Make bad chatup lines even worse

Status
Not open for further replies.
Original: Do you sleep on your stomach? [any answer] Can I?
Ruined: Do you sleep on your stomach? [any answer] You should, it'll cover your face up.

Original: Did it hurt? Woman: Did what hurt? When you fell out of heaven?
Ruined: Did it hurt? Woman: Did what hurt? When you were beaten about the face with a baseball bat?
 
Original:
"Is that a ladder in your tights? Or a stairway to Heaven?"

Ruined:
"Is that a ladder in your tights? Or the path to the fishmongers?"

:eek:
 
Original: Hi, can I buy you a drink?
Ruined: Hi, can I buy you a drink up the value of one pound fifty?

Original: Get your coat, you've pulled.
Ruined: Get your coat. If you can't find it, get me mine.

Original: After breakfast, should I call you or nudge you?
Ruined: After breakfast, how many meals is it for you until lunch? Damn.

Original: You must wash your clothes with Mr. Sheen because I can see myself in your pants.
Ruined: You must wash your clothes with Mr. Sheen, cos that ain't Chanel.
 
LMFAO this thread is amazing :p

made my boring AVCE ICT lesson go a lot quicker :p

always know where to go if i need a laugh - OcUK GD :D
 
Original: (while looking at stars) Baby, I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was sitting right next to me.
Ruined: (while looking at stars) Baby, I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, your ass is so big it blocked out the sky.

Original: See this pin? I want to ***** you with it to see if you truly do bleed sunshine
Ruined: See this pin? I want to ***** you with it to see if you pop like a balloon.

Original: Do you have a bandaid? Because I just scrapped my knee falling for you.
Ruined: Do you have a bandaid? You should use it to cover your mouth you annoying wench.
 
FYI, check out the "What?" section on that site, some bloody fantastic lines, including :

1. Hey baby... you got any diseases? Want some?
2. I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet.
3. If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? (No.) Well, I don't, so let's go.
4. So....I heard you wanted to fight me.
5. I've got a big nose, big hands, and really big feet. That's right, I'm a clown.

Holy crap! :confused:
 
"I wanna spank you with a sack of kidney beans while you cover yourself in whipped cream and let a horny duck named Jeff lick it off you."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
 
Org: "Do you want to see something swell?"
Runined: "Do you want to see something swell?" {kick her in shins} "Lollerskates I pwn j00 HAHAHAHAHAHA tbqfhkthxbye!"
 
Original: You know what I like about you? My arms!
Ruined: You know what I like about you? **** all.
 
i can get on that page :D

original: I think about you when I masturbate
ruined: I think about you when I vomit

hmm, maybe im not too good at this!

original: I'd walk a million miles over broken glass just to meet the guy that ****** you last
ruined: I'd walk a million miles over broken glass just to meet the guy that ****** you last, so i can get him admitted to a mental institution
 
"People say that masturbating will make you go blind, if that were true, not only would i be blind, but my seeing eyedog would have vision problems."

HAHAAHAHAAGAHAHAHAHAAGHAGHAGAHGAHG!
 
Original: *Beckon her over with finger* If I can make you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with my whole hand!
Ruined: *Beckon her over with finger* Hahaha! My god that was easy! Like you.
 
original:You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend
ruined: You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend, and she probably still looks better. In fact, got a spade i can borrow?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top Bottom