Okay I kind of get what you are saying there, I do disagree because you contridict yourself in your points and have missed/ignored clear points.
I would suggest that the biggest group that shout foul are those who backed but are not actively following and thus they are misinformed or going on rants without even looking at what is there. They may see some headlines from a few larger news outlets who often don't check either and go "OMG, it's failing. CIG are not really producing anything and just taking all our monies" , but if you watch and read what they are doing you will see there is leaps and bounds of new development. That is THE big problem for CIG, to control the information and make sure everyone can see it.
Now, to talk about the the videos such as the ATV show, this directly shows in detail what they are doing, how far along they are and what is new weekly. But then you say it cost subscribers or backers their funds they put in and should have spent it on development. You need to associate a cost with showing the community what you are doing and how because that is what the community wanted but then they get told "hang on, why are you making these videos that take up half a days work for 5 people and cost 'X' amount, I backed the game to be produced".
It really is a no win situation if on one side you are saying I want to get the game now, spend all your monies on developing, forget any videos, forums, communication and just get the game done but then at the same time ask them to show what they are doing and where development is at and they show where they are at weekly with it and yet you go they do not show it in any capacity which isn't correct.
Just because it isn't in your hands and playable does not mean they have not shown progress. And to say that you are not expecting things to change, re-iterate and even get scrapped completely and reworked is then just misunderstanding what development means.
Take Beyond Good & Evil 2. They have been working on it actively for 10 years and only now got the engine ready to start building the game past a small tech demo. With that they will over the next 3+ years of development still be redoing and reiterating parts as they go because that is how it works. They went back to the drawing board completely twice in that 10 years, scrapped all their work and have spent tens of millions doing so but we haven't seen it and as such no one is up in arms and even some are praising them in doing such because they know it is better.
CIG is in a similar situation in development and now people are riding them because it is done with public money and not publisher monies. Unfortunately it is something CIG have to deal with but it should be the responsibility of every backer who put monies into the game to know that it will be a long hard road, there will be lots of road blocks, forks in the road and similar. That is development. Projects get scrapped all the time by the tens of thousands a year around the world. There is a chance this will too. As slim as it is, there will always be a chance of that. It is the nature of development.
If anyone went in going awesome in 2012 I can see what CR wants, he said it will be done in 2014 I am in and want it then as that is what he has suggested as a goal and didn't think knowing the scope even then with 6 people currently in his team that they were being optimistic and best case were honestly fooling themselves. CR likely thought at the time if hit targets 100% of the time and even surpassed those targets we would have the game in 2014. So he used that date because it sells, it is salesmanship. He probably had a date that was really 2015 even for the scope of his 2012 vision but he decided it wouldn't be swallowed as well, it wouldn't get traction fast enough stating it was so far away. Was it a lie? Kinda I guess but that is marketing 90% of the time. Marketing gives best case super optimistic information because that is what sells to our human nature.
Again though even if it has been delayed. There a number that got delayed 2 years, a number that got pulled for 'X' years and then started development again. A number that got developed for 3 years, a new studio came in and then redeveloped it for another 3 years but they get a pass as (or a short period of being shouted at by press or public at worst) because it isn't public monies.
It is backers expectations and understanding that honestly needs to grow/change for a lot of this negativity. Yeah CIG have messed up, they made mistakes. They are human building a massive multi-country company from 6 people. That is significantly hard work. The growth rate they have shown compared to most companies is exponentially faster. There will be issues with teams, management and similar.
These are major factors to consider and people don't often consider them.