh are minor and the opinion of some one who is very much different to you. i also will be completely honest here, other members were to me and it worked a treat.

for starters you're 29 and list clubbing as an interest, i'd say if a girl listed clubbing as an interes past 23/24 it's a downer in my opinion of them (not a big one though), but you're 29 so you're looking to attract i'd sa 25-30 all of which i assume will have grown up by now and not looking for a clubber. i'd still list you're a dj though.
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Disagree. Plenty of people in their late 20's, 30's or older like clubbing.

Mammalian said:
i'd lose the scooter photo as you don'ty own a car. not owning a ca at 29 might be something you can get away, but owning a scooter imo wont. 16 year olds own scooters. gives the impression, along with the clubbing etc, that you haven't grown up yet.
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You can't get away with owning a scooter at 29? :confused:

Mammalian said:
i don't list music either.
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Music chat has always worked well for me and I think listing bands you like makes first emails much easier.

I'd just whack up some better pics Dez. The ones you have now are fine but girls will want a clearer picture as you can't really tell what you look like.
 
Got the "I see you more as a friend" text earlier on today. I know it's an easy way for someone to say they don't want to see you any more but has anyone managed to keep in touch as friends afterwards?
 
maj said:
Got the "I see you more as a friend" text earlier on today. I know it's an easy way for someone to say they don't want to see you any more but has anyone managed to keep in touch as friends afterwards?
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Just move on dude. I know it's hard, but being friend zoned is not cool :(
 
NeoReloaded said:
Just move on dude. I know it's hard, but being friend zoned is not cool :(
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Yeah does feel like she has taken pity on me as with all others I've dated we've both agreed to stop the contact once we knew we wouldn't see each other again.

Prior to her text we had arranged to go off-road go-karting next weekend for my birthday which is still going ahead, albeit just as friends. Both have said the day won't be awkward (she is wanting a lift there and back) but I'm having second thoughts about it.
 
maj said:
Yeah does feel like she has taken pity on me as with all others I've dated we've both agreed to stop the contact once we knew we wouldn't see each other again.

Prior to her text we had arranged to go off-road go-karting next weekend for my birthday which is still going ahead, albeit just as friends. Both have said the day won't be awkward (she is wanting a lift there and back) but I'm having second thoughts about it.
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Just go with it and at the end of the day go in for a kiss and if she backs off then just jump in your car and leave her standing there. She will have a lot of time to think on the bus home!
 
maj said:
Got the "I see you more as a friend" text earlier on today. I know it's an easy way for someone to say they don't want to see you any more but has anyone managed to keep in touch as friends afterwards?
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Yep! I am still friends with 6/7 of my POF dates.

Depends what has happened between you I guess.
 
Jambo said:
Yep! I am still friends with 6/7 of my POF dates.

Depends what has happened between you I guess.
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How often do you keep in touch and how? I'm not sure how much I'll see her after my birthday which may be a good or a bad thing. Might be we just keep in touch via text and facebook but I guess we'll see.

It was early days between us. 2nd date was supposed to be tonight and had been arranged all week but we were in touch daily (more me texting her than her texting me) but the texts were just me asking how she was and how work had been etc but she'd always reply. We'd then spent a good hour or so after she had finished work talking about all sorts. In her text she said she really likes me and we got on great but the spark wasn't there and she thought we were more suited as friends.
 
maj said:
How often do you keep in touch and how? I'm not sure how much I'll see her after my birthday which may be a good or a bad thing. Might be we just keep in touch via text and facebook but I guess we'll see.

It was early days between us. 2nd date was supposed to be tonight and had been arranged all week but we were in touch daily (more me texting her than her texting me) but the texts were just me asking how she was and how work had been etc but she'd always reply. We'd then spent a good hour or so after she had finished work talking about all sorts. In her text she said she really likes me and we got on great but the spark wasn't there and she thought we were more suited as friends.
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Actually it's 5/6. And number 7 I don't really want to stay friends with but it's a work in progress. :D

Girl 1) I talk to her on the phone all the time but she lives quite far away so only see her now and again. She is my stand in wife. :D
Girl 2) Facebook/text and meet up once or twice a year.
Girl 3) Facebook/text and meet if we're at the same gig or whatever.
Girl 4) I'm trying to phase her out really, she wants to be friends but she lives too far away.
Girl 5) Facebook and will see her at gigs.

PS I sent girl 6 the lets be friends text (although I didn't really want to be) and she never replied!! :D

I think I'm giving up now, it is too much hard work, stress and expense and I quite enjoy being single anyway. I got another girls number for a date but I think I'm going to leave it. I've not seen enough pictures and I can't be bothered with another disappointment.
 
Jambo said:
Actually it's 5/6. And number 7 I don't really want to stay friends with but it's a work in progress. :D

Girl 1) I talk to her on the phone all the time but she lives quite far away so only see her now and again. She is my stand in wife. :D
Girl 2) Facebook/text and meet up once or twice a year.
Girl 3) Facebook/text and meet if we're at the same gig or whatever.
Girl 4) I'm trying to phase her out really, she wants to be friends but she lives too far away.
Girl 5) Facebook and will see her at gigs.

PS I sent girl 6 the lets be friends text (although I didn't really want to be) and she never replied!! :D

I think I'm giving up now, it is too much hard work, stress and expense and I quite enjoy being single anyway. I got another girls number for a date but I think I'm going to leave it. I've not seen enough pictures and I can't be bothered with another disappointment.
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Thats the problem with online dating as I see it. I've been on quite a few dates and they're not what I'm looking for so I usually end up stopping the contact. But now I'm bored of the whole dating thing I just can't be bothered.
 
POF annoys me, dunno where im going wrong. I send a few messages out and get a response from a few - conversation will last for about a day or so and it ends. What am I doing wrong :/
 
I've had 9 people want to "meet" me.

And I've chatted to about 2 people, 1st one went on 2 weeks until I decided to not message her back, it was becoming too hard to think what to say!! She was 18, I am 23, and she is in Lancaster, I am in York/Mcr.

Second girl, also messages me first like the first girl, lasted not long, really don't know what to say.

I have never had any success in sending a message to a girl first, never any replies
 
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